A couple of weeks ago we heard about a family who witnessed some ghosts getting freaky in their living room, but at least those humping haunts had the decency to keep their phantasmagorical paws to themselves. UK woman, Doris Birch, isn’t quite so lucky. For the last four months, the 73-year-old grandmother claims that she has been groped nightly by a ghost. “It’s like an octopus … I was lying in bed when I felt this creepy pair of hands. I kicked frantically and it went away. Next time it came I hurled the duvet on to the floor!” she said of her visitor. It’s obvious that she’s dealing with an incubus, a male demon that lies upon sleeping women and tries to have sex with them. Or she is suffering from dementia. Either one. Keep on clicking for more stories of (alleged) sexual encounters of the third kind. [Huffington Post]
There seems to be an influx in creepy football coaches, or at least in the public stepping forward to report them: An assistant coach at Staples High School in Westport, Connecticut is in trubs for allegedly providing freshman players with his personal username and password for a membership-only porn site. A student reported the incident to faculty members after he overheard the coach relaying the porno password to team members. The coach has since been suspended from his position and barred from any contact with team members or students. Helping young teen boys look at porn certainly does not compare in any way, shape or form to the sexual abuse that occurred at Penn State. But, still, a fully-grown male providing porn to 14-year-old boys is kinda gross, right? I mean, he knows these kids know how to use Google. [Deadspin]
How much is having the perfect body worth to you? For 50-year-old Jayne Fenney, of Kent, UK, it was worth more than having a place to live. So she sold her house in order to afford the plastic surgery she desired. Keep reading »
FYI to all pregnant ladies: you can now booze responsibly, sort of. Introducing ArKay, aka “halal whiskey.” ArKay’s website boasts, “this non-alcoholic drink can be considered a soft drink and is suitable for any party occasions.” Alas, whiskey experts have spoken and ArKay doesn’t hold a candle to the real deal. The Scotch Whiskey Association is horrified that the company would even utilize the term “whiskey” in the product’s description and are fighting to keep it out of Europe. The legal affairs director for the SWA even sniffed, ”Such promotion is taking advantage of the high quality reputation of the product that is whiskey, which is a distilled spirit produced from natural ingredients, when it is in fact just a soft drink with artificial flavourings.” (Sheesh, it sounds like he could use a drink!) I can only imagine that ArKay would taste like the watery dregs at the end of a cocktail. But you’ve got to love their tagline: “Don’t drink and drive … unless it’s ArKay!” Pregnant Frisky readers, would you ever drink non-alcoholic whiskey … er, “whiskey”? [Gothamist]
Thousands of dedicated fans turned out over the weekend to see “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 1.” But for one teenage girl, the tragedy of not making it was a lot worse than choosing between Jacob or Edward.
Police in Illinois arrested an “extremely upset” 18-year-old girl on Saturday after she told authorities that she crashed her car because her boyfriend did not take her to see the new “Twilight” movie.
Cops found Olivia Christina Ornelas “extremely intoxicated” and after discovering her car, missing the front right tire and spun out in a ditch off Route 71, the Chicago Sun-Times reports. Read more…