I’ve been reflecting more on why I felt such deep shame while watching “The Bachelor” finale the other night. I think part of it has to do with the way they talk about the bachelorettes. It’s like they are stock characters. Well, I guess they are. It’s television. But in real life as well, I find myself irked by a certain subset of commonly used phrases to describe women. They are just kind of one-dimensional, stereotypical and well, annoying. After the jump, the female descriptors that make my skin crawl. Keep reading »
Guess what? It’s March 14th, aka 3.14, aka PI DAY. Pi, as you probably remember from high school geometry, is the ratio of a circle’s circumference to its diameter. Pi is one of the sexiest math concepts in the game, because it’s huge (recent calculations have mapped it out to 5 trillion digits) and poetic and mysterious. My friends and I have been celebrating this sacred holiday for the past few years. Want to honor the almighty pi? Here are some ways to get in on the fun… Keep reading »
I have written before about how much I enjoy living alone. I got my own apartment shortly after my fiancé and I broke up; though I did very much enjoy cohabiting with him — having roommates in college and in my first years in NYC, not so much — I quickly discovered that living alone was so much better. While I am a big believer in living together before marriage and know I will live with a partner again, it will take a mighty special person to get me to break up with my bachelorette pad.
I recognize I am in a privileged position, being able to afford my own place, especially in New York. But if you ever get the chance to live alone — and this is certainly more economically feasible in other parts of the country where rent isn’t so mind-bogglingly high — you need to seize the opportunity. Living alone has presented me with some awesome perks that I think may sway you to someday ditch the roommate or cohabiting BF. Keep reading »
I’ve been here before. On this date. The movie was just as corny, the guy just as funny, and our drinks just as bubbly. Welcome to the Groundhog Day of dating – when you have the same date over and over again – with the same guy. I’m not complaining. I like this guy. You see, he’s unavailable. But that’s ok, I’m unavailable, too. We met on Unavailable.com. Our paths happened to collide at mutually complicated times — we were both “in between” everything: jobs, neighborhoods, leases. But being distracted is more fun when you’re distracted with someone else. Without Rafael*, I would’ve never discovered the full potential of On-Demand cable, the 212 new indie songs (which I’m currently listening to), nor would I have ever sat through an entire screening of “The Exorcist” for the sole purpose of my “artistic development.” Sometimes a guy comes along — even if it is for four minutes or four months — and stirs your world. After all, dating a Mr. Unavailable has its own special brew of perks. Find out what they are after the jump. Keep reading »
As a fan of reality TV competition shows, I always, without fail, root for the villain. The villain is usually the smartest and most strategic, attributes that entertain and impress me far more than physical strength or niceness. Stick me in front of an episode of any reality TV show and I will be cheering for the Richard Hatch of the group, the person 10 steps ahead of the others who are too busy braiding each other’s hair to notice.
That’s why I am such a big fan of Courtney, the mean-spirited model on this season of “The Bachelor.” Because even though she ‘s fond of using dated catchphrases like “Winning!”, Courtney is the only one who seems to recognize that after 16 seasons (plus an additional eight of “The Bachelorette”) of final roses, failed engagements and broken hearts, “The Bachelor” is a competition and that winning very rarely results in finding true, lasting love. As a result, Courtney has played “The Bachelor” game with very little regard for the actual “prize” in the end, and watching her has been a master class in manipulating a man. Here’s how she’s done it. Keep reading »
Forget Christmas, forget Halloween, forget the Fourth of July … Daylight Savings Time is officially the best day of the year. I’m not sure why our government doesn’t recognize its awesomeness and give us a day off to celebrate that we made it the eff through winter, but maybe it’s not too late for the GOP to add that to their platform. Because if you think about it, Daylight Savings brings us so much joy — when we turn our clocks forward tomorrow, Sunday, March 11, we’ll wake up and it will be spring, people, it will be spring. Read more …
Allow me to be all at once bold and competitive: I’ve got the worst gas of anyone you’ve ever met. If society was somehow different, and my … gift, let’s call it, was better valued, I would be your Queen of Farts. I would command attention, take down armies. I would redraw the lines of femininity. I would be worshiped and adored. None of this is likely to happen, though, is it? So here I am, in this world, in this society, in which (I dislike the words “gassy” and “farty”) a gastrointestinally-challenged woman has a tough row to hoe. Consider the sheer, exhausting effort that goes into covering up your scent. My plight: I’ve got an ass like a machine gun, people. And it’s on a mission to ruin my life. Keep reading »
Smooth guys are overrated. And while not every awkward guy is amazing, as a group, they have my vote. I’m so confident about them, I married one. On our first date he stood in front of me, cradling a giant sunflower, and said, “I knew this was going to be awkward, so I’ve been practicing standing awkwardly in front of you.” He was perfect.
I listen as my friends tell me sad stories about the cool, cocky, fiery, loud guys they date. The guys they fight with other girls over. The guys who somehow always end up ghosting them, just when they’re starting to fall. The guys who play in bands or have a signature shoe style. The guys who are never awkward and would never, ever be played by Hugh Grant in a movie about their life. I bite my lip. I don’t want to be preachy. But really, inside, I’m dying to recommend they date someone, well, more awkward. After the jump, why they’re the best. Keep reading »
Mothers have the unique ability to annoy us in a way that no other person can. The smallest gesture, the most subtle glance, the most seemingly innocuous comment is enough to send us into a fit of madness. Why? Because we understand her thought process, her subtext, what she really thinks of our new haircut … even though she doesn’t say it. Her belabored sigh is enough to tip us off. But we know that if mom ever stopped sending us 5-10 chain emails a week (even though we’ve repeatedly asked her not to), we would miss those chain emails. We’d miss them dearly. After the jump, we take a moment to appreciate all the little the things our mothers do that drive us nuts. Keep reading »
Being gorgeous sounds pretty great. It sounds like exactly what a woman might want to be. When you’re gorgeous, the world is supposedly your oyster. Whatever that means. More like, the world is your lobster, because people want to buy you expensive stuff. But is being incredibly hot really all that it’s cracked up to be? I think not! You look shocked. But read on. I will give you 10 solid reasons why I’m glad I’m not a perfect 10. Keep reading »