I believe I have discovered the saddest eBay auction ever. Albuquerque woman, Lori N., was auctioning off her “slightly used soul” for $2,000. Formerly a freelance writer, Lori’s life changed completely after being hit by a drunk driver five years ago. She was in a coma, and suffered a stroke, many broken bones, a collapsed lung and lost one of her breasts. She figured since her body was shot, she might as well market her soul. For bidders on Lori’s soul, she wanted to make it clear that what she would deliver is the “opportunity to save [her] soul.” Along with the purchase will come a “certificate detailing the white and black marks on [her] soul.” A spiritual car facts of sorts. But what she’s truly hoping for from this auction is not money, but the chance to make contact with someone else’s soul. Keep reading »
Although the theme for their Somerset, England prom was “Charlie & The Chocolate Factory,” two young ladies in England did not hold back from reliving the scenes they had once performed with their Barbies years ago. Emily Pounde and Hannah Jagger arrived at their prom dressed up in their gowns but encased inside giant Barbie boxes.
Pounde’s “mum” is the mastermind behind these nearly $400 creations, made out of plywood and Perspex. ”After all the feedback the girls’ entrance got, I’d say it was worth the effort,” Christine, Pounde’s mother, told the Western Gazette. Keep reading »
Bras, braces, makeup are all rites of passage for many teen girls. But if you’re a member of the Marshall family, so are boob jobs.
Britney Marshall, a 14-year-old from Nottinghamshire, England, is the youngest girl of the Marshall family and the only one without breast implants. Her mother, Chantal Marshall, told the Sun, “Britney is going through a funny phase at the moment and saying she doesn’t want to get her boobs done.”
And Marshall really wishes she would, telling the Sun:
“At the moment she doesn’t really have what I would say are boobs — but I’d like her to follow in her sisters’ footsteps… I really love the fake look of my girls and I know Britney will go that way when she’s a bit older.” Read more…
In “Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory,” Violet Beauregarde met her sad end when she chewed a piece of Wonka’s Three-Course-Dinner Gum. The most amazing, sensational piece of gum in the world included tomato soup, roast beef and a baked potato. But it was the dessert course that went all wrong. The blueberry pie made the poor Violet turn violet and blow up just like a blueberry. Archie McPhee’s TV Dinner Gumballs promise that the same thing won’t happen to you. Instead of one meal, the gumballs are divided into courses — roast beef, buttered corn and apple cobbler. If only Wonka had thought of that, Violet would still be chomping away. The dream is still alive for all of us gum addicts, Violet. Only $3.50 for a week’s supply. I may be switching to gum for dinner. [Laughing Squid]
Dear Candice Sortino,
I know you are facing criminal charges for the recent stunt you pulled at the College Baseball World Series in Omaha, Nebraska. When asked why you made a mad dash out on to the field to pinch two baseball players’ butts you responded “Because there were so many people watching and it’s against the rules and you get tackled too.” You rebellious little minx. I know you think that you got “caught up in the moment” and made a mistake, but I, for one disagree.
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