You know what has always struck me as unfair? That Valentine’s Day is largely considered to be a holiday for women. In all the ads for the holiday, jewelry, chocolates, flowers, etc. are all gifts given to women, from their devoted, tie-clad husbands and boyfriends. Bu what about dudes? Don’t they want cheesy tokens of love and affection too? Wouldn’t they like to be taken out for a romantic dinner or given a nice piece of man jewelry? (By which I mean a watch. Men should not wear any jewelry outside of a watch and a wedding band. That is a rule.) The first Valentine’s Day I spent with my ex, five years ago, we went out to dinner, but his parents had called up the restaurant and pre-paid for our meal, as a surprise. (I guess they had a sense that I was “The One,” which used to make me go, “Aww,” but now makes me go, “Oops!”) I, however, felt like getting him something too, and ended up giving him four new wine glasses — partially as a joke because I had broken one of his the week before. The point is, don’t men deserve and want a little wooing? And if so, how do they want to be wooed? I asked the fellas. Keep reading »
Tag Archives: what men think
1. I think I’m awesome, but seriously, why do you think I’m awesome?
2. I can speak dolphin. Which is how I help them.
3. I don’t have a driver’s license and I don’t know how to drive a car. But I know how to drive the ladies wild and I have a license to freak, freak you sweet and spicy, freak you like a jungle cat made out of lava.
4. I write poetry. Here’s a sample, “She walks in beauty, like the night/Of cloudless climes and starry skies/And all that’s best of dark and bright/Meets in her aspect and her eyes.” I just made that up, right now, on the spot.
5. Yes I can, did, will, etc. Keep reading »
Lately I’ve noticed that a lot of stars are showing up events or are photographed with visible nipple action, either in the form of hard, erect nipples poking through shirts (Paris Hilton), or thin fabric exposing the slightest bit of areolae shape and color (Beyonce, I am talking to you). With the insane array of products on the market to prevent such displays — from, you know, bras to breast petals — I’ve been wondering why on earth these ladies are walking out of the house with their headlights on. But beyond that, what do guys think? I mean, i think it goes without saying that breasts are beloved by all straight men, but is it true that guys are really hot for hard nipples? And what do they think of nipples in general? I think you know who I asked… Keep reading »
A sensitive guy’s emotional availability is decorative, a means by which to exploit a woman’s weakness for men who are not total beer-powered, boxer shorts wearing Guitar Heroes with mommy issues and 18 gigabytes of porn hidden in a computer file named “Unicorns.” This sort of dude displays his sensitivity with emo mixtapes, passionate rants on fluffy political issues like being pro-bunny rabbit or anti-death from shrapnel, and professions of understanding the subtle intricacies of the female heart. Keep reading »
Now that I’m back on the “dating scene,” I’ve realized that I’m still borderline idiotic when it comes to male-female courtships. My last relationship started off pretty typically — a dinner date here, a movie date there — but quickly spiraled into very serious, very quickly. We said I love you within two months, moved in together within five months, and were together for nearly five years. I can’t recall when we or if we had the whole “boyfriend/girlfriend” discussion, or how we knew we were seeing each other exclusively. It’s unfortunate, because I could use that knowledge now. For example, how in the hell do you know when your fun, dating relationship has progressed into boyfriend/girlfriend territory? Is it when you have the “we’re banging each other exclusively” conversation? When introductions are made to friends? When one of you slips up and and says “my boyfriend” in front of the other? And let’s say you’re dating each other exclusively (because dating, not to mention sleeping, with multiple people is extremely time consuming), when does THAT change into BF/GF? Seriously, can you tell I am confused? The guys on my IM are here to help… Keep reading »
I think I might be a sexist. But since most of you are vagina-enabled, I’ll let you tell me. Many of you possess testicles, as well, and I’ll invite you to chime in, too. To those who have both: All are welcome here.
I’m not proud of the fact that I might be sexist, but it seems more honest to say so than declaring that I’m a feminist. Which I’m not. I’m having a tough enough time trying to figure out how to be a righteous dude. I suppose the best contribution I can make to the struggle for gender equality is to try and be a better man. I can’t allow myself to politicize my inner-struggles, to become, as Gandhi said, the change I want to see in the world. So, yeah, I’m not a feminist, and I might be a sexist. But better I be aware of that, than ignorant to the prejudices that make me oh-so human. And that’s the best I can do. Keep reading »
Last week we wrote about the controversy surrounding Ms. magazine’s cover image which featured President Obama in a shirt that reads, “This Is What A Feminist Looks Like.” Around the same time, it was revealed that Obama does identify as a feminist, a fact that, frankly, impresses me. Many women with feminist values don’t identify as feminist and that’s even more true of men. But now that President Obama, whose inauguration was the most viewed, um, ever, has identified as a feminist AND the leading feminist magazine has declared him one, will male feminists be more in vogue? I decided to ask the guys on my IM. Check their responses, after the jump… Keep reading »
A couple of years ago, a friend of mine came to me for advice, and I think the advice I gave him was pretty good advice, if I do say so myself. Because when it comes to love and relationships, those who can, do. Those who can’t give love and relationship advice.
My friend had just proposed to his girlfriend. The wedding promised to be epic, “Vegas-style” and planned with Pentagon-like precision. The sort of wedding where you wouldn’t be surprised if a trained monkey dressed like a butler exploded out of a 17-tier wedding cake, holding a smaller, 10-tier wedding cake, as fireworks exploded, and an ABBA cover band parachuted in next to the champagne glass pyramid, while howling “Take A Chance On Me.” No expense spared. Keep reading »
After we watched Kate Winslet gush about her 15 year love for Leonardo DiCaprio at Sunday night’s Golden Globe Awards — in front of her husband, Sam Mendes, not to mention millions of viewers — we kind of got to wondering if men and women can really maintain tight friendships, if one or both of them is in a relationship. Personally, I’ve never been the jealous type and have never cared if my S.O. had close girlfriends — but then again, if I was ever given cause for worry (like they had hooked up before, or she was especially flirty) maybe my green-eyed monster would come out. And ever since the guys on my IM basically confirmed that men want to screw all their female friends on some level, I’ve wondered whether platonic friendships between men and women are even really possible, especially if there are boyfriends or girlfriends involved. So I went back to the fountains of boy wisdom to find out… Keep reading »
Go ahead and have sex on the first date if you want. If it feels good, do it. Ruin yourself. Get your rocks off. Surrender to chemistry, drink, irresponsibility. Indulge in the passion, throw caution to the wind, make a big sloppy mess of your love life. Your prince might not call you back if you rail him in the bathroom stall or after he slinks out of your apartment while you’re sleeping. If that happens, cry and wail! Just know that reports of the fragility of the human heart are greatly exaggerated. Keep reading »