Hey, do you know what your vagina is thinking right now? Maybe it’s: “I’d really enjoy a steam bath.” If your vagina isn’t saying, but you are intrigued, you may want to jump on the latest vagina trend since the vagina facial and vajazzling: chai-yok. The practice is Korean in origin, although it’s hot now in Los Angeles. Basically, you squat over a steaming pot of mugwort, wormwood, and various herbs. The result? Lessened stress, possible increased fertility, and regulated menstrual cycles. Various forms of taking your vagina to the spa can cost you from $20 to $75. Isn’t your vagina worth it? [L.A. Times] Keep reading »
I first heard the word “labiaplasty” three years ago. Immediately, my interest was piqued. My unruly butterfly wings — otherwise known as my labia — interfered with my sexual activities. Riding a bike for more than 15 minutes? Painful. Camel toe? Obvious. Intercourse? Lube did little to relieve all that smooshing, pulling, stretching, especially when condoms were involved.
And then there were the unsolicited anatomical editorials that I’d received over the years, ranging from the respectfully observant, “You’re very floral,” to the horrifying, “Damn, girl. You got a fat p***y!,” to the complimentary, “Actually, I like it full and lippy … That’s my thing.” Keep reading »
If you thought #3 on yesterday’s list of “Signs You Ain’t Nothin’ But A Hoochie Mama” made you cringe, wait till you hear the name of this new line of blankets: Vagisoft. Shudder. And I’m not shuddering because it’s cold and I need a blanket. I mean Vagisoft sounds like the kinda thing you hide in your medicine cabinet, not sell as being softer than a “freshly laundered bunny.” And, honestly, who would launder a bunny?! The same peeps who make a blanket like a vagina, apparently. Creeps. [WOW Report] Keep reading »
OK, I didn’t get a vagina facial — or “vagacial” — or “Peach Smoothie,” as it’s called — but Alex Kuczynski’s personal story for Harper’s Bazaar of getting one was so freakin’ intimate that I feel like I got one by proxy. What the hell is a vagacial, you ask? It’s a facial. Except it’s on your vagina. Like, if someone was going to see your vagina, and you wanted it to look fresh and new, you could get a Peach Smoothie. Yes, there is one more beauty regime you must now worry about not having done yet. Don’t worry. Your vagina can wait. Keep reading »
Now, I am aware that “Keeping Up With The Kardashians
” is not exactly high-brow television. I mean, you’re never going to see two of the family members debate the symbolism in James Joyce’s Ulysses
. But still, I’m sometimes shocked by how low the series sinks sometimes. We’ve seen Kourtney
an at-home bikini wax
. But on the latest episode, Kim
accompanies Khloe to a pro for laser hair removal. Sample dialogue: “You have a better, like, looking vagina than I thought.” [Huffington Post
] Keep reading »
Thought vajazzling had finally drifted into obscurity and you’d never hear another word about the gemstone vagina art? (Sorry.) Now vajazzling fans can do an easy DIY version with this Butterfly Merkin, which allows you to apply Swarovski crystals to your nether regions with an adhesive peel. Sold at Coco de Mer, here’s an excerpt from the product description: “Your p**sy will purr when you put on this beautiful diamante butterfly.” Cringe. [Coco de Mer] Keep reading »
I hear cosmetic surgery advertisements all the time on the radio: breast enhancements, tummy tucks, liposuction, and vaginal rejuvenation.
Okay, the first three are obvious. But that fourth one? Vaginal rejuvenation? Does my vagina need to be made young again? I didn’t know it was old.
Actually, vaginal rejuvenation surgery is supposed to counteract the stretching effect that giving birth has on your vagina. The more children you give birth to, the more stretched out it gets. And it never returns to its original size. Read more … Keep reading »
The other day, I was sitting around, and I was thinking, you know what this world needs? World peace, an end to the BP disaster, and underwear that camouflages camel toe. While we may not have reached world peace or solved the BP mess yet, someone has invented Camelflage, undies that conceal unsightly camel toe action. What are the benefits of Camelflage, you ask? “Visual privacy,” because who wants their hoo-ha on display all over town? “Confidence,” because I know I feel better when I know everyone can’t see my genital silhouette, and “Secure fit,” because when I wear Camelflage, I want to stay camelflaged. Then, as the website points out, “You will feel safe and secure knowing you aren’t ‘that girl’ everyone is laughing at behind your back.” And who wants to be that girl? I know I don’t. All this for $19.99. Now, onto world peace. [Racked] Keep reading »
If The Frisky had a mascot, we’d like to think it would be Tatiata Kozhevnikova, a 42-year-old Russian with the world’s strongest vagina. That’s not a turn of phrase either. Guinness World Records actually crowned her queen of the vaginas. In any case, Kozhevnikova has returned with a new video, showing off her vaginal superpowers. Surely, this is one of the most amazing vaginas ever. Personally, I don’t totally get what’s going on here? Like, how is this thing attached to her hooha? Or is she clenching it, like, inside? One day, we may see workout rooms at the gym filled with women who have barbells dangling from their vaginas, taking vagina power-building classes. It could happen, people. [Total Pro Sports] Keep reading »