Tag Archives: weird news

Criminal Butt Dials Cops During Murder Plot

Be My BF: Cheese Thief
Share your muenster with me, man! Read More »
Be My BF: Taco Cop
This guy got arrested for giving a cop tacos instead of his ID. Read More »
Be My BF: Court
We want to date this "People's Court" announcer. Read More »
butt dialing Scott Simon

Just a wee suggestion, but if you’re going to talk about your plot to follow a dude home and murder him? Make sure all of your electronic devices are off. That’s the hard lesson learned by Florida man Scott Simon learned earlier this week when he accidentally butt-dialed 911 in the midst of discussing his plan to kill.

Simon can be heard chatting up his murder plot minutes before Nicholas Walker was shot while driving on I-95. The shooting, and the resulting car crash, shut down the highway for several hours. And while police don’t believe Simon pulled the trigger, they do think he collaborated with someone else to kill Walker. Earlier in the day, Walker and Simon got in an altercation — at a local Waffle House.

Simon’s been charged with first degree murder. [MSN] [Cell phone photo courtesy Shutterstock]

Don’t Worry, Everyone: World Nutella Day Will Live On

Nutella Cheesecake
No baking involved! Read More »
Nutella Thieves
Stolen Nutella? Really? Read More »

For the last six years, World Nutella Day founder Sara Rosso has been celebrating and publicizing the chocolate hazelnut holiday, and has amassed quite a following–including 40,000 likes on Facebook. WND encourages Nutella lovers to buy and eat more Nutella, so it came as quite a shock when Ferrero, Nutella’s manufacturer, sent Rosso a cease-and-desist letter last week and shut down the whole thing. Grinch status, right? Luckily the story doesn’t end there. Keep reading »

This Woman Is Trying To Give Birth To A Shark

Vampire Baby
Twilight vampire reborn doll
That's one creepy-ass baby. Read More »

“I love a good piece of dolphin meat on my plate, but every time I feel bad for eating an endangered animal,” 32-year-old artist, Ai Hasegawa, told Vice. “We’re soon going to be facing a global food shortage crisis. But I still want to give life, I don’t want 30 years of painful menstruation to have all been in vain. And I want to eat good meat.”

What 30-something woman hasn’t been faced with such dilemmas concerning food and reproduction? While most of us chose to avoid dolphin meat/baby making, hoping the problem would rectify itself, Ai Hasegawa got busy looking for options that were “less costly than raising a human” with “fewer responsibilities.” To reconcile both her desire to give life and her need to eat good meat, she came up with an unconventional solution: the idea of women birthing endangered species and eating them.

Hasegawa’s project, “I wanna deliver a Shark…,”  tackles “the problem of human reproduction in an age of over-population and environmental crisis” with a literal attempt to birth a shark. And why a shark? Because, her initial research suggests that sharks are the most compatible with the human body and “they’re endangered, their life-span is almost as long as that of a human, and most importantly, they’re delicious.” Keep reading »

College Student Rescued From Mountain After Getting High & Taking Off All Her Clothes

Be My BF: Zebra Drunk
This guy took his zebra and parrot to the bar with him, natch. Read More »
Be My Boyfriend: Meth Guy
He ate a bobcat while on meth, so what? Read More »
Be My BF: Drunk
This guy was too drunk to pose for his own mug shot. Read More »
Taylor Powers

We all make mistakes. And Taylor Randall, the University of Colorado undergrad who had to be coaxed off a mountain by police yesterday, is no exception. On Monday, the 21-year-old communications major went hiking with a couple of friends in the mountains surrounding Boulder, Colorado. While on their journey, the three decided to take some psychotropic mushrooms.

Mushrooms on a mountain? Sounds dreamy, huh? Eh, not so much.

Keep reading »

Today In Food Crimes: Man Arrested For Rubbing Pepperoni On His Salami — Plus A Pickle Attack!

