Most people would agree that going through airport security is annoying, and thanks to x-ray machines and frequent pat-downs, the process has become more and more invasive. This week, at the Portland airport, 50-year-old John E. Brennan decided he’d had enough, so when it came time to remove his shoes, he removed all of his clothes. Unfortunately no one else joined in the naked protest, and two security screening lanes were closed as TSA agents tried to convince Brennan to cover up. He was eventually arrested and charged with disorderly conduct and indecent exposure. The best part of this whole story might be a quote from Brennan’s father, responding to questions from reporters: “He’s never really under any stress. He works for a computer company in California. He does something with the Internet, which is just kind of mystical to me. This is quite a surprise.” [KATU]
Talk about sexual harassment in the workplace: Bartenders at a pub in the UK say someone in their bar is indiscriminately pinching their butts. But it’s not a patron whose getting grabby … it’s a ghost. Both male and female staff at The Queens Arms in Birmingham report feeling “a very firm pinch” which happens “day and night.” They assume it’s from a “small, bald, smartly-dressed” phantom who haunts the 170-year-old pub, moving chairs, singing and causing mysterious puffs of smoke. Explained the manager, in adorable British parlance, “You turn round, but there’s no one there. It’s most off-putting.” Most off-putting, indeed! And wily, too. At least if a drunken patron was getting fresh there would be some sort of physical entity to slap. [Daily Mail UK]
Lickable wallpaper was one of the most deliciously weird fantasy foods dreamed up by Roald Dahl in “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory,” and I definitely spent many hours of my childhood staring at my bedroom walls, wishing they were covered in magical fruit flavors instead of wood paneling from the 70s. Now it looks like my dream is finally coming true: the world’s first lickable wallpaper has been unveiled in a London elevator, comprised of 1,325 cookies that passengers can enjoy on their way to any of the building’s 16 stories. The bad news? It’s kind of horrifying to see people licking the walls of an elevator. The company claims that a bell boy removes every licked cookie to avoid a whimsical wallpaper-induced outbreak of Rage virus, but even so, I think I’m filing this one under “dead childhood dreams.” [Laughing Squid]
Heidi Hankins has always been a smartypants: by age two she could read and count to 40, by age three she could add and subtract, and now, at age 4, she has been inducted into Mensa with an IQ of 159. To put that number into perspective, the average adult has an IQ of 100; Stephen Hawking has an IQ of 160. Heidi’s parents, a public health lecturer and an artist from Winchester, England, suspected she was bright but were shocked when they heard the results. And according to her father, Heidi’s already mastered the art of sarcasm as well: “The other day I gave her mash and fishfingers for dinner — something quite boring — and her response was ‘that’s impressive,’ so she has a sense of humor, too.” Damn, between the 86-year-old gymnasts and the 4-year-old geniuses, I’m feeling like quite the underachiever these days. [BBC News]
This is Cocoa, a three-year-old Alpine Pygmy goat who lives in Summit, New Jersey, but enjoys frequent trips into Manhattan (I guess that makes her a bridge and tunnel goat?). While in the city, she accompanies her owner into shops, takes long walks around Soho, rides the subway, and lounges in Central Park. Says her owner: “She doesn’t like goats, she doesn’t like farms, she likes the people and the city.” I’ve always wanted a pygmy goat, but now I want a chic, urban pygmy goat who will sip cosmos with me. Click here to see a photo slideshow of Cocoa’s latest adventures in the Big Apple. [Reuters]
We’ve all been there. Agence France-Presse reports that a German man in Munich allegedly had to flee to the police after a woman demanded too much sex.
After several amicably agreed upon rolls in the hay, the man reportedly tried to leave the woman’s apartment. But she wouldn’t let him exit and instead allegedly insisted on more sex. That’s when the man ran to the cops for help, according to authorities. Read more…