Teachers everywhere, hear this tale of porn-watching gone wrong and cower in fear. Why is it never a good idea to browse amputee porn just moments before your students arrive? Oh, because Murphy’s Law dictates that some way, somehow, the fornicating amputees will find their way onto the projector instead of your intended lesson plans and that before you even realize your grave mistake, one of your students will snap a photo and send it to the local newspaper. Keep reading »
Earlier this week, a woman was arrested after attempting to shoplift 330 Totino’s Pizza Rolls from an Arkansas Walmart. My feelings about this story can only be expressed one way — in rhyming couplets:
For anyone who’s ever tried a pizza roll or five,
you know the ooey, gooey taste can make you feel alive.
And for anyone who gets a rush from stealing little things,
the urge to pilfer pizza rolls would surely prove tempting. Keep reading »
It’s a harsh job climate out there right now, as anyone scrambling to cope with unemployment and underemployment knows. And it’s an especially harsh world out there for anyone who had the misfortunate of crossing one communications professional in Northeastern Ohio.
Kelly Blazek is kind of a big deal: she runs a Cleveland Job Bank House and has gone off on anyone who has dared to try and make a professional connection with her that they are too “green” to have. As explained to the blog CleveScene, jobseekers reach out to her to get on her members-only “NEOHCommJobs” listserv. According to her, the listserv boasts over 7,300 subscribers and breaks job openings before they are posted elsewhere. It sounds like a great resource for Cleveland-ites looking for communications connections and jobs.
Perhaps it’s too great a resource. See, it seems Kelly Blazek has let running some rinky-dink Ohio listserv get to her head. Read this email from a jobseeker, followed by Blazek’s response: Keep reading »
Here’s proof that you’re never, ever too old to play dress-up: a group of senior citizens at a nursing home in Germany recently recreated 12 iconic movie scenes for a photo calendar. The residents, who ranged in age from 75 to 98 got all dolled up as James Bond, Holly Golightly, and, of course, Jack and Rose. The calendar was produced as a gift for the residents and their families, and is not for sale. Too bad, because I would totally buy one! After the jump, check out a few more snaps of senior citizens acting out classic scenes from “Breakfast At Tiffany’s,” “Rocky,” and “The Seven Year Itch”…
Keep reading »
On one hand, I do not envy this poor woman at all. Giving birth on NYC’s filthy sidewalk, right out in the open, with strangers — helpful though they may be — all around me? Shudder. Oh and how convenient, the local news is right there, ready to capture the whole thing on film! Even worse. (Though I’m guessing she had to give her permission for them to air it, in which case she must not have minded that much?) And such helpful commentary from eyewitnesses: “She was like, ‘oh, my God, the baby’s coming.’ And then I could see the baby’s head coming out.” But on the other hand, a labor so speedy that you don’t even have time to make it to the hospital? That sounds easier than a lot of birth stories I’ve heard. (For the record, mom and baby are doing a-okay!) [HyperVocal]
Those of us with with a uterus know what it’s like to be desperate for a heating pad to ease the writhing, stabbing pain from menstruation cramps. It turns out, we could go for a little more relief directly at the source — by way of Korea, there now exist heated panty liners. The blog British Beauty Blogger posted pictures of the pad, which her friend picked up on a trip to Japan. She said the package contains a “heated sachet,” which gets very hot and is not to be worn “directly in contact with your nethers.” I guess it’s not so much a “heated panty liner” as a heated object you wear it underneath a panty liner? Either way, the whole concept of a heated panty liner seems similar to stuffing those handwarmers that people put in their mittens down your panties.
If any Frisky readers speak Korean, I would love a translation on the packaging of what I think are the suggested uses for a heated panty linter because half of them don’t make any sense from the pictures. Skiing? Sitting on a chair? Holding a baby? I don’t even want to risk any burns on my vag and/or inner thighs, so my only suggested use is laughing at this. [British Beauty Blogger] [Images via British Beauty Blogger]
This week marked the 450th anniversary of the death of Michelangelo. Cake artist Michelle Wibowo commemorated the occasion in a very, ahem, sweet way, by recreating his masterpiece, “The Creation Of Adam,” using frosting, marshmallows, and sprinkles. The resulting edible artwork is breathtaking (not to mention drool-inducing), and the entire process — which took 168 hours and half a billion cake sprinkles — was documented in this time-lapse video. It’s calming and slightly hypnotic to watch her turn a pile of sprinkles into God. And now I really want a piece of cake. [YouTube via Design Taxi]
A Japanese dentist has been arrested for performing a procedure on a patient that absolutely no one has ever heard of. When the 20-something patient visited the the office for a routine exam, the 53-year-old dentist told the woman that her teeth were badly misaligned and that he could fix them by massaging the tight muscles in her chest. No braces or anything, just a little groping will do the trick! Keep reading »