Watch These Men Finger Various Fruits In An Attempt To Understand The Vagina

Hello. Maybe you’re a dude who really wants to get into fingering the lady you’re into, because she’s sick of you treating her vagina like it’s nothing but a holster for your giant monster-wang. Maybe she’s grabbed your hand and placed it firmly on her vagina, in a clear and honest attempt to say, “Hey, why dontcha poke around in there?” And, maybe your hand has seized in fear and panic, so you simply gave her vag a nice pat and then whipped it out, assuming that by acknowledging the vagina itself, you were responding to her request that you fuck her silly before rolling over and eating a sandwich and falling asleep to Sportscenter.

Foreplay is awesome. Do it, all the time. If you don’t know what you’re doing, and asking for guidance is out of the realm of possibility, do all of womankind a favor and don’t watch this video of men demonstrating “proper” fingering techniques on a variety of tropical fruits. There’s also an arresting visual image for what not to do with a vagina, in case you were wondering.


“If she bleeds, you’re doing it wrong,” suggests the jocular narrator. Oh, word?

All of the suggested movements in this video are generally correct: don’t poke; be gentle; if she appears to be into it, for christ’s sake don’t stop. I imagine this video and things of its ilk have value to dudes who have always avoided touching the V for fear of losing a finger in there or being totally afraid of what to do and how to do it. Just remember that the vagine is not a monolith. What feels great for one person will be the worst thing in the entire world for someone else, so communicate. Ask.

Or, fuck it. Throw this up on the old iPad and go to town. [h/t Cosmopolitan]