Ehhhh, no. As if the Brad-Pitt-and-Angelina-Jolie-designed jewelry line wasn’t, um, hideous enough, now Alicia Keys, whom I love (as a singer), has launched her own jewelry line, which is called The Barber’s Daughters, and is also totes heinous. It’s so CRAFTY. [Pipeline]

Sure, a tent-coat combo sounds like an utterly ridiculous piece of clothing (it sort of looks more like a scarf than a coat, if you ask me), but these days who wouldn’t want one? I mean, hello? Just think about it: We are smack in the middle of sample sale season. What does that mean? Many long lines on sidewalks in not-so-nice weather—who wants to stand in rain/hail/cold winds when you can stroll up in your coat-tent, pitch the thing and spend those waiting hours out of the elements? And, with the newest “Twilight” installment upon us, all I’m seeing are hordes of cold potential moviegoers camped out in front of movie theaters waiting for their chance to see the vamps tomorrow. Wouldn’t a tent-coat make those nights spent on line more pleasurable? So, I ask you again, who wouldn’t want one? [Inventor Spot]

Judging from oh, say, all those three wolf moon shirts that keep popping up all over the place, wolves are (still) hot, hot, hot right now! They must be if international “it” girl Daisy Lowe wore this fetching (har) hat to Rihanna’s “it” concert in London this evening. Being complete sheep (ha), we scoured the web in search of this cap, because we simply had to have it. So the bad news is we stumbled upon a few sort-of-but-not-really similar versions at Ecrater and, um, the Minnesota Historical Society, but go figure, they’re waaay too scary-looking. The good news is we finally started to wonder why the hell we were looking for a hat like this in the first place and stopped doing so immediately. Whew, that was a close one.

And you thought you were testing the limits of devotion when you asked your guy to pick up some tampons for you. Here’s the story of a man who waited in line for 12 hours with his Jimmy Choo-obsessed girlfriend so she could be the first to score a pair just in from the hotly anticipated H&M collection: ” ... while her fiance Will, 28, filled a flask with tea, donned his thermals, packed a rucksack with blankets and dug out a golf umbrella and a couple of camping chairs, Kate focused on the things that really mattered – the stuff bearing the legend ‘Jimmy Choo for H&M’,” writes the Daily Mail. Apparently, when this London branch of the chain opened its doors, Will wasn’t the only boyfriend doing some shopping. “Rob, a 26-year-old graduate student from Texas, had queued since 11pm for his girlfriend Brie’s Christmas present and maybe a couple of bags for eBay.”

Win a prize, cop a feel! Claw vending machines in Japan have been known to offer bizarre-o prizes like live crabs or turtles, cigarettes, underwear, power drills and packages of American $2 notes—so, by comparison, these busty stress relief balls seem vaguely normal. Or not. [Inventorspot]

We don’t mean to sound harsh here, but it’s probably wise for Kristen Stewart to buckle down and get a stylist, or at least replace the one she’s presently working with, if she has one. She’s been looking a bit off at “New Moon” events all week, but when it comes to this getup, we can remain silent no more. Look closely at this very odd dress and notice the ill fit, unflattering silhouette and see-through panels that reveal her panty line and side boobs. What in the hell is going on here? Yes, the sheer trend is, like, a thing now, but it’s definitely one of those proceed-with-caution trends. We’re not even sure The Fashion Peacekeepers could find anything positive to say about this frock. It’s just puzzling.

I’ve heard of some strange lingerie in my time, but the Nice Cup in Bra, comin’ at ya straight outta Japan, is probably one of the more bizarre. That green bustier? It magically transforms into a putting green. In Japan, there’s a golfing boom among young women—“those women always on the go”—who, it seems, must sate their putting urges on the spot. The deets: “The mat is about 1.5 meters (5 feet) in length and has (unsurprisingly) two cups to aim for [and] small pockets for holding golf tees and scoring pencils.” If you make a whole-in-one, the bra exclaims, “Nice in!” The miniskirt turns into a flag that tells everyone to be quiet while you focus on the green. [Examiner]

I never thought I’d be sitting here today defending the Snuggie, but after coming across this blatant rip-off called the “KN Kozy,” I feel like someone has to stand up for this gross injustice. Then again, upon closer inspection, we’re strangely drawn to Karen Neuberger’s ultra-plush copy. At $40 with a satin ribbon trim and “attractive gift tag included!” it’s like a fancier, new and improved version. Go ahead, ask anyone who has actually ordered the original blanket with sleeves and they will tell you the fabric is way lacking. Also, as Amelia points out, this oddly chic getup looks like something style icon Tilda Swinton might wear on the red carpet. Since it’s backless, she’ll want to be careful not to turn around and expose herself. [Karen Neuberger]

Easily accessible these pants are not. Croatian designer Damir Doma certainly thinks outside of the box though, we’ll give him that much. [superfuture]

Office temperatures are spastic. During the summer it’s like an arctic chill of air conditioning, and come winter, you’ll do anything for more heat. I’m certainly the first one to snuggle under piles of sweaters and scarves, but these gloves might be just a little too much. Hook them up to a USB cord, and they heat your hands—sort of like the butt warmers in cars. A pair of hand-warmers with faux fur trim will cost you $27.75, but if your fingers are consistently freezing, this may be a great option. I’m not sold yet, but ask me again in a few months when the wind chill in Manhattan is below freezing. [CNET]

I love a zipper on my jeans. Way better than button fly. Hell, I’ll even take the odd zipper on a pair of shoes, or even those zipper earrings everyone was loving last year. But zippers on the side of these booty shorts in a style that has been dubbed “Boy Candy”? Well, everyone has their limits. [Inventor Spot]

As a kid, did you ever have those plastic fingertips that let you pretend you had long, red nails? This finger ring by Delfina Delettrez kind of reminds us of that. Except this is the version for rich kids. Or something.