Be My BFs: Chicken
These guys stole $65K in chicken wings. Read More »
Lion Tacos?
Is it unethical to serve lion meat? Read More »
Breast Milk Attack!
Why did this woman attack cops -- with breast milk? Read More »

Sometimes, when I’m deciding what to eat (or what not to eat) for lunch, I cruise for the latest food news for ideas. Last week, I told you about an uproar over lion tacos. Today, I stumbled upon some really strange food crimes. After the jump, a meat-on-meat masturbation mishap and a pickle attack! It’s all so phallic. Keep reading »

Today In Terribleness: Mom Tries To Unload Toddler On Craigslist

The 1% Does Disney
Rich mothers are hiring disabled tour guides at Disney World. Read More »
Mom Forces Daughter...
To get pregnant. And she's only 14. Read More »

I so desperately want to tell you about good stuff in the world. Like, Joe, the retired barber who cuts homeless peoples’ hair in exchange for hugs. Let Joe remind you that humans are great sometimes. I wish Joe’s haircuts cancelled out Stephanie Redus’ attempt to unload her toddler son on Craigslist. The 29-year-old Texas mom was charged with “unlawfully intentionally and knowingly” placing her son, Conner Danger Redus, up for adoption. In an ad posted on CL on May 1st, Redus said:

“Hi, I’m trying to adopt out my three year old son. I’m not in a good place in my life and don’t feel like I can care for him properly, but I don’t know where to start. If you or know anyone who is interested in caring for him please let me know. I’m a single mom and can’t do this. Thanks, Desperate.”

Keep reading »

Indiana Steak ‘N Shake Waitress Receives A 7000% Tip

Restaurant Server Secrets
40 things your waiter really wants you to know! Read More »

CeCe Bruce has been working as a server at an Indianapolis Steak ‘n Shake for the past two years while going to school part-time. One of the restaurant’s regular customers, who is known as Miss Jo, comes in at least once a week, and developed a fondness for Bruce. After eating breakfast at one of Bruce’s tables earlier this week, Miss Jo asked if she could leave a “ridiculously large tip” on her $6 bill. Keep reading »

We’re Breaking Up: Grown Man Gets Stuck In McDonald’s High Chair, Must Be Rescued By Police

Breaking Up: Ice Cream
This guy got caught not sharing his ice cream with his girlfriend. Watch »
Breaking Up: Library
He's banned from all libraries on earth. Read More »
Breaking Up: Crisco
He took meth and lathered up his naked body with Crisco. Read More »

Dear Dude,

Well, you really screwed this one up. You thought it’d be sooooo funny to pretend to be a baby and get in a McDonald’s-provided high chair? But you didn’t count on getting stuck in there, did you?

Cork, Ireland, police were rushed to the scene, and had to pry you out of the high chair. And dude, you were there all by yourself. Keep reading »

As I Always Feared, There’s Lots Of Poop In Public Swimming Pools

Poop Revenge
You can send someone revenge poop in the mail through an online service. Read More »
How To Poop 24 Karat Gold
These pills will do it! Read More »

Each summer, around the time that it hits about 90 degrees and 90 percent humidity, I walk by the public pool at the park in my neighborhood and contemplate diving in. I ache for a cool dip. But then I see all the children in the pool and first thing I think is, You can’t go swimming, there’s DOODIE in there. Perhaps I was scarred by watching “Caddyshack” too many times as a kid. I know it was just a candy bar, but I’ve never been able to rid myself of the nagging suspicion that there is real scat in my local swimming pool. Turns out, I was right.

According to a new report that will ruin public swimming pools for you forever, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention discovered that about 58 percent of public pools in the Atlanta area tested positive for fecal E.Coli bacteria. I can only imagine that these stats are consistent around the country, which means that most kids shit in the pool. Keep reading »

You Don’t Want This Guy’s Special Protein Treatment In Your Hair

Be My BF: Vacuum Wanker
He jumped on a roof, emptied a vacuum,masturbated and pooped in a stranger's house. Read More »
Drive-By Wank
This politician was performing drive-by wankings. Read More »
Bad Seat Mates
Busted for ejaculating into womens' hair

When you ride public transportation you’re bound to have some unsavory seat mates. It’s inevitable. I recall riding the bus once with a man carrying a giant boa constrictor in a tote bag. That was a long ride. I’ve tried to block it out but I can’t. At least three unfortunate women taking the Trimet bus in Portland had the great misfortune of riding with Jared Weston Walter, the man arrested for ejaculating into their hair. A Trimet surveillance camera captured Walter standing behind women, pleasuring himself and releasing his special protein treatment onto their heads. Well, I think that earns him the worst seat mate award. He’s also earned some charges: sex abuse, harassment, disorderly conduct, public indecency and interfering with public transportation. Keep reading »