Welp, now I’ve heard everything. A few conspiracy theorists have decided that the rapper Pitbull predicted the Malaysian Airlines plane crash/disappearance two years ago in his song “Get It Started” (above). These folks with too much time on their hands — i.e. YouTube commenters — say the lyrics to the song makes references to certain aspects of the plane’s mysterious disappearance. Specifically, “No Ali, No Frasier, but for now off to Malaysia” and “Two passports, three cities, two countries, one day.” According to the UK’s Daily Mirror:
Viewers on YouTube are convinced the two passports is a reference to the stolen Austrian and Italian passports used by two Iranians to board MH370. They also believe the three cities refer to the capital cities of Malaysia, China and Vietnam and the two countries are Malaysia and Vietnam. Furthermore, they assert the lyrics “No Ali, No Frasier, but for now off to Malaysia” are a reference to Mr Ali, the man who bought tickets for the two Iranians to travel on board MH370.
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Stupid people getting drunk is about to get stupider: powdered alcohol is on the way. A company called Palcohol was inspired to create powdered booze that can then be added to other liquids in order to make drinks. Powdered rum and powdered vodka are standalone versions or you could try powdered Cosmopolitan, powdered Mojito, powdered Lemondrop or the “Powderita,” a powdered Margarita. That totally sounds like some NASA shit right there. The inventor of Palcohol said he came up with the idea because he didn’t want to have to carry heavy bottles of booze around. But so far, Palcohol is staying mum on how they do it: “If we told you, we’d have to shoot you. We are in the process of patenting it and it is currently patent pending.” And despite earlier jokes that brought negative media attention, they also do not recommend snorting the powdered booze. Something tells me that will not stop some people from doing it anyway. But you can add them to sauces or or guacamole for a little extra kick. As tempting as a powdered Mojito sounds, I think I’ll pass on this one. [Palcohol via SB Nation]
Here are a bunch of other stupid ways to get drunk or high that WE TOTALLY DO NOT CONDONE YOU TRYING, you hear?
[Image of a mojito via Shutterstock]
No stolen hearts on this first date. Instead, a New Jersey woman says a man she met on a dating website stole her dog and her flat-screen TV. Read more on Huffington Post…
On Monday, Lukyanova posted a selfie to her Facebook page that shows her bare-faced and wearing a black bikini. Just hours earlier, she posted a photo of her all done up and dressed in a frothy pink skirt for a modeling gig. Read more on Huffington Post…
When a mom in Lincoln, Nebraska, realized her three-year-old son was missing from their apartment, she called the police, and a frantic search of the neighborhood ensued. Meanwhile, at a bowling alley down the street, employees were doing a double take at a shockingly realistic stuffed toddler toy that had suddenly appeared in their claw crane machine. But wait a second…upon closer inspection, they realized that stuffed toddler toy was actually a living, breathing child that had somehow climbed into the machine and gotten stuck. The bowling alley employees flagged down the cops, who connected the dots, removed the kid from the machine, and returned him to his grateful (and very confused) mother. No one is sure how he managed to get into the machine, although we can only assume he was returning for a toy that had fallen out of the crane claw moments before it made it to the prize chute, which he felt was rightfully his (those machines are so annoying). If so, his plan worked: the bowling alley owner let the toddler take home the stuffed animal of his choice for his trouble. [Crimefeed]
According to a research team at Simon Fraser University, your brain hits a major peak at 24. Think about that for a moment: your cognitive motor performance is all downhill after your early-20s. Keep reading »
Good news for modern witches and wizards who don’t have time to pursue a traditional magic education: Hogwarts School of Witchcraft & Wizardry now offers an online option. The tech-savvy training program, called Hogwarts Is Here, was dreamed up by a group of enthusiastic Harry Potter fans who wanted to give people the experience of Hogwarts (without the need to ram yourself repeatedly into the brick wall at Platform 9 & 3/4). Here’s the lowdown from the site: Keep reading »
“Ugh, if I see one more magazine with Kim Kardashian on the cover, I’m going to puke!” I’m sure more than a few people have found themselves muttering those very words, but when Mike Amess says it, he means it — literally. The most ridiculous story of the day award goes to The Daily Mail, which has outdone itself with their profile of Amess and his vomit-inducing fear of the entire Kardashian family. According to the Daily Mail, Amess breaks out into a “cold sweat” whenever he sees a Kardashian — although his fear seems especially focused on Kim — and “the sight of a semi-naked Kim even makes him vomit with disgust.” REALLY?
The 24-year-old from Exeter explains, “Just hearing the sound of the Kardashians’ nasal voices or catching a glimpse of them on screen makes me feel nauseous and shaky. My hands get clammy, my breathing gets heavier and I start sweating. Sometimes, I get teary and want to retch.” Keep reading »
I know as well as anyone that nothing stands between a woman and her wine, and in the case of Florida’s Desiree J. Taylor, that includes pants. The 35-year-old woman was caught on a surveillance camera meandering around a Publix supermarket in Ocala in just a T-shirt and a pair of slippers, listening to music on her tablet, and then waltzing out of the store with a stolen case of boxed wine under her arm. She was arrested yesterday morning on charges of disorderly conduct, resisting a merchant and petty theft, police said. I’m guessing they decided not to charge her with indecent exposure on account of the fact that she at least paired her pantlessness with a T-shirt that came down to the tops of her thighs. Let this be a lesson, criminals — if you’re going to go pantless, make sure you’re at least wearing a top that could pass for a mini dress. [Crime Feed]
Shockingly enough, pantless crimes are really quite common. It seems like every other week I read a story about the police picking up a perp who forgot to put his or her pants on before committing some nefarious deed. Way to be discreet! Here are just eight mostly recent examples of criminals who drew even more attention to their illegal activity by breaking the law pantless…