For years, the American people have bled, died and fought to survive under a terrible reign. Our government finally had the opportunity to do something about this menace from the north … and they messed it up.
Yes, the White House has responded to the official We The People petition to deport Justin Bieber and revoke his green card. Despite 270,000 signatures, their answer was “no comment.” Keep reading »
Sure, Syria might have released chemical weapons on its own people this week. BUT I WANNA HEAR MORE ABOUT THE WHITE HOUSE’S NEW PUPPY GAAAAAAH! Here’s President Obama in an exclusive interview with CNN, talking about the new puppy Sunny (a Portuguese water dog like their four-year-old dog, Bo) and her accidents around the White House. Don’t worry, Hillary. They’ll be cleaned up by 2016. [Huffington Post]
Bo has a sister! The White House announced on Monday that they have added a furry new friend to their brood, a female puppy named Sunny! A Portuguese water dog just like Bo, Sunny was born in Michigan in June and, said the White House, ”is the perfect little sister for Bo – full of energy and very affectionate – and the First Family picked her name because it fit her cheerful personality.” Check out an adooooorable video of Sunny and Bo frolicking on the White House lawn after the jump! [White House] Keep reading »
“We, the undersigned, would like the Obama administration to recognize the need for a new national anthem, one that even a decade after its creation, is still hot and fresh out the kitchen. America has changed since Francis Scott Key penned our current anthem in 1814. Since then, we have realized that after the show, it’s the afterparty, and that after the party, it’s the hotel lobby, and–perhaps most importantly–that ’round about four, you’ve got to clear the lobby, at which point it’s strongly recommended that you take it to the room and freak somebody. President Obama: we ask you to recognize the evolution of this beautiful country and give us an anthem that better suits the glorious nation we have become.”
––This is the actual text of a petition to the Obama Administration to change the national anthem to R. Kelly’s 2003 hit “Ignition (Remix).” Only 95,000 more signatures are needed to guarantee an official response from the White House. Let’s do this. [Whitehouse via Buzzfeed]
Big Bird flew up from Sesame Street to help Michelle Obama hunt for healthy snacks in the White House kitchen as part of her Let’s Move! campaign.
Another video about how much fun (?) it is to exercise, after the jump… Keep reading »
Attention, American public: The White House has seen your petitions about building a Death Star, investigating the feasibility of building the Enterprise, and giving each state an official Pokémon. In one case they even responded in a particularly awesome way. But now they have another message for you: Cut it out, guys. It’s getting tired.
To that end, We the People—whitehouse.gov’s official petition site–is upping the number of signatures required for an official White House response from 25,000 to 100,000. Read more…
The Administration shares your desire for job creation and a strong national defense, but a Death Star isn’t on the horizon. Here are a few reasons:
- The construction of the Death Star has been estimated to cost more than $850,000,000,000,000,000. We’re working hard to reduce the deficit, not expand it.
- The Administration does not support blowing up planets.
- Why would we spend countless taxpayer dollars on a Death Star with a fundamental flaw that can be exploited by a one-man starship?
– The White House’s response to a citizens’ petition to build a Death Star (yes, like the one in “Star Wars”), which gathered more than 34,000 signatures, is all sorts of amazing. The response — penned by Paul Shawcross, Chief of the Science and Space Branch at the White House Office of Management and Budget — goes on to laud the country’s many other advancements in space science and encourages the petitioners to do their part in enjoying the future, by “pursuing a career in a science, technology, engineering or math-related field.” And also, he says, “Remember, the Death Star’s power to destroy a planet, or even a whole star system, is insignificant next to the power of the Force.” Best response ever, this is. [WhiteHouse.gov]
As if Sheryl Crow couldn’t get any more badass. Growing up to the tunes of “Soak Up the Sun” and “If It Makes You Happy,” I’m pretty psyched about Crow’s newly released song, “Woman In The White House.”
After endorsing Obama back in 2008, Crow thinks that “after 230-something years of waiting [for a woman in the White House,] it’s way overdue.” Crow belts out her belief that women will be the one to “clean up Capitol Hill.” I wonder whether she has any particular woman in mind — perhaps even herself? [Huffington Post]
Say you wanted to buy the White House — just how much money might you need? According to the latest estimate, you’d need $284.9 million dollars. That’s up nearly $5 million more than it was worth four years ago.
But if you buy the White House, what are you getting, exactly? Keep reading »
Fun with data about sexual fantasies! A new survey found that 33 percent of American women have had a sexual fantasy which took place at the Eiffel Tower. Can you blame them? It’s a sexy structure. Fun fact: Some woman was so taken with the the Eiffel Tower that she married it. Her name is Erika La Tour Eiffel. She consummated her marriage by straddling the tower naked. So hands off, ladies. Keep reading »