Posts tagged "weird crimes"

Woman Who Aided In Prison Escape Is Sentenced To Up To 7 Years

Act like you’ve been there before. …

Lauren Vinopal / September 28, 2015

It Happened In Florida: Alleged University Library Foot-Sniffer Arrested!

Good news! Police have arrested the man they say has been sniffing women’s feet without their permission at Florida International University’s campus library. Eddy Juan, 52, allegedly was busted — on camera, too! — crawling around the library and under tables, taking big ol’ whiffs of lady toe jam and foot sweat. Juan is a registered sex offender, having been charged with…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / September 16, 2015

Texas Woman Hides Loaded Gun In Vagina (Plus, Some Other Ill-Advised Items Women Have Stashed In Their Kitties)

Vaginas are not meant to be storage units. They are not meant to be purses. They are not meant to be secret hiding places. You are not supposed to put unsterilized foreign objects in them. Most of us understand these rules. Ashley Cecilia Castaneda, 31, of Waco, Texas, apparently missed the memo. On Monday, she…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / September 10, 2015

Rogue Pooper On The Loose In Portland, Plus 10 Other Poop Bandits

Shit is going down in Portland, Oregon, y’all. A truly crappy state of affairs, residents are on the lookout for an as-yet-unidentified gentleman who has been seen evacuating his bowels in public spaces across their fair city. Yes, I said gentleman, as he travels with his own toilet paper and at least has the courtesy to wipe when he’s done,…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / August 28, 2015

Feds: Man Tipped Strippers 2200 Times With Company Cash

There’s using the company credit card for unethical reasons, and then there’s this alleged story out of Gilbert, Arizona. The feds accuse John David Berrett of dropping $476,000 of employer World Wide Technology’s cash on what the Arizona Republic describes as an “online-stripper habit.” A 16-page indictment details the IT architect’s alleged activity over the…

Newser / July 28, 2015

Robert Durst, Subject Of HBO’s “The Jinx,” Arrested In New Orleans

Robert Durst, the New York real estate heir who is the subject of HBO’s six-part docuseries “The Jinx,” was arrested today in New Orleans on a warrant in a homicide investigation in Los Angeles. While little is known about the investigation, many suspect its related to the execution-style murder of Durst’s friend Susan Berman i…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / March 15, 2015

It Happened In Florida: Macy’s Shoplifter Smears Poop On Employees’ Faces During Escape Attempt

There are still two and a half more days left in 2014, which is plenty of time to pull some sort of stunt and earn a spot on the Most Amazing Criminals of the Year list. And lookie here, Marisol Toribio of Fort Lauderdale, Florida, has come in just under the wire by shoplifting at…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / December 29, 2014

Today In Terribleness: Man Accused Of Killing Ex-Girlfriend’s Dog And Feeding It To Her

As a human being, this news story repulses me. As a dog owner who thinks of Lucca as my child, it sends a murderous rage pump through my veins. Police say Ryan Eddy Watenpaugh, 34, of Palo Cedro, California, killed his ex-girlfriend’s dog and fed it to her, the last disgusting act in a string…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / September 15, 2014

Woman Arrested For Breaking Into Dude’s Home To “Cuddle With Him”

I know what you’re thinking, but you’re wrong. It was NOT me. I may be a cuddle monster, but I’m only interested in getting them consensually. The same can’t be said for Dawn Cole, 49, of Sparta, Wisconsin, who broke into an unidentified man’s home because she was that desperate to spoon.

Amelia McDonell-Parry / September 10, 2014

Woman Arrested For Shoplifting $144 Worth Of, Well, I Think You Can Guess

Meet Brandy Allen, Fayetteville, Arkansas resident and eye makeup enthusiast. Allen was arrested on Monday after she was spotted swiping eyeshadow from an ULTA beauty store. While her friend attempted to distract store employees with Tammy Faye Baker eye makeup tutorials lively conversation, Allen shoved as much eyeshadow into her purse without even checking the…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / September 3, 2014

10 Totally Foul Fart Crimes

Passing gas is a natural, normal and completely uncontrollable bodily function. So how is it that so many people are arrested in fart-related incidents? Think I’m talking out of my ass? Hardly! Better open a window — here are 10 times the police were called in because someone had the nerve to break wind……

Amelia McDonell-Parry / August 22, 2014

Woman Punches Man After He Farts In Her Face

Well, this stinks. Jessica Annette Cerney was minding her own business, laying on the couch at home in Myrtle Beach, when Darrell Ray McKnight — presumably a friend or acquaintance of Cerney’s who, according to the police report, “routinely” sleeps on the front porch — wandered inside and “passed gas” in Cerney’s face. Cerney bolted…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / August 21, 2014

South Carolina Woman Tries To Steal Vibrator By Hiding It In Her Baby’s Stroller

I’ll be honest, I happen to think that if you’re going to steal a vibrator from a Spencer’s in South Carolina, hiding the sex toy behind a baby sitting in a stroller is a pretty good plan. I mean, there’s a solid chance that when the alarm goes off as you try and exit the…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / July 21, 2014

Another Day, Another Couple Having Public Sex At A Fast Food Restaurant

Remember that couple caught doing the nasty behind a dumpster outside a Delaware Dunkin’ Donuts? Well, there must be something in the air in that neighborhood, because yet another couple has been spotted boning on the rooftop of a Chipotle two blocks away. And people say Paris is the most romantic city in the world!

Claire Hannum / July 14, 2014

Half-Naked Woman Busted For Drugs, Doing Yoga In The Middle Of The Street

From what I understand, one of the things that many yoga practitioners like about the practice is that it can be done by anyone at anytime. But I think we can all agree that one yogi took that a little too literally when she decided to strip down to her skivvies and started doing yoga…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / July 11, 2014

Foil-Wrapped Crack Cocaine, A Loaded Gun & 8 Other Weird Things Women Have Hidden In Their Vaginas

Vaginas are not meant to be storage units. They are not meant to be purses. They are not meant to be secret hiding places. You are not supposed to put unsterilized foreign objects in them. Most of us understand these rules. But apparently Jennifer Renee Crosby of Wabasso, Florida (OBVIOUSLY), did not get the memo. Crosby…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / July 9, 2014

Today In PAFU: Man Accused Of Killing Cousin During “Sex Game Gone Wrong” Cleared

PAFU, in case you forgot, is a term coined by our dear Ami Angelowicz, which stands for “People Are Fucked Up.”

Mark Pickford, 41, from Manchester, England, has been cleared in the death of his cousin, Dawn Warburton, in what authorities believe was a “sex game gone wrong.” Yes, a sex game betwee…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / July 7, 2014

4-Year-Old Foils Babysitter’s Plan To Blame Staged Home Invasion/Robbery On Black Men

Kids say the darndest things — including the truth when you least expect it. Four year-old Abby Dean from Washington, Wisconsin, was chillin’ at home with her 17-year-old babysitter, when two men broke in the house and stole the family’s iPod, Xbox and Wii consoles. When the police arrived, the babysitter told officers that two…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / June 24, 2014

Real-Life Goldilocks Arrested After Falling Asleep During A Break-In

Having your house broken into is hardly what anyone would consider a “fairytale,” but when the burglar in question falls asleep on your couch after taking a shower, changing into your clothes and eating your food, it sounds an awful lot like one fairytale in particular. Meet Chancy Layton, 19, Florida’s (where else?) own real-life…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / June 24, 2014
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