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Quote Of The Day: Beth Ditto’s Got Swagger

“I think if you look uncomfortable, you don’t look good. And that’s something you see in a lot of people, like running down the street in these awful shoes. And I’m just like, ‘You know, you don’t have any swagger! You look crazy! Just wear flats!’”

–Singer Beth Ditto talks about her unique style, growing up in Arkansas, and why she wants to look like a clown Keep reading »

Can You Read Cartman’s Poker Face?


Alright, I know I’m a little late to the party on this one, but this quick little snippet from “South Park” kept cracking me up during my post-Halloween hangover on Sunday. Cartman meets Lady Gaga, a match made in … God knows where. Keep reading »

MC Bangs Wants To Take U To Da Movies, Shorty


This sweet, sexy Sudanese rapper wants to take you the movies, hold your hand, and even buy you popcorn. Aww! The MC’s intentions might be innocent, but we’ll do whatever it takes to get him out of that super fly all denim outfit. No wonder, with smooth moves and rhymes, this hot MC is called Bangs! [Fark] Keep reading »

Quickies: Crying Ghost Girl & Paris Hilton Puts Out Voodoo Hit on Cristiano Ronaldo

  • Halloween means spooky, spooky ghosts are lurking, so check out what you see in the above video. [Urlesque] — Scary crying ghosts girl or figment of the collective imagination?

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Last-Minute Halloween Task! Find A Masculine Costume For Your Effeminate Son


We were so focused on the crappy Cyrus parents who let their 9-year-old daughter out of the house dressed like a sexy witch in dominatrix boots, we forgot about scads of other crappy American parents who fret about their sons playing dress-up on Halloween. Oh, The Onion, you crack us up! Keep reading »

Trailer Park: “The Wedding Song,” “Gentlemen Broncos,” “Saw VI,” And “House Of The Devil”

I know you’re swamped with Halloween preparations and haven’t even bothered to look at this week’s movies, but what are you gonna do on Sunday afternoon when you wake up hung over with a man dressed like the pope next to you and you’re wearing someone else’s wig? You’ve gotta escape somewhere, and where better than a dark, climate-controlled room full of strangers with a tub of hangover-curing carbohydrates? Here’s a look at the possibilities. Keep reading »

New Heath Ledger-Directed Music Video For N’Fa’s “Cause An Effect”

Before passing away in 2008, Heath Ledger had started a career as a music video director. One of his videos premiered in August. And a second one, a rap video for Australian N’Fa’s “Cause An Effect,” debuted today on YouTube. The video was shot on one camera in Heath’s Sydney garage shortly before his death, and it’s believed this was the last project over which he exercised complete creative control. He was childhood friends with N’Fa, aka No Fixed Abode, previously known as NFamas from the Australian hip-hop band 1200 Techniques. “The idea was to keep it very artistic so that is what we did,” N’fa said in an accompanying video. “Heath directed it really well and I was really happy with the outcome … I know Heath was happy with the work,” he added. [Reuters] Keep reading »

A Hair Raising Informercial


Too lazy to brush your own hair? No worries, help — or the worst twirled knot of your life — is on the way, for $34.95 plus shipping and handling. I don’t know what’s scarier, this rotating hair brush or the fact that the crazy abusive SlapChop guy’s commercials are still airing? [Everything Is Terrible] Keep reading »

The Genius Life Advice I Take From Kenny Rogers’ “The Gambler”

The other day I was attempting to organize my closet, but I wasn’t really getting anywhere: I have way too much stuff and I don’t like to get rid of anything, because I know the moment I do, it will come back in style. I’ve held on to almost everything, even a pair of high-waisted leather pants I bought in 1998. As I sat on my bedroom floor, surrounded by clothes that no longer fit or are past their prime, I thought: “What am I going to do?” Then, it hit me: “You gotta know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em, know when to walk away, know when to run.” Yeah, I’m quoting Kenny Rogers’ “The Gambler.” I decided that the garments that didn’t fit or hadn’t been worn in more than a year didn’t deserve a place in my closet. And those that I still wear regularly or hold some sort of sentimental value were folded and hung. Problem solved.

I don’t listen to country music. I can’t pretend I know what’s going on in the genre nowadays, and I’m still not convinced that Taylor Swift actually sings country. Yet, one of my favorite songs is “The Gambler” because it gives good life advice, even if you’re not a poker player. Keep reading »

Britney’s New Video For “3″ Is Hot


Just as suspected. Britney Spears just released the video for her new song “3,” which you’ve probably been hearing everywhere since it’s sitting at the top of the Billboard music chart. And from that little snippet where she’s being pulled back and forth by two dudes in body paint, I think it’s safe to say that the song is definitely about threesomes rather than, say, math. Sure seems like Hollywood’s gone threesome-crazy, no? Keep reading »

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