As far as I’m concerned, Global Saskatoon morning news anchor Lisa Dutton brings us double entendre comedy at its finest. Her “tip” about how to soothe a teething child’s itchy gums with the rubber end of a vibrating toothbrush turned into an entirely different kind of tip. It was far more than “good banter.” I think her co-host Kevin Stanfield’s face says it all. How did neither of them bust up laughing? [Deadspin]
Tag Archives: viral video
Now, this is how you slap an ass. Percussionist Jorge Perez Gonzalez of the band Patex makes beautiful music with female bottoms. Maybe I should be offended, but I find myself rather mesmerized by his skill. And his butt lotioning technique. I prefer Buttcussion to Gangam Style or the Harlem Shake or whatever other dance craze is sweeping the internet this week. [Buzzfeed]
Dear Ivan Zamotaev,
I’ve always had a thing for men who play accordions, so when you walked onto the “Russia’s Got Talent” stage and debuted your talent–playing a fascinating instrument called an “alcordion”–I was immediately intrigued. And then I found out that the “alcordion” is just an alcoholic accordion, with a bottle of vodka and a glass attached to it so you can pour yourself shots and knock ‘em back without skipping a beat, and I was totally smitten.
Maybe next time you can play me a tune?
In the latest experiment for their show “Guinea Pigs,” Dutch TV hosts Dennis Storm and Valerio Zeno were hooked up to an electro-simulator that mimics the painful contractions women experience during labor. The video is in Dutch, but around the 7-minute mark, it becomes very clear that agony is a universal language. Apparently the guys underwent two hours of simulated contractions, which is significantly less time than the 6-12 hours (and beyond!) that many women spend in labor. Also? I’d imagine the whole process is a bit less harrowing without the whole “pushing a watermelon-sized human out of your crotch” part. Mothers, give yourselves a pat on the back. You deserve it. [YouTube via Truth Dig]
In 2005, I went to grad school in England, and around then, the biggest song on the UK charts was the Crazy Frog ringtone. Not even kidding — a fucking terrible ringtone was the number one track in the country. So it’s no surprise that a song by a British man who refers to himself as £1 Fish Man released a highly successful track called (drumroll) “One Pound Fish.” It is, as you might imagine, rather terrible. But the video does offer a vast array of trouts and salmons for ogling. It has more than eight million views on it so far. And in case the music industry was wondering why it’s been in a horrible death spiral for the last few years — this guy is signed to Warner Music Group. [YouTube]
As a person who falls down regularly in public, I feel like this video of embarrassing slip-ups in railway stations PSA just can’t be real. I’m sorry, but gravity would not allow a woman to fall upwards on an escalator “reverse plank” style. I know from experience. The others might be real, but are caused by running and drunkenness. But I think we can all agree that even if this video is not real, it’s absolutely ridiculous and you should watch it. [DListed]
This video clip from a Portland news station begins like any other slightly awkward local news interview, but then, about 12 seconds in, it becomes the the most hilariously awkward local news interview ever, involving tits and the vacuum cleaner man. Just push play, OK? And then you’ll understand why I’m starting a campaign to get this woman her own show. And also bringing her a fruit basket and asking her if she will be the weird aunt I’ve never had. [YouTube via Molls]
There are a lot of theories going around the Interwebs right now about who Ashli Gay really is, and if that’s her mother sitting behind her, revealing her bra. This video was apparently made in response to a woman named Ellie King, who accused Ashli of being fake, which is why, we suppose, she spends half the video attempting to validate her own existence. But aside from the obvious comedy of the mother/daughter hype team here, all you really need to know is in another video, Ashli says, “My dad is not a fuckin’ horse. And gee, I didn’t know horses could drive a truck and go to work. And I’m not a llama. Last time I checked, llamas don’t have periods.” Just so we’re clear.
Sometimes you don’t get the viral videos you want, you get the viral videos you deserve.
Dear Guy Who Spent 3.5 Hours Pronouncing The World’s Longest Word,
In second grade I gained a certain amount of notoriety on the playground for memorizing the spelling of “antidisestablishmentarianism,” which was, according to my teacher, the longest word in the world. Obviously Mrs. Shumaker was sorely mistaken, because the actual longest word in the world is the chemical name of a protein that contains 189,819 letters and takes nearly three and a half hours to pronounce in its entirety.
But you, sir, weren’t fazed by this lengthy locution. In fact, you filmed a video of yourself pronouncing the whole thing. And even as the potted plant next to you wilts tragically and your 5 o’clock shadow grows into a dark beard, you maintain your sexy Russian monotone.
After you catch your breath, would you like to read me a bedtime story?
If you loved Rebecca Black’s “Friday” but felt like it was missing a mashed potato-themed rap and a turkey leg microphone, well, here you go. Also, once you’re done watching it, could you tell us why a grown man in a sparkly turkey costume is eating Thanksgiving dinner with a group of confused 9-year-olds? [YouTube via Buzzfeed]