Uzo Aduba, who plays Suzanne (aka “Crazy Eyes”) on “Orange Is The New Black,” is a remarkable actress — so remarkable that she easily could have played any of the roles on the hit Netflix show. I mean, just watch her audition tape, which features her reading for Taystee, Poussey, Red, Alex, Norma, Nicky, Pennsatucky and, of course, Piper. I’m still happy she landed the role of Suzanne, but I really enjoyed the way she channeled Lil Wayne when auditioning for Poussey. Skeet, skeet! [Funny Or Die]
Childbirth is a miracle. It’s a miracle that I intend to experience (hypothetically, in the distant future, maybe) with an epidural and as many pain-numbing drugs as they’ll give me.
Some moms-to-be go the other extreme: giving birth outdoors, literally on the floor of the fuckin’ woods, sans a doctor. And because this is America, there’s a new Lifetime reality show about them called “Born In The Wild.” Keep reading »
Sure, sure. I know what a lot of you are thinking: “Me watch ‘Pretty Little Liars?’ That’s un-possible because it’s a show for silly tween girls who shop at Forever 21, pray to the altar of One Direction and probably haven’t even gotten their period yet.” First off, we all shop at Forever 21. (Don’t lie — I recognize that floral mini skirt from the window display!) Second, you can’t tell me you wouldn’t RSVP if Harry Styles invited you on a private trip to Makeout City. Thirdly, well … I have no way of knowing the answer to that last one and, frankly, it’s none of my business, so let’s keep it moving.
However, what I DO know is that “PLL” is better, smarter and more thrilling than you think. For those unfamiliar, the ABC Family series is based on a collection of YA novels by author Sara Shepard, which was initially released in 2006. The main plot revolves around a group of teen girls — Spencer Hastings (Troian Bellisario), Hanna Marin (Ashley Benson), Aria Montgomery (Lucy Hale) and Emily Fields (Shay Mitchell) — whose friendship is torn apart after their clique’s fearless (and super-bitchy) leader, Alison DiLaurentis, goes missing and later turns up dead. However, when a mysterious entity named “A” starts harassing the remaining four by threatening to expose all their secrets, the girls reunite and vow to find out what really happened to their friend—before they suffer a similar fate. (Spoilers ahead!) Keep reading »
Activities are wonderful, but sometimes, it’s fine to want to shut the world out for a couple of days, and make some serious time for you. Don’t be afraid of FOMO, either. There will always be another party, another pub crawl, another picnic. The time you’ll spend indulging in the things you want to do, alone, are well worth it. Here’s a handy list of awesome things to do this holiday weekend!
Keep reading »
Warning: This post contains spoilers about the most recent episodes of “Game of Thrones.”
Uh oh, y’all. I’m worried. After last week’s gruesome conclusion to “Game of Thrones,” in which Oberyn was defeated by Gregor Clegan in the battle to the death that determined Tyrion Lannister’s eventual fate, I’ve started to get really, really concerned that the Imp might not make it out of this season alive. But would George R. R. Martin really kill off such a vital and beloved character? Of course he would! He’s done it time and time again! But if Evil Bitch Queen Cersei gets her wish and has Tyrion executed for the murder of King Joffrey, I will be wrecked. Wrecked!
Listen, as a semi-professional TV watcher, I’ve endured plenty of TV character deaths without shedding a tear, so this isn’t me being melodramatic. Walter White? Saw his death coming and, in fact, hoped for it. Brody on “Homeland”? Whatever, that tiny mouth annoyed me. Andrea on “The Walking Dead”? Did a jig on her fictional grave! But some TV deaths have hit me harder than others. Dear God, “Game Of Thrones,” please don’t make me add Tyrion Lannister to this list…
This piece was crossposted with permission from Happy Nice Time People.
Louis C.K. did terrible grabbing, pushing, forced kissing and more to a lady on his teevee program “Louie” and everyone was freaked out. He tried to drag her into a bedroom and it was disturbing and I can’t watch the whole clip all at once because it makes me feel weird inside in an uncomfortable fashion, and not just because fanfuckingtastic Pamela Adlon was the voice of my beloved Bobby on “King of the Hill.” Jezebel has a good thing about it that you can read and ponder.
I do not like seeing this Comedy Hero pretend-attempt to rape a lady, which is probably good, because if I were into that sort of thing, I should probably be in even more therapy. Anyway, I think “Louie” starts important conversations on important things, and it’s the closest thing we presently have to the socially conscious sitcoms of the ’70s and early ’80s (and also “Roseanne,” thank you very much) and that is why we’re talking about it right now. Keep reading »
From “You got it dude” to “Bazinga!” it’s almost like TV shows have their own special language that viewers need to understand to be in on the joke. Of course that’s part of the reason we watch in the first place. Check out this supercut of some of TV’s finest catchphrases and see how many you remember! [Laughing Squid]
There should be some sort of adult lady merit badge for sitting through four hours of “The Bachelorette” in 48 hours. I’m just saying. Let’s review last night’s episode, which featured the most emotionally manipulative date I’ve ever witnessed on this stupid show that I just can’t quit, not to mention an unexpected departure. Keep reading »
For some reason, ABC has decided that one two-hour episode a week just isn’t enough “Bachelorette.” This week, there are two two-hour episodes of my favorite reality TV dating show, one last night and then another tonight. Yay, four hours of “The Bachelorette” — how did I get so lucky? The good news is, last night’s episode was significantly less depressing than last week’s, but it was also easily among the weirdest episodes I’ve ever seen. Let’s dole out some superlatives and you’ll see what I mean! Keep reading »