Hallelujah! It’s Friday, and that means one thing: Happy Hour. You go out after work, the boss treats everybody to a round and you loosen up a bit. You spend a lot of time with your co-workers, and you always enjoy having a few beers on a Friday evening. But is there a line? After the jump, read more and tell us how you act when you’re out with your fellow employees. Keep reading »
Recently, I put myself in a tangle that I will be the first to admit was stupid: I took someone’s bait when I just should have kept my head down and my mouth shut. And this chafed like a subcutaneous rash. Ugh … you did it again! You need to have more control over yourself!
I sat with this for a few days, wondering why I keep letting myself keep doing this. One of the things I admire about my boyfriend is when emotions are running high, he can just check out — deescalating a situation like a good police officer. Me? I take that bait. I escalate. And you know what? It wasn’t worth engaging in. The woman who was baiting me was just being a bully. She was trying to intimidate me and demarcate lines of power, which pissed me off. I’m not keen on authority that I don’t respect.
Then something brilliant occurred to me last night: I can’t control petty behavior and I can’t control what other people’s defense mechanisms are, but I can change the way I see situations like this. And the way I see it now is I don’t need to be a bitch to get what I want. Keep reading »
This originally posted yesterday at 6:30 pm, but then there was some sort of snafu and a bunch of text deleted. Anyway, here’s yesterday’s Lady News, uh, today. — Editor Amelia
It’s not always us ladies who have to deal with Bill or Betsy’s TMI convos at the water cooler: Men filed 16.4 percent of all sexual harassment claims in 2009, up from 15.4 percent of all claims in 2006, according to the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission. Employment lawyers told The Wall Street Journal that they are increasingly seeing “locker room” behavior, like raunchy talk or sexual innuendo, in sexual harassment claims from men. But experts say some men are reluctant to report it because they don’t want to look like they’re weak, whiny or, strangely, gay, for reporting the abuse of power. Of course, women still file the overwhelming majority of sexual harassment claims at work. But the fact that guys deal with this crap at work, too, proves that sexual harassment is not a case of a woman “encouraging” or “asking for it.” [Wall Street Journal] Keep reading »
I used to be defined by one singular character: ambition. As early as 9th grade, I knew that I wanted to be a journalist who wrote long-form investigative articles. And for nine or 10 years, everything about my life was focused around that one goal: where I went to school, how I spent my “free” time, who my friends were, even whom I dated. It’s not an exaggeration to say my drive consumed my life — and I was perfectly OK, even pleased, with that. I seriously believed that at long last I would finally be happy when people bought magazines with my writing in them.
The thing is, ambition for ambition’s sake turns out to be a hollow way to live one’s life. It’s a means to an end, of course, but considering that the target you are shooting for is constantly shifting, it can also be exhausting. Don’t misunderstand me: I’m proud of my accomplishments — articles I’ve written, interviews I’ve conducted, maybe a few lives I’ve affected. But if I could go back in time and change a few things, I just might do it.
And the first thing that I would change? I would not have dated so many men whose careers I envied. Life is hard enough when you’re putting unreasonable expectations on yourself to succeed, but it’s damn near impossible when you’re comparing yourself to someone you’re sleeping with. Keep reading »
We’ve learned a few things from watching Anna Wintour on TV specials and in “The September Issue.” So it’s not at all surprising that filmmaker R.J. Cutler, the man behind the documentary, picked up a few pointers from the Vogue editor-in-chief during the eight months he filmed her at work. Keep reading to find out four of Anna’s professional philosophies. Since they helped Anna become the powerful woman she is today, we’re sure that applying them to your 9-to-5 will get you promoted. Keep reading »
You’ve already heard the upsetting news that folks whose name starts with the letter “D” live shorter lives. But now I need to have a chat with all of you named Andy or Sarah. If you’re actually at work right now, and not out pretending to be sick, you may want to make sure no one is spying on you in your cubicle before you read on. Keep reading »
I felt a swell of pride when I heard about an intern at Grazia magazine after my own heart. This young genius, who was sent out regularly to buy fat-free lattes for the beauty department, revealed a little secret on her last day at the magazine. She had been buying them full-fat lattes all along. I can only imagine the look on their faces as they ran to the bathroom to vomit. This girl is a hero as far as I’m concerned. I hope interns of Anna Wintour types everywhere are listening because I can’t think of anything worse than being an abused intern. In fact, I have a checkered intern past of my own … [Guardian] Keep reading »
Creativity is the cure for unemployment. This summer, despite being a relatively successful z-list commercial model and actor in Montreal, Quebec, I hit the Sahara desert of dry spells. Needing to make rent, I accepted a position as a part-time cleaning lady for my building’s superintendent and cleaned vacant apartments, stinky stairwells, and dusty, dirty garages. My new role was not the brightest hour of my professional life; catwalks, callbacks and cash, industrial cleaning was not. In between mopping, shoveling, and hauling ashes from old fireplaces like a bedraggled Cinderella, I applied to as many gigs on Craigslist as I could, hoping to find something paying more than my $12-an-hour grueling summer job. Keep reading »
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