Hark! Please stop what you’re doing and pay attention to this important celebrity diet news! An anonymous source told Now magazine that Kelly Osbourne is staying thin by eating food that is a different color than her plate. The technique theorizes that eating meals off a plate with a similar color may cause a person to eat up to 20 percent more. “Five months after Kelly started the plan the results are there for all to see. She thinks it’s amazing — she takes her plates everywhere. Unlike other fads, Kelly says this diet does help you lose weight and keep it off,” said the source.
OK. That’s all. You can go back to whatever you’re doing. I just got a kick out of the idea of Kelly Osbourne carrying around a variety of brightly-colored plates at all times. We can go back to talking about her $250,000 manicure, now. [Digital Spy]
Update, 3:40 p.m.: Ooof. We now hear via Just Jared that these quotes are supposedly fake. Christina’s rep has said she never made these comments to Billboard. We’ll keep you posted on this weird story. [Just Jared]
“During the promotion of my album ‘Stripped (in 2002), I got tired of being a skinny, white girl. I am Ecuadorian but people felt so safe passing me off as a skinny, blue-eyed white girl. The next time my label saw me, I was heavier, darker and full of piercings! Let me tell you, that wasn’t an easy pill for them to swallow. They called this serious emergency meeting about how there was a lot of backlash about my weight. Basically, they told me I would effect a lot of people if I gained weight – the production, musical directors. … I told (my label) during this ‘Lotus’ recording, ‘You are working with a fat girl. Know it now and get over it. They need a reminder sometimes that I don’t belong to them. It’s my body. My body can’t put anyone in jeopardy of not making money anymore — my body is just not on the table that way anymore.
– Christina Aguilera spoke to Billboard about her new album Lotus and hit on something that women in the music biz can be somewhat skittish (understandably) to discuss publicly: the way your body is part of your product as much as your voice. It’s always struck me as an unfair double standard. I mean, Cee Lo clearly is not getting called in and being told to drop some weight. And it’s especially dispiriting that a singer with a phenomenal voice like Christina Aguilera has to deal with that shite. Good for her for putting her foot down! Between this and Lady Gaga’s admission last week that’s she’s battled anorexia and bulimia, it’s really the week of pop stars speaking out — and we’ll all be better for it. [New York Daily News] [Photo: Splash News]
I was recently contacted through my website by a pregnant black woman who inquired about hiring me to perform standup at her baby shower. She and her husband were diehard comedy fans, and thought it would be fun to have a comic perform for their guests.
“How did you find me?” I asked. “I Googled ‘Fat Black Female Comics’ and you were one of the women that popped up!” she answered. “Everyone knows that fat black women are the funniest comics alive!”
After I hung up the phone, I sat there for a moment trying to figure out if I should be offended or not. While I understand that she was trying to be complimentary, I’m not sure if I am flattered by someone thinking that I am automatically funny just because I am plus-sized and black. Then I thought about the $1,500 she offered to pay me to stand in the middle of her living room and crack jokes for 30 minutes, and I instantly felt better. Throughout my career, I’ve been paid much less to do far worse. There was plenty of time for me to be offended later, but for now it was time to get paid!
Comedy is hard work, no matter what you look like. The perception that fat black women have an edge up, purely because of the size of their bodies, diminishes the amount of hard work, discipline and creativity that it takes for us to create this art form known as comedy. Furthermore, I think it’s crazy that someone would assume that all fat black women are funny.
On the other hand, I get it. Keep reading »
This piece is part of The Frisky’s How To Deal Week, in which we’re tackling mental health issues.
A week before my high school graduation, my doctor told me that I had to go to the hospital.
My weight had fallen too low, my EKG results were scary, and my continued refusal to eat was putting my life in danger. While my classmates went to college orientation, I went to nutrition counseling and group therapy. For two years I had faithfully obeyed the voice in my head that told me that if I ate more than the acceptable amount of food (an amount that kept getting smaller and smaller), I would be weak, my body and the world would spin out of control, and something terrible would happen. And yet something terrible was happening anyway.
I was losing every bit of control over my life, and goals I had spent years working towards — a scholarship to an elite college, freedom from my family and small town — were slipping from my grasp. I realized there was something I feared even more than the voice in my head, and I started to fight back. I obeyed the nutritionist even when my mind told me it couldn’t possibly be okay to eat this much food. I started to gain weight. And in the fall I enrolled in college. Keep reading »
When celebs share their diet and exercise tips, we listen. Even if the tips involve things like eating only baby food or jumping around in Kangoo boots. Hey, whatever works! Kim Kardashian has dropped some weight since becoming Kimye. How? Allegedly, the reality star shed seven pounds in seven days on the “sex diet.” An anonymous friend of Kim’s told the National Enquirer that the sex diet is code for “having regular sex, that tends to burn calories and kill the appetite. Losing seven pounds in seven days means being a very naughty girl.” Now, this is a diet we’d try without hesitation. It doesn’t even involve juice cleanses or hours on the stairmaster. Just good old fashioned sex! Click through to see more celebs who swear by the sex diet. [Music Rooms]
There is no shortage of bizarre products and tools claiming mystical weight loss properties that will have you dropping pounds as if the basic rites of diet and exercise never existed. My personal favorite pitch thus far is that of SlimScents, which urges you to, and I quote, “harness the POWER of an EXCITING new research breakthrough” to “sniff yourself thin.” Convincing, no?
Alas, my beloved SlimScents have been upstaged by the latest and greatest in fraudulent weight loss technology: Prends-moi, now available on the British market, is “the world’s first slimming fragrance,” designed to “slim with pleasure” using ingredients that release endorphins already present in the body to trigger a “pleasure message” within the brain. (Also noteworthy: egregious overuse/abuse of the word “pleasure.”) Keep reading »