In yet another blow to their species (and their dignity), two pandas at the Edinburgh Zoo refused to “do sex” this week and gift the world with a baby panda. Female panda bears only ovulate once a year, so the pressure was on for Sweetie and Sunshine, who had a 36 hour window to get it in. Zookeepers respectfully turned off the zoo’s public “pandacam” to give the bears some privacy and opened the zoo’s “love tunnel” between their separate enclosures to encourage romance. Things seemed promising when that filthy little minx Sweetie “called out incessantly” to her lover, as us ladies are wont to do, and pressed her nose and paws up against a grate. (There’s video here and it’s safe for work, but rather indignifying.) Keep reading »
Vaginas are not meant to be storage units. They are not meant to be purses. They are not meant to be secret hiding places. You are not supposed to put unsterilized foreign objects in them. Most of us understand these rules. But you’d be surprised. Some women cannot be stopped from violating the terms and conditions of their vaginas. If you dare, click through to see the weirdest things women have stashed in their kitties, the poor things.
She was lovin’ it a little too much. Manatee resident Christine Faith Baker, 47, was arrested after she allegedly offered sexual favors for two McDonald’s dollar-menu cheeseburgers, according to the Miami Herald.
An undercover officer invited Baker into his car on Friday and started talking about sex. Baker allegedly said that her fee was two McDoubles — the dollar-menu version of a double cheeseburger — costing a grand total of $2.75. Read more …
New York City’s famous Carnegie Deli recently unveiled the “Jet Bow” sandwich, an edible ode to new New York Jets quarterback Tim Tebow. The sandwich is a massive 4-pound stack of pastrami, corned beef, roast beef, lettuce, tomatoes, mayo, and American cheese between four slices of white bread. The recipe definitely delivers the message about Tebow being an “all-American boy,” but we don’t think it gives the full picture. After all, Tebow is an evangelical, extremely conservative, pro-life, waiting-til-marriage, abstinence-only advocate. After the jump, a list of ingredients Carnegie Deli forgot…. [People Magazine] Keep reading »
Things you don’t want to hear after you’ve been shot: “I’m sorry, I thought you were a bird.” This was Colorado man Derrill Rockwell’s excuse for shooting a 23-year-old woman in the head with .22-caliber rifle. He thought he was taking down a pesky, red-feathered bird who was harassing his cats. But it turns out it was just a woman with a red mohawk. An easy mistake to make? I guess it didn’t help that he was 90-feet away and she was passed out drunk. Even though the woman survived the head wound, she may be in trouble for the bag of meth found near her. How did I know meth would be involved in this story somehow? Eh, just had a hunch. Not that this makes it her fault for being mistaken for a bird. That blame lies squarely with her mohawk. As for Rockwell, he was slapped with five years probation (he was banned from owning a gun after an attempted burglary conviction in 1995) and a $10,000 fine. He also clearly needs a pair of binoculars if he plans to do any further bird watching. [Boing Boing]
Can this be true? Or is it a ganache-induced fever dream? The Little Chocolate Shop, a chocolate factory in Leyburn, Yorkshire, UK, is allowing guests overnight stays in their “chocolate suite.” The suite features “edible furnishings, a chocolate fountain and a fancy dress box filled with Wonka-esque accessories, aprons and toques,” which will be replenished daily. WHAT. You had me at “Wonka.” And that’s not all: Guests can watch chocolate being made at the factory and end their stay with a “chocolate breakfast.” Chocolate breakfast — two words that sound so right together. This chocoholic fantasy is only available until April 8th and all proceeds will benefit Breast Cancer UK. The “chocolate suite” only sleeps four, so gather your friends to fight amongst themselves now. That might really be worth a hunger games. [Telegraph UK]