Or as she put it, “I’m not retreating, so much as advancing in another direction.” May I be so bold as to commend the Governor for this extraordinary act of patriotism? Surely this has nothing to do with that little Vanity Fair story does it? [CNN]

Maxi Mounds, who hails from Long Island, NY, holds the Guinness World Record for “World’s Largest Augmented Breasts.” It took four surgeries for Maxi to get to her 61MMM size, according to Spike TV’s ”MANswers." She says she started “dancing” to pay for school but decided she liked being naked more than studying. She also claims that her measurements are 156MMM-26-36, but we’ll go with the more conservative breast measurement because we can’t possibly see how Maxi would be able to stand upright with 156MMM breasts. Maxi gets major attention on the web, TV, and in strip clubs, but she says the one downside to such ginormous boobs is that she can no longer sleep on her stomach. Bummer. 

In April, Brad Pitt taped a commercial with a sumo wrestler, and now it’s out. Brad plays the assistant to a sumo wrestler in this Spike Jonze-directed ad for Japanese SoftBank, a telecommunications company. We think the commercial is probably trying to say, “We’ll support you no matter what, even if we have to do the seemingly impossible, like carry a 300+ pound man when his flip-flop breaks.”

Concert promoters AEG have released this one minute video, which features Michael Jackson, just 48 hours before his death, rehearsing for his upcoming shows in London. They believe it shows that Jackson was in good health, though very thin, and was physically ready for his draining concert series. 

Whoever thought of the premise for Katherine Heigl‘s orgasm in The Ugly Truth (her awful-looking upcoming flick with Gerard Butler) should be fired.

Hot blonde woman randomly receives a pair of remote control vibrating panties in a package at her front door, puts them on for a date, which somehow turns into a business meeting, and then starts orgasming in front of all her business colleagues when a little boy stumbles upon the remote control. Um, what? Bish, please! Like we said, pink slip.

Show them how it’s done, Meg Ryan. We compiled the best orgasms we could find on the YouTubes. 

In 2000, after a Harper’s Bazaar shoot, photographers Inez van Lamsweerde and Vinoodh Matadin were hanging around with model Kate Moss, drinking and dancing. Then, Michael Jackson’s “Billie Jean” came one, and Kate started channeling the King of Pop, trying out gestures, footwork, and, of course, the infamous crotch-thrust-and-grab. And they caught it all on video. [SHOWstudio]

It’s times like these I wish I paid attention in Hebrew school. I have no idea what the Hebrew lettering says, but my guess is, “Leo DiCaprio wants to rub his GF in your face” or “This is why I’m hot.” Either way, it’s kind of a mystery what this ad is for. Supposedly, Bar Refaeli is promoting an Israeli art exhibition, but from the looks of it, she’s promoting erections. [Huffington Post]

This hilarious video by Jonathan McIntosh in genius. Watch the whole thing and, I promise, your day will be made. I love R-Patz as much as the next gal but his obsession with Bella is a little creepy. Buffy’s reaction makes more sense. 

Four out of the five “Real Housewives of New Jersey” were on “Live With Regis & Kelly” this morning (though Jerry O’Connell was filling in for Regis) and the ladies talked a lot about Danielle, who was noticeably absent. One thing is for sure—Danielle, Caroline wants to kick your ass. Clip above!

Since it’s Canada Day, I’ve been thinking about one of Canada’s greatest citizens, and, no, they’re not a canuck I’d like to f**k. I’m talking about Celine Dion. In honor of her great country, I thought it was the perfect time to (re)post this amazing tribute video, edited together by Rich at FourFour.