Conventional wisdom says Valentine’s Day calls for sexy lingerie, but what do guys actually think of our attempts to spice things up with various forms of lace, ruffles, and leopard print? We asked real guys for their thoughts on 5 different lingerie options, from the simple to complicated to cozy, and also had them rate each look on a sexiness scale of 1-5 (1 being not sexy, 5 being sexiest). Some of their reactions might surprise you…
Relationships are a little like glaciers; under various pressures, they’re always moving and changing, gathering all sorts of debris. But after some time, they move so slowly, it’s easy to forget they’re there, particularly when you live together. To use a more familiar metaphor, one day your relationship is a wild ride, all loops and corkscrews, and then, out of nowhere, it’s mellowed and straightened out.
Actually, it’s worse than that. It’s stagnating. Read more…
I’m known amongst my friends as a serial dater. I enjoy going on first dates. Or I used to. In the last few years, I began to feel an encroaching anxiety before every first date. There was one thing standing between me and enjoying dating. It was a monster. Every time I met a girl I liked, I would sit at my computer and open my browser. My fingers would start tapping. And I couldn’t resist. Clicking. Going through images. Info.
“Look what I have to show you,” the monster would beckon me. And it had a lot to show me.
It knew my date’s favorite books, movies, music, even quotes. It knew her interests. It showcased videos of her with friends. And worst of all it was the gatekeeper of her photos. Sometimes just a few, sometimes hundreds, thousands. So many photos of the girl I hadn’t even gone out with yet! The monster would only show her good ones, of course. The bad ones were untagged, which made me wonder what the bad ones looked like. That monster was Facebook. And it was ruining my ability to date like a normal human being. Keep reading »
Valentine’s Day shouldn’t be about who loves you, but whom you love. It’s the one day out of the year when you should take account of those people in your life who make you gleefully vomit little candy hearts. Being loved back isn’t nearly as important in life as boldly, recklessly, sincerely loving someone regardless of any returns on investment. Making love, not taking it, is the primary occupation of the human condition, our core programming, whether we realize it or accept it or not. All other activities and pursuits are secondary.
Instead, Valentine’s Day feels like emotional extortion. To many men, it’s an inconvenience to dread, a relationship hoop set aflame which one must deftly prance through like an expertly trained poodle. And to other men, it’s a day of opportunity. Keep reading »
The “toxic bachelor.” It was a term we’d never really heard of until a 33-year-old male friend, fresh off a breakup, mentioned it. “I want to settle down,” he said. “I want to start a family. Plus, I’m getting to that age where if I don’t do it soon, I’m in danger of becoming a ‘toxic bachelor.’” A toxic bachelor, he explained, is when it’s no longer cute to be single, and seems sad and desperate instead. For this particular friend, his “toxic bachelor” age was 35, and we wanted to know if other men felt any kind of desperate pull to settle down. So we asked them. Over IM.
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