Tag Archives: what men think

For The Guys: AskMen’s The Great Male Survey 2010

At AskMen, it’s our goal to understand exactly what it means to be a man. It’s a goal we pursue every day through our articles and our interaction with readers, and it’s why we’re once again turning to our readers to ask: Who is the modern man? We invite you to participate in our annual Great Male Survey to find out what has changed, what is new and what remains constant about being a man. Start with Part 1: Dating & Sex. Part II: Lifestyle launches May 31. Part III: Men in 2010 launches June 14. Check back for all the results on July 13. Read more Keep reading »

21 Nicknames Men Shouldn’t Give Their Johnsons

Here at The Frisky, we’re not too proud to think of nicknames for our genitals. In fact, we’ve even given you a list of approved nicknames for our vaginas. I mean, “penis” and “vagina.” So awkward to say, right? When it comes to johnsons, we may not know what we want to call it, but we sure know what we don’t want you to nickname your penis. Find out after the jump. Keep reading »

Mind Of Man: Why Men Cry

Men don’t cry. We squint. Boys might be made out of snips and snails and puppy dog tails, but men are made out of leather and steel and “Hungry Man” meals. Kick us in the baby wallet and we might keel over. Let forth a grizzly’s roar. But cry? Men have three basic emotions: The Wave, Hulk, and whiskey. Our hearts are fist-sized beer kegs. Tears are just cowardly beads of sweat too scared to jump off our brow when sawing wood.

I’ve heard tales of some men who’ve cried when laid off. Which is nowhere in the man manual. When laid off, a man makes eye contact, shakes hands, and then calmly walks to bar where he plots revenge.

When a woman does us wrong, do we weep? Ha! We turn up AC/DC. Pull the curtains. Turn off the lights. Stand in the shower with our clothes on. Oh, did you think we got misty when you laid us off from the love factory? Well, you were completely right. Women have two tear glands: one to keep their peepers moist, the other to flood whenever Nicholas Sparks gives someone cancer. Our eyes were misting because that’s how they work, like automatic sprinklers on a golf course. That’s how we keep the ol’ skull cams lubricated in their sockets. When I buried my first dog, I bravely bid little Falkor good journey to Valhalla, the Viking afterlife. The last time I went to the optometrist, I sucked the medicinal eye droplets that were rolling down my cheeks back up into my face. I am that disciplined.

But as always, when it comes to platitudinous declarations, there are exceptions.

I’ve heard tales of some men who’ve cried when laid off. Which is nowhere in the man manual. When laid off, a man makes eye contact, shakes hands, and then calmly walks to bar where he plots revenge.

I suppose some cry at movies like “Rudy,” or “Braveheart,” or any of the “Friday the 13th” movies. Those dope-smoking camp sluts killed Jason’s mommy! I remember watching that scene in “The Empire Strikes Back” when Han Solo bravely prepares himself to be carbon frozen. My right eye twitched. It’s theoretically possible that men cry listening to country music, but dive bars are dark for a reason and no one can see you in your pick-up truck, the window rolled down and the night air whipping past your face. There are dogs worth crying over, I suppose. Living proof that licks are the real language of love.

Did I mention there are aberrations to my theory? At least personally? I didn’t? Maybe I’ve cried. I can’t remember if I’ve written about instances where such an improbable, but not impossible, event occurred. I don’t actually know how to read, so I can’t really tell you. Okay. So. Here it goes. I didn’t exactly cry when my father died. I snuck into the ICU and touched his cold foot and then I politely removed my skin and wrung it dry. And I’ve wept for a very simple reason. Because I wasn’t the man I wanted to be. A good man. An honest man. A man who didn’t keep his promises. Only the future cares about apologies.

A man who failed to cradle a loved one’s heart as if it were a football made of glass. Who is forced to keep the company of wreckage. Whose regret turns his bones to ice. A man sobbing softly because the road before him is long, dark, lonely, and there’s no turning back. The fire was set, and his words can’t extinguish them. But he sobs because he’s afraid that deep down, he never will be that man his father told him to be. I have been that man. Those tears will never be shed again. I can still feel their scars on my eyelids.

Follow John DeVore’s preening narcissism on Twitter.

Poll: Do Looks Matter More To Men Or Women?

Do Looks Matter More To Men Or Women?

  • View Results
Loading ... Loading ...

Soft-core Porn Is The New Hardcore Porn

Thought the porn industry was suffering because of the recession? Think again. While the hardcore end of the adult movie business has taken a hit, the soft-core portion is doing quite well, thank you very much. Primarily available on cable TV networks like Cinemax, HBO, and Showtime, the medium in which people hump each other romantically without nary a pop shot in sight is staging a comeback. According to one of the top producers of “soft erotics,” L.A.-based MRG’s Marc Greenberg, soft-core “just keeps going, like a cockroach — you can’t kill it.” What is soft-core porn, you ask? Well, it’s defined in large part but what it isn’t. There’s no full-frontal male nudity or “extended close-up shots of female private parts.” Nowadays, “Co-Ed Confidential,” “Beverly Hills Bordello,” and “Zane’s Sex Chronicles” have a steady viewership of folks looking for something other than hardcore porn’s “wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am” aesthetic. The genre is particularly popular among women, who are finding explicit adult movies a bit much. For some, simulated sex is better than the real thing. [L.A. Times] Keep reading »

Men: What They’re Really Thinking


Men are so mysterious! And while many find that enigmatic air sexy, others prefer to ask guys point-blank: “Do you have feelings?” And then videotape their answers. Here are a few choice bros opening up, revealing all the manly secrets of the universe. Get your pen and paper ready, girl, because here are dudes demystified! Keep reading »

  • Zergnet: Simply Irresistible

  • HowAboutWe

  • Popular