For years, Hawaii was the happiest place in the country, but this time around, another state has ranked at #1. According to Gallup’s Well-Being Index, 2013′s happiest state was — drumroll — North Dakota. The Well-Being Index factors in various aspects of life, like work environments, health, and basic access to food, water and medical care. The closer to 100 a state’s score is, the higher its residents’ quality of life. North Dakota scored a 70.4, followed by South Dakota, Nebraska, Minnesota and Montana. I’m just as surprised as you are. States in the Midwest and West fared best on the wellbeing scale, while the South scored the lowest. The most sadface of states, weighing in with a score of 61.4, is West Virginia — for the fifth year in a row. Bummer. Keep reading »
The Tranquility Pod is here, and it’s kind of terrifying. This thing is not your standard waterbed, it’s a vibrating musical playground in your bed. The fiberglass pod, which looks like a scary spaceship, has a six-foot octagonal waterbed inside and LED “mood lighting” that moves in time with your pulse. The bed itself is temperature-controlled and covered in suede and memory foam. The best part? The bed’s 80-watt audio system includes a subwoofer in the bottom of the bed to make the sound waves move right through you. This could be a bachelor pad nightmare, or it could be the best sexytimes you’ve ever had. Hammacher Schlemmer, the company behind the creation, is only asking $30,000 for it. Can’t I just rent it for one nap? [Wired]
Finding an old douche at New York City Hall isn’t breaking news. Finding a 19th-century feminine hygiene device is.
Archaeologists uncovered a 3-inch contraceptive artifact during a 2010 excavation along the north side of City Hall in Manhattan — but thought it was a spice grinder until this year, DNAinfo reports. Read more on Huffington Post…
Alas, our days of ignorant bliss about the contents of Hot Pockets are over. Giant Foods has issued a massive recall of Philly Steak & Cheese Hot Pockets, because they may have been filled with “diseased and unsound” meat from a processing plant that evaded FDA inspections. As gross as the exact details are, is anyone really shocked at the revelation that a product called a “hot pocket” is made with sub-par meat? I think comedian Jim Gaffigan said it best: “What was the idea behind Hot Pockets? Was there a guy in a marketing meeting somewhere, like, ‘Hey I got an idea: How about we take a Pop-Tart and fill it with really nasty meat? You could cook it in a sleeve thing, and you could dunk it in the toilet.’”
Seriously though, if you have Philly Steak & Cheese Hot Pockets in your freezer, DO NOT EAT THEM. Take them back to the store, get your money refunded, and then watch Jim’s entire Hot Pockets routine, which I’ve posted below for posterity’s sake. Keep reading »
Do you love your cats? Do you also have $35,000 to spare? A California man did, and he used it to turn his home into a live-in playground for his 18 cats. The house includes wall ledges, ramps, and custom tunnels all specially designed for his kitties. The home also has a spiral feline “staircase” and a custom ventilation system to keep the air clean. He wanted his cats to experience daily adventures without having to go outdoors, and paired with the cheerful colors used to decorate the house, the place is basically a kitten’s version of Disneyworld. Check out the full gallery here, and don’t worry – just giving your cat the occasional treat and pat on the head is also considered good cat parenting. Not all of us have pet palaces to build at our disposal! [Gizmodo, Trillium] [Photo: Trillium Enterprises]
There are Valentine’s Day enthusiasts and there are the rest of us — a bunch of people on a mission to ignore the most pointless holiday of the year. If you find yourself dodging drugstores so as to avoid being inundated with Russell Stover chocolates and cheaply made teddy bears selling for way more than they’re worth (who can blame you?), you are probably one of the latter. May I suggest that you consider a last-minute jaunt to Georgia where you won’t have to wittiness any of that consumerism fuckery. Keep reading »
When the east coast gets weeks of snow, followed by freezing rain, followed by icy temperatures, you will find yourself deterred from running the most basic errands. You’ll consider putting on a pair of snow shoes for your morning commute or riding a homemade sled to pick up a few essentials. Anne Decker, of Mechanicsville, Virginia, found herself in similar predicament to many of us on Wednesday night: dying for a glass of wine and too snowed in to go anywhere on foot or by car. Instead of rolling around on the living room floor and groaning like the rest of us did, Decker was of the mindset that “you gotta find a way to make humor out of any situation.” So, she strapped on her cross-country skis and made the one mile trek to her local Kroger, put her skis in her shopping cart and got that dang bottle of wine. The manager told her she was the first customer to ever ski into the store and took the opportunity for a photo op. Wow. I’m seriously impressed. [NBC12]
Pierce Thiot has a magnificent beard, and he’s not afraid to use it … to store household items like toothpicks, spaghetti, straws, gummy worms, and lit matches. Pierce and his wife, Stacy, have started a Tumblr blog dedicated to these beardly feets called Will It Beard, which is full of photos of Pierce’s beard stuffed with various knick-knacks. The lit matches and razors are kind of freaking me out, but on the whole it’s a strangely charming photographic ode to the many uses of facial hair. [Junk Culture]
Atlantic City, New Jersey, has always been known as the place where your most impossible dreams can come true (or is that just me?), but this week’s Bacon Week Festival is taking the adventures to new heights. The festival is taking over the Tropicana Casino and Resort with goodies like bacon milkshakes, bacon toothpaste and and bacon-infused vodka.
For your Valentine’s Day needs, the festival includes bacon covered in chocolate and shaped like roses as well as — wait for it — bacon cupcakes. Let’s be real, that cupcake sounds like the highlight of the whole week. Attendee James Sanders did us the favor of explaining the layers of a satisfying bacon-chomping experience: Keep reading »