Santa Ana, California, woman Catherine Kieu Becker got really mad at her husband Glen for having an “inappropriate relationship” with someone. So mad that she drugged him, tied him to a bed with nylon ropes, and using a 10-inch knife, cut off his penis. She then threw the penis down the garbage disposal and turned it on, mutilating it beyond repair. Doctors were, not surprisingly, unable to reattach the organ, though Glen has now recovered and is out of the hospital.
On Monday, Becker was convicted of torture and aggravated mayhem. She’s facing life in prison without the possibility of parole. Our serious condolences to Glen.
Glen isn’t the only guy whose penis has been attacked. Of course, there’s the original penis victim, John Wayne Bobbitt, whose wife Lorena cut off his member in the middle of the night. But there are other guys out there whose penises have also been in peril. After the jump, we chronicle their stories. Keep reading »
Last week, Samantha Malson was arrested for pushing and chocking her boyfriend Lars Hansen after a drunk Hansen refused to stop singing the song “Thrift Shop” by Macklemore. Sure, “Thrift Shop” is a great song, but hearing anything over and over again is going to be annoying.
Poor Lars is hardly the only person to suffer for a song. Read on, for more tales of music murder and mayhem. Keep reading »
The chicken wings were cute. The Muenster cheese? Adorable. Yesterday’s theft of seven palettes of Nutella? Well, okay. But come on people? Stealing an entire truckful of soup? Where is this going!? Eusebio Acosta of — where else? — Orlando, Florida, stole the truck, but didn’t get very far with it. He was arrested and charged with grand theft auto. I guess that much soup is kind of hard to hide. [WFLX]
First, a couple of dudes stole $65,000 worth of chicken wings. Then someone stole 42,000 pounds of Muenster cheese. And now, thieves have made off with $21,000 worth of Nutella. Over the weekend, the town of Niederaula, Germany, was robbed of seven palettes of Nutella. The Nutella addicts stole the jars from a parked semi-truck trailer.
And that leads me to believe that someone is getting ready to throw the world’s biggest weird-combinations-of-food party. What could you make with all that chicken, Nutella and cheese? Let’s go to the cookbooks, shall we? Keep reading »
An Indiana couple proved that a couple that tries to see a double feature without paying together, get felony charges together. Lendsey and Delilha Harbin were spotted by an off-duty cop, volunteering as security at a movie theater, as they tried to sneak into the latest zombie flick, “Warm Bodies” after seeing “Snitch.” The officer approached the couple and asked if they had tickets to the flick. After a pause, Delilha responded, “I know we done wrong.” The couple then claimed they’d been at a funeral and were now “not thinking correctly.” Read more…
Fa la la la la. Four guys, dressed at Smurfs, were arrested in connection with a convenience store assault in Melbourne. Allegedly, the blue guys roughed up a 37-year-old man because he refused to light one of the Smurf’s cigarettes. I know what you’re thinking, The Smurfs are peaceful creatures, even Jokey. They would never do that! Or maybe, Why were these men dressed as Smurfs? Inconclusive. Lots of criminals wear disguises, but those who choose to dress as children’s characters really make ya wonder. [Huffington Post]
Click through for more crimes committed by people dressed up a children’s characters. Believe it or not, there are more.
Dear Zachariah Dalton,
Most women will tell you that they want a man who’s close to his parents. A man who loves and respects his mother and father and has a good relationship with them. It seems, Zachariah, that you are one of those guys. The other day, when you attempted to rob a Thumbs Up convenience store in Niceville, Florida, you realized that you had no getaway vehicle. And the reason you had no getaway vehicle? It seems you have two prior arrests for driving under the influence.
Perhaps you intended to buy one with your new windfall — only the clerk at Thumbs Up didn’t actually have any money in his cash drawer, so you were left without. I suppose it’s okay, though, because according to the police, you hadn’t really planned to rob the store, you’d only come up with the idea while walking there.
So, no harm, no foul. Keep reading »
After a bad breakup, feelings of love can quickly turn to hatred. You say things you don’t mean and wish for things you don’t actually want. But what happens when a person becomes so livid that bitter hypotheticals become actual actions? Some strange tales prove that all is not fair — or sane, for that matter — in love and war.
Love Explosion: While flying to Dallas, Christopher Shell’s plane was turned around and boarded by a SWAT team–that were coming for him. Shell’s ex-girlfriend had phoned in a bomb threat, saying he possessed liquid explosives. Fortunately, Shell was quickly cleared, but the ex-girlfriend and her boyfriend were brought into custody soon after. Read more…
Talk about invasive marketing. A woman in Ohio allegedly broke into a home, tidied up a bit, then left a bill for $75 written on a napkin with her phone number, reports the Chronicle-Telegram of Elyria, Ohio. Police say Susan Warren took out the trash, vacuumed, dusted, and washed a few mugs, while the homeowner’s 19-year-old daughter slept upstairs. Read more…