A couple of years after my fiancé and I broke up, I received a friend request from him on Facebook. I guess it made sense. While I’d decided that being real world friends didn’t quite work for me, I wasn’t exactly hating him either. So when I saw the friend request, I momentarily thought about accepting it. It would be the mature thing to do, right? Wrong. The mature thing to do is whatever moves you forward into a peaceful, calm, and happy existence. And looking at my ex’s new life wouldn’t help with that. So I did not accept.
Some couples are instant and true friends after their breakup. I don’t happen to know any of them, but rumor has it they exist. If those ex-couples want to be Facebook friends, so be it. But the rest of us should defriend, at least for awhile. Here are 6 of the lamest excuses for not unfriending your ex on Facebook.
1. I want to see if he says anything bad about me. Ahh, so you’re conducting your own public relations control campaign by monitoring your ex’s wall. Well, here’s a thought: If your ex is gauche enough to share anything negative about you with all of his Facebook friends, then that reflects badly on only one person: Him. Read more …
Yesterday, I finally did something that I had been meaning to do for awhile: I walked into a Crunch Gym and canceled my membership. Which I had been paying for, for a year. And have never used once. Like, hadn’t even picked up my membership card. Pathetic.
When I think about how much money I completely wasted, I want to punch myself. Alas, it’s not the first time I’ve practically flushed my hard-earned cash down the toilet. I have made some truly stupid spending decisions over the years, and in an effort to never be so frivolously lazy again, I am going to share them with you. Feel free to make me feel better by the ways in which you have completely wasted money in the comments! Keep reading »
Happy International Left-Handers Day from yours truly, Ami Angelowicz, proud lefty. There are a bunch of things you already know about lefties — like we’re creative, intelligent, have good hand-eye coordination and tend to have crappier immune systems. Check to all of these, except for the hand-eye coordination. That trait seemed to have skipped me entirely. I was supposed to be good at tennis, dammit! Not even close. But there are other things that I’m good at (and bad at). And even though they’re not traditionally linked to being left-handed, that’s what I attribute them to. After the jump, five things I blame on being a south paw. Keep reading »
Kate Spade has it out for me.
That is the only possible explanation why they could have hired Garance Doré, a French style blogger and photographer, to design pieces for their fall line. Doré’s whimsical doodles are all over dresses, bags, and even an umbrella and iPhone case. The prices are as WTF as Kate Spade prices usually are, but that Joie De Vivre shirt is so damn cute I might just go searching the couches for loose change.
Above, my favorite picks from the Garance Doré for Kate Spade line!
Happy Saturday, folks! Did you hear? Mitt Romney has announced his running mate for the presidential election — Congressman Paul Ryan (R-WI). Let’s get to know him, shall we? Keep reading »
This morning, as the dull ache of cramps woke me from my slumber, I realized something kind of momentous. I have had my period for exactly 20 years. I mean, almost exactly, because I don’t know the exact date or time that my Aunt Flow first came to visit, but I do know it was at the beginning of the school year, before I turned 13. I turn 33 in November, so, yep, that makes for 20 bloody years. That’s a lot of tampons. Over the years, I’ve learned a few things about myself specifically in relation to tampons and their usage. Let me share them with you. Keep reading »
I want to climb into the womb of “TLC” and live there forever. The network really, really gets it. Um, did anyone see the preview for “Abby & Brittany,” the new reality show about the conjoined twins? Holy crap, TLC. I bow down. Anyhow, last night’s two-episode premiere of “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” was more epic than I expected. Not only were most of my pressing questions answered, but I learned things I never expected to know in this lifetime. Bless you, Boo Boos, for how you’ve enriched my life. This is definitely my new favorite show. Bottom line. Here are the six very important things you might have missed on last night’s episodes of “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo.” Be prepared to have your mind blown. (Plus! Bonus clips of Alana on a new episode of “Toddlers and Tiaras,” which also aired last night.) Keep reading »
We all go through dry spells. We all know what it’s like. So let’s give ourselves permission to laugh about those moments when you realize it has been entirely too long since you last had sex. Here are 15 signs. Keep reading »
Big tits and August don’t mix. In this hot hot heat, sweating bullets could kill your good looks, no thanks to gross breast sweat. I once had a dude dip a finger in my cleavage on a 100-degree day only to retract his hand in horror. Oh strapless bra, you sold me down a river, literally! But since then, I’ve learned to beat the heat and you can too. So, don’t let your melons become watermelons this summer. Save yourself with these tips… Keep reading »
Every phone I’ve ever owned has met a tragic and untimely death. Whether it’s the toilet, the concrete, the washing machine, a sandy beach, or a spilled glass of juice, I am an expert at breaking cell phones, so when I splurged on a fancy new Android a few weeks ago, I vowed things would be different. And for awhile, they were: I cradled it gently against my ear; I never touched the screen when my hands were messy; I tucked it carefully into its very own pocket in my purse. And then, a few days ago, I dropped it on the concrete while taking a nice, slow-paced stroll through the park. Looking down at that cracked screen, at all my hard work gone to waste, I had an epiphany: there must be 50 ways to break your cell phone. With apologies to Paul Simon, here they are… Keep reading »