“I felt like my vagina died. Turned off. Lights out … And you can lie to your relatives at Christmas dinner and tell them everything on the home front is just peachy. But you cannot lie to your vagina … [Jason and I] “have sex like Kenyan marathon runners … Sometimes your vagina dies … Then you know it’s time to go. There’s no reason to sacrifice your womanhood and femininity for some sort of weird feeling of responsibility to something that may not be right. I feel like far too many women do that … [Men] are not allowed to be the only ones thinking with their genitals. We think with our pussies.”
– Excerpts from Olivia Wilde‘s vagina monologue. The other night at These Girls, an event hosted by Glamour, Olivia Wilde presented a live, solo performance about the death of her vagina, the end of her marriage and the resurrection of her sex life with new boyfriend, Jason Sudeikis (who must be feeling like the stud of the damn century today). But all joking about lifeless vaginas and marathon sex aside, she makes a very valid point: you cannot lie to your vagina. It has an intelligence all its own. And you can’t convince it or try to change its mind. Women, (well, no one, but especially women) shouldn’t sacrifice their pleasure to keep a passionless relationship afloat. [NYMag.com]
I don’t know about you, but I hardly ever have a spare tampon around. Actually, I always seem to be running out of them. If by some miracle you have tons of tampons laying around and you’re looking for an egregious way to waste them, here are some ideas courtesy of a website dedicated entirely to Tampon Crafts. Yes, tampon crafting is a thing that really exists.
This Halloween, you may want to consider making your decorations out of tampons. Try to control your blood-curdling scream when you behold this terrifying tampon ghost. BOO!
Click through for more tampon craft projects perfect for any time of the month … or year.
Full Frontal Freedom is a coalition of artists and media professionals who are using their talent and creativity to raise awareness about the important issues this election year and remind you that it’s sexy to vote. “Our vote is our most powerful weapon in this democracy … All the money in the world cannot buy votes. We recognize that with creativity, innovation, passion and the power which comes from being on the right side of history, we can change hearts and minds in our favor,” says the website.
So, how do they do they plan to do this? By making funny, compelling and fun-to-watch videos, which educate while entertaining. Like “A Vagina, Interrupted,” which reminds us of how easily our rights may be violated if we don’t make our voices heard by voting. [Full Frontal Freedom]
A new Summer’s Eve campaign called “ID the V” tests your knowledge of your own vagina. According to the quiz nearly 70 percent of women are unable to identify the five major parts of their own genitals. Wow, that seems like a really high, really depressing percentage. Anyhow, the idea of promoting knowledge about the V, and the whole concept of “to know it is to love it,” is great. Summer’s Eve is also donating $1 to I Am That Girl, an organization dedicated to inspiring confidence in women and girls, for the first 25,000 women who get a perfect score on the quiz. Also, great.
The fact that the quiz is moderated by a talking hand that refers to itself as a vagina, BIZARRE. The only thing that would have been stranger is if they had drawn pubic hair on the hand. “Honestly, between you and me,” coos the talking hand/vagina, “I almost got one wrong on my first try and I’m a vagina!” Is it a trick question? Like, wait! That’s not a vagina! That’s a talking hand! Ten bonus points. If 70 percent of women don’t know their anus from their clitoris, isn’t anatomy this bait and switch going to confuse them further? For the record, I got 100 percent on the quiz and the talking hand/vagina congratulated me with a “Thatta girl!” which made me feel extremely uncomfortable. [Summer's Eve]
Ahoy matey! It’s that time of the month. Why not celebrate it by putting this hunky pirate cloth pad in your undies and letting him guard your hidden treasure? Or not. Believe it or not, there’s more swashbuckling menstruation products sailing the crimson seas of Etsy. Click on through to see more WTF period products that make us want to walk the plank. [$9 Etsy via Buzzfeed]
Breaking news for the female anatomy! In New Zealand, it was deemed safe to use the words “vagina” and “discharge” in TV commercials. An advertisement for Carefree Acti-Fresh Panty Liners, which aired in July, was the first to drop the V-bomb on the country. Naturally, the Advertising Standards Authority received many complaints from “disgusted” viewers.
K Spice said, “I have a nine year old who is up until 8 p.m. to 8:30 p.m. and he definitely does not need to hear words like that.” God forbid he should know the anatomically correct name for a body part! Another outraged viewer complained that pairing of a naked woman (no genitals showing) and the word vagina was “overly sexual.” Gasp! Keep reading »
Coco is the master of showing off cleave of all kinds — boob, butt and now vadge. In a photo shoot for Craze magazine she wore a silver body suit, which accentuated her cameltoe, or as Ice likes to refer to it, her “nice healthy, well defined coochie.” After the jump, Coco’s nice, healthy, well defined coochie. OK. I’ve officially fulfilled my creep quota for the day. [Coco on WhoSay] Keep reading »
Eek! Bicycle riding ladies, the Journal of Sexual Medicine has published a study about the bad things a bicycle can do to a vagina. According to researchers at Yale, competitive female cyclists who had their handle bars lower than their bike seat experienced “significantly higher vibratory thresholds in the anterior vagina, compared with riders whose handlebars were level with the bike saddle.” Translation: they lost sensation in parts of their vaginas! Keep reading »
I spent most of last week being confused/disturbed by Panty O’s new kegel panties, which allow you to exercise your vaginal muscles while you wear the underwear. I found this frightening, but then I received a press release for the Magic Banana. Never heard of it? I hadn’t either. It’s a flexible accessory for “strengthening your inner magical muscles.” I’m not going to get anymore detailed, but I think you should watch the instructional video. Just do it. It uses the phrase “in the smiling position.” So it’s marketed as a kegel exerciser that is supposed to help you achieve multiple orgasms.
The Magic Banana led me down a kegel wormhole. Pun intended. Let me warn you, most kegel exercise products are pastel and look like Medieval torture devices. But if your vagina’s been slacking off, you might want to check out some of the products available to work the lazy girl out.