I don’t usually have luck with vending machines because I’m a rather picky person, but if I were in Germany, I know there are 500 machines that would have me happy to make a purchase. TG-Gold-Super-Markt, a German company, has plans to install vending machines that sell gold as if it were chocolate bars. The machines will be in airports and train stations. The company hopes to capitalize on the increased interest in gold investments since people are wary of investing in other commodities. The machine prices will be 30 cents higher than the market value and will be updated every few minutes. TG-Gold-Super-Mark owner Thomas Geissler said, “German investors have always preferred to hold a lot of personal wealth in gold, for historical reasons. They have twice lost everything. Gold is a good thing to have in your pocket in uncertain times.” [Impact Lab]

This morning I was driven into orgasmic ecstacy when I found out about this sex toy vending machine. A brilliant company, called Tabooboo, has been marketing these for a few years but people are finally starting to take notice. Available mostly in the U.K., these bright pink vending machines sell 11 different products—including nipple clamps, heaven beads, finger bunnies, key chain rockets, and love eggs. Most of the products are pretty small and discreet although there’s nothing secretive about buying a sex toy from a vending machine. Best of all, they are cheap, about $9 each.

At our offices they just took away our first aid kit, and I think they owe us something. Although this machine costs $1800, if we can’t have band-aids and aspirin, at least we should have vibrators. Because an orgasm is the best painkiller there is. [Tabooboo]

The people behind New Zealand website Flossie.com thought, “Why isn’t finding a man as easy as buying a can of Coke?” So, they decided to make it that simple by creating a vending machine that dispensed men in the buyer’s preferred type: classic, action, romantic, rich, foreign, and Mr. Perfect. (Mr. Perfect is a vibrator.) They installed the vending machine on a sidewalk, and as people passed by, they got a big, surprise when they pushed a button and a man bearing flowers walked out. In a little over 30 minutes, all of the men had been dispensed, and 200 vibrators had homes. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if you could push a button that read “Adventurous Music- And Book-Loving Slightly Bearded Cute Boy” and out one came? [Flossie.com via Notcot.org]