I am going to take “Gersberms (Yer Gervin Mah)” by Hard n’ Phrim feat. Swedish Chef as a positive omen for my European vacation. For those of you who are not yet fluent in the language of Ermahgerd, that translates to “Goosbumps (You’re Giving Me).” This tune is inspired by the Ermahgerd Girl, who inspired the Ermahgerd meme, which brought me more joy, perhaps, than ehrnytherng ehrlse this yehr. [TheFW]
A survey done at through a UK dating site found the top ten breakup lines men and women use. Dating pros, I’m sure you’ve either heard these all or used them yourself. I feel the world’s longest eye roll coming on. And P.S. This is a wake-up call, we need to start coming up with some more original ways to dump each other because we suck at it. Find out what they are after the jump. For extra fun, take a shot for each line you’ve heard or used. I predict you’ll be wasted by the end of the list. Keep reading »
Theoretically, winning the lottery should be a wonderful thing. Who wouldn’t want $100 million in their pocket right now? But time and time again it’s been proven that all those millies can ruin even the best-intentioned, most giving, God-loving folk. And also the ones who blow their jackpot on cocaine and prostitutes. And everyone else between. Here are ten incredibly sad, more-tragic-than-Shakespeare stories where people went from gutter to glory to gutter again. Many of them went on to say (if they even survived to tell the tale), “I wish I never would have won.” Which means you there, dear reader, are one lucky sonofabitch for losing the Lottery.
Thanksgiving is just around the corner, which means in between gorging on pumpkin pie and crying in the bathroom about something terrible your uncle said, it’s time to give thanks for the multitude of blessings in our lives. We’re pretty good about being grateful for all the usual suspects–health, family, career–but sometimes we overlook all the little things that make life awesome. You know, like a perfectly timed commute or the arrival of a warm bread basket at a restaurant. Read on to see 50 random things we’re so thankful for, and feel free to add your own in the comments! Keep reading »
Dan Savage suggests fucking before dinner. And yeah, that’s probably the best policy when it comes to huge holiday meals like Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner. But if you can’t make that happen for whatever reason (and there are plenty of reasons, like FAMILY STRESS), you might find yourself in an emotional place where you need to seek solace in the comfort of sex after the biggest meal of your life. If that’s the place you find yourself in, or if holidays just make you horny, there are ways to work around that five-pound food baby in your stomach. Some tips for post-huge dinner sex after the jump. Keep reading »
No, I have not read the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy and I don’t plan to. Maybe I’ll read it like 50 years from now when I’m nursing-home bound and desperate for some entertainment. But right now, the universe is so saturated with everything Fifty Shades that I refuse. What can I say, I tend to rebel against trends. I’ve been that way since pre-school when all the girls said their favorite color was pink, so, I said mine was purple because I was annoyed by the conformity. But this is not about me. This is about Fifty Shades of Grey and how I suspect it’s ruining the world.
This week, my worst fears were confirmed when a British couple cited “unreasonable differences” over Fifty Shades of Grey as a cause for their divorce. Stated simply: they are divorcing because of a poorly-penned book. I rest my case.
But if you need more evidence, please click through and see how E.L. James’ “Twilight” fan-fiction- turned-BDSM-erotica-novel is destroying lives.