HOLY. SHIT. WHAT. THE. HELL. JUST. HAPPENED.
The season two finale of “Hannibal” was, hands down, one of the very best episodes of any TV show I have ever watched. I was stunned almost the entire time — by the beauty, by the writing, by the subtlety, by the violence, by the turn of events and by the “conclusion.” Spoilers after the jump. Keep reading »
We knew Elisabeth Moss played the president’s daughter on “The West Wing” and Jon Hamm once promised a lady a “fabulous foot massage” on a now-cancelled dating show. Thanks to this BuzzFeed, we now know that the rest of the “Mad Men” cast has been under our noses this whole time. Well, if you watched that “Buffy” spin-off “Angel,” anyway. [YouTube]
Sunday nights I have a ritual. I cook a kick ass dinner, I smoke some weed and I watch “Cosmos” high. The show is incredible all on its own, but man, it is mind-blowing when you’re stoned. The visuals are even more wondrous and the expansiveness of the universe is, like, extra, extra expansive and crazy and WHOA. But what if host Neil deGrasse Tyson took a few bong rips before jetting of in his Spaceship of the Imagination” to show us how ”fucking rad space is”? It might look something like this. [TIME]
Oof, last night’s episode of “True Tori,” one of the biggest car wrecks of a reality show I’ve ever watched, was a doozy. Quick recap: “True Tori” is a Lifetime celeb reality show about Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott, in the wake of his cheating “scandal.” Some think the cheating was concocted for the reality show, but while I think Tori and Dean are often acting their D-list balls off, the events are real. It’s a very odd show to watch, because it feels both so real and so fake all at once.
Anyway, on last night’s episode, Tori and Dean were at couples therapy and Dean was trying to explain what compelled him to cheat while he was in Toronto filming “Top Chef Canada.” Apparently he was sore about the fact that he and Tori didn’t have sex before he left on his trip, an excuse that Tori immediately called out as bullshit. As Tori explained it, they had not only been intimate in the weeks before his trip (if not the night before), but that she had “done things” she’d never done before and that the couple had paid two visits to a sex shop. Dean was quick to leave the room — because apparently talking about your sex life on TV goes too far, but putting your four kids on a show about the breakdown of your marriage does not — and viewers were left guessing what “things” Tori was talking about. My first hunch was obviously ANAL, but the two sex shop trips indicate that they needed special supplies. I don’t believe for a second that Tori and Dean have been in a seven-year marriage and have never used sexy toys in the bedroom, so the obvious conclusion — to me and echoed by Jezebel — is that they bought a strap-on and Tori pegged Dean with it. CASE CLOSED. Pegged it! (P.S. Ain’t no shame in stimulating that prostate, Dean. No judgement here!) Keep reading »
Woohoo! “The Bachelorette” is back! Andi Dorfman, last season’s tough talking DA who told Juan Pablo where to stick it, is basically this show’s ideal star. She’s pretty, she’s feisty and, most of all, she is desperate to find love and be engaged at the end. Unfortunately for her, the casting directors phoned it the fuck in this season, as over half of the dude contestants gave me MAJOR gay vibes and many of them are just straight up unattractive. Like, I’m pretty horny these days, and I would still need beer goggles to bring 95 percent of these dudebros home. If I was her, I would ask for a do over. Alas, the cards have been dealt and Chris Harrison has uttered those infamous words, “Let the journey begin!” Here’s this week’s recap — presented in superlatives! Keep reading »
Last week, the five major networks—ABC, NBC, CBS, Fox and The CW—all announced their Fall 2014 primetime schedules. In addition long-running series like “Criminal Minds” and “Law & Order: SVU” returning for another year, there are a ton of new shows that’ll be crashing the channels. Some look AH-MAH-ZING (i.e. “Gracepoint”), while others appear amazingly awful (i.e. “Jane The Virgin”). Either way, there’s going to be a ton of new things to watch this fall so we hope you start clearing your schedule—and your DVR—now.
To help weed out the small-screen studs from the duds, might we suggest the following nine series debuting on network TV this fall. Keep reading »
Activities are wonderful, but sometimes, it’s fine to want to shut the world out for a couple of days, and make some serious time for you. Don’t be afraid of FOMO, either. There will always be another party, another pub crawl, another picnic. The time you’ll spend indulging in the things you want to do, alone, are well worth it. Here’s a handy list of awesome things to do this weekend!
Keep reading »
Tyrion Lannister stands accused of a crime he didn’t commit, but his dad and sister have stacked the jury with people determined to find him guilty of King Joffrey’s murder. There’s only one man who could get to the bottom of this, find the real killer and get Tyrion the justice he deserves — Detective Elliot Stabler. DUNK DUNK!