Fun game time! Goes in the mouth, wraps around the tongue, looks like a fleshlight. What the heck is this thing? The only clue that I will give you is that this it is not a sex toy. Find out the answer after the jump. Keep reading »
Your evening guest might think twice about banging you in these beds…
Imagine a car that runs on tap water and never breaks down or needs replacement parts — would you drive it? We forgot to mention that it’s shaped like a giant clown penis.
Humans are funny creatures — we tend to shun any product, no matter how useful, if it makes us look ridiculous. That’s why virtually none of you own … Keep reading »
I’m assuming this only works on people who can’t chew gum and jerk off at the same time. [The Clearly Dope] Keep reading »
Protect your iPhone from possible damage and indulge your family jewel fetish at the same time with a case adorned with dangling testes. Because, as the creators of Phoneballs put it, “Whether male or female, chances are you have been touched by a pair of balls in your life…. don’t you want to touch ‘em back?” [$15, Phoneballs]
[UPDATE: Yeah, I originally called it a 4G. I'm still using a rotary, what can I say?] Keep reading »
This slogan is more effective than even the ol’ right hand. Hand sanitizer really is the perfect addition to any masturbation station. But be careful you don’t get this squirt bottle confused with your lube! [CVXN] Keep reading »
Shiseido sells a line of shampoo and body washes in Japan that touts “mother’s milk” as a component. Ew! Do these Shiseido products really have breast milk in them? Turns out they don’t (phew), but rather, the beauty company is trying to sell “the concept of mother’s milk,” which apparently means pulling nutrients from other sources that also happen to be found in breast milk.
So, uh, isn’t that still kind of strange? The idea of getting the benefit of mother’s milk (even if it isn’t the real thing)? Let’s hope this isn’t the beginning of an uncomfortable trend—breast milk for beauty products. [Inventor Spot] Keep reading »
Are your p**sy lips looking a little dull and lifeless? Do you wish they had the rosy hue of the day you were born? Now they can! My Pink Button “genital cosmetic colorant” will restore the pink back in your tired, old, used-up ladyflower! The product comes in four shades, cleverly named after the labia of Marilyn Monroe, Bettie Page, Ginger Rogers, and Audrey Hepburn, natch! My Pink Button only costs $29.95, so what are you waiting for? Your vaginal lips are ready for a whole new look! [via Broadsheet] Keep reading »
There are certain places I expect the President of the U.S. to pop up: CNN, The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, etc. Since President Obama is unusually stylish, it’s no surprise that he and the super glam Michelle regularly grace the cover of non-news magazines. The one place I was not expecting to see the handsome face of our fearless leader: a dildo. Oh yes, he’s really got his own stimulus package. Personally, I’ll pass. Luckily for those of us who find that politics rarely leads to fun in the bedroom, but want to show their patriotism in an unusual manner, there is plenty of oddball Obama merchandise out there. Keep reading »
Oprah may be responsible for “vajayjay” — slang for “vagina,” for those of you living under a rock — entering the English lexicon, but she doesn’t own the trademark. That explains why VJJ Enterprises — which has filed a trademarking application — was able to manufacture the first product ever featuring the term. The best part? It’s a visor. For your vagina. Marketed as similar to a jock strap, the Vaj-j Visor is described as a “protective vaginal shield designed to help protect a woman’s inner vulva area inner labia, clitoris, and vaginal opening.” For sports? Actually, the Vaj-j Visor is supposed to be used during grooming activities, like Brazilian and bikini waxing, depilatories and shaving, hair coloring, tanning or spa treatments. Your vaginal muscles help keep the visor in place. All this contact with your naughty bits means that each visor needs to be tossed out after use. Visit the company’s website to find out how to buy it wholesale. [Vaj-J Visor via Mother Jones] Keep reading »