The silver accessory also has a customizable element—it comes with a bottle of nail polish, or you can paint your own color on to the nail. Red! Pink! Glitter! Have all the fun you want, and just change it out when you’re done. Hey, wait—doesn’t that mean that our own nails are customizable, too? Huh. And why did we want this ring again? [Style.com]

Why hello there, Pete Wentz, glad you’re here. We have something rather important to discuss with you. It has come to our attention that you’re wearing far too much makeup, even if your intention was to make it “pop” on the red carpet. In fact, we’ve tolerated your guyliner ways for a long time now, but when you show up to the party wearing more paint than your girl and your name is not David Bowie, then that’s when you know you need to shut it down, my friend. The heavy pancake foundation (in the wrong shade for your skin tone we might add), the extravagant eye makeup, the shimmery lip gloss—it’s all too much to take in. Now go get yourself some industrial-strength makeup remover and get the hell out of here.

Apparently, Hollywood pressure can really get to a (spice) girl. Mel B is married to some producer dude who had something to do with some new movie called, “Bad Lieutenant: Port Of Call New Orleans” that we will likely never see. It premiered last night. Whatever. But The Daily Mail reports that when she realized “she would be sharing the red carpet with A-listers Eva Mendes and Charlize Theron, she knew she would have to go the extra mile to get attention.” Oddly, she kind of went the opposite of an extra mile and uh, fell a little short. Seriously. Tragically. Short. [The Daily Mail]

Sure, critics say Vogue has lost touch with today’s modern women, but uh, you kinda have to see it (via video) to believe it. In this edition of “60 Seconds To Chic,” host Louise Roe explores how to wear the winter boot. And boy, is it full of gems! There’s the batcrackers your-boss-will-think-you’re-insane first look that she suggests is “good to go to the office,” a screaming green fur Russian cap served up with the sunny, helpful, “Don’t be scared to wear a hat!” and, finally, bare legs and an evening dress paired with wild, ‘80s-style Sorrel boots for an ensemble that says you are a very practical girl. You’re also freezing to death. [Fashionista]

In our digital age, that old hand-to-mouth trick to check your breath is so passé. (Plus unreliable if you just caressed your hands with some scented lotion. Ahh, guava patchouli breath ... mmm. Kidding.) That’s why there’s this Date Breath Checker, a hilarious Japanese (of course) gadget that reads the levels of grossness on your breath. Helping you prep for that first date kiss, all you do is blow into the purse-sized device, and it analyzes your odor through a series of very technical smiley/frowny faces. Happy icon? That sweet crème brulée did you good. Sad face? Why did you even suggest Indian in the first place?

Apparently, the buyers at New Zealand boutique Superette think the clothes they sell are so bitchin’ they’d still look cute on a dead girl. Congrats on turning the statement “I wouldn’t be caught dead in that!” on its head, but we think your ad is a bit tacky (and creepy), guys. Let’s take a look at the implications of this particular ad, shall we?

Hallelujah! We interrupt your moment of worrying about impending crow’s feet and forehead creases to distract you with yet another aging “ailment” that you need to start fixating on ASAP! Whether you’ve considered it or not, your cleavage has the potential to get old and crinkly, just like the rest of you! First on the menu—for all you mild cases out there—we’ve got a backwards-looking, cup-less bra (pictured) that promises to prevent those unfortunate chest creases you get while sleeping. Order La Decollette here immediately, because let’s face it: It’s a great holiday gift for you, your mom and grandma. But that’s not all!

Was your neighborhood overrun with Lady Gaga impersonators this Halloween? For all those crazy fans out there, the wig-wearing diva is giving up a strand of her real hair to make their dreams come true. She’s selling a deluxe box set—complete with the book of Gaga, “The Fame” album, eight new songs, 3D glasses, and to top it all off, a lock of her hair. The price tag on this Gaga-licious item is $114.98. No word on where the money is going, but we’re pretty sure it’ll be added to the funds for her crazy costumes. We say this is way creepy. It was weird enough when Elvis sold his hair, but oh wait, he was dead already and he is also the King. Thoughts? [Mirror]

My Facebook page has been taken over by FarmVille updates. So-and-so just harvested their stock! Your friend just sold his wares! Help your neighbor scare off crows! And on, and on, and on. The game is sweeping the social networking world and, apparently, running people’s lives. One man gets up in the middle of the night in order to harvest his crops. A husband made his hungry, pregnant wife wait while he tended to his raspberries. Conversations revolve around FarmVille coins and experience rankings. Really?!!