Josh and I were together for a year and a half. We had a relationship built upon the stuff the Under Twos so often are: You both like the same book, you both like Christopher Guest, you do the horizontal mambo and it’s not, like, awful, and the next thing you know you’ve met a family and celebrated an anniversary.
You know, of course, that at some point you’ve got to listen to the voice inside your head that runs her mouth about “long-term compatibility.” It’s just that, right now, in this moment, you’re having an awful lot of fun eating pizza in bed with someone else beside you. And, you know, compared to your friend Vicki’s boyfriend, Josh is an absolute GEM. Keep reading »
I am the only woman in NYC who has never gotten waxed. This is a fact. If someone collected statistics, the numbers would definitely confirm it.
You could say I’m a bit of a wild woman. My hair is unpredictable, my nail polish is usually mostly chipped off, I can’t do a pantsuit to save my life and I have all sorts of body hair.
I know, I should be ashamed. I once wondered if anyone would ever love me. You’d think not, but actually, I’ve been married for a year! It doesn’t count, though, because he’s the hairiest man in the world. He’s basically half wildebeest. So he doesn’t notice these things. That’s the only possible explanation. Keep reading »
Ladyparts are oh-so-problematic. They smell. They’re hairy. And when you wear super-tight clothing, they don’t automatically invert inside your body like an oyster to prevent camel toe. Can’t a girl give herself a yeast infection in peace? Luckily, the marketplace has generously stepped in to “help” us “solve” this beguiling conundrum. We just heard about the Smooth Groove, an invention out of Britain that looks like a snazzy, black-and-white athletic cup. Smooth Groove’s website claims, without attribution, “A staggering 55 percent of women, irrespective of age size or weight experience camel toe at some point.” Um, really? Who is conducting those surveys?! No one has ever asked me about my camel toe. [Smooth Groove]
Let’s check out some more camel toe prevention products for those who like their dignity intact, as well as their leggings extra-snug.
Vaginas! So strange. So mysterious. So essential a component of the female anatomy. Sure, you may have a vagina. Or maybe you’re just curious about vaginas. Vaginas are like snowflakes. No two vaginas are alike. Of course, some vaginas are more exceptional than others. Like Hazel Jones, the woman who was so brave as to go on morning television to talk about her, not one, but two vaginas. Click through to find out more about Hazel’s lady flowers and other unique vaginas in our vagina-tastic slide show.
The last time I spread my legs for a doctor (and no, I haven’t slept with anyone in scrubs), Lindsay Lohan was a law-abiding citizen. Somehow, I had managed to put off my visit to the friendly gyno longer than I cared to admit. A close friend’s recent alarming diagnosis post-gyno visit had fueled me into action. Oh, and my medical insurance suddenly had an expiration date. I’d just been laid off from a job I’d held down for the last six years, the lease on my New York City apartment was about to end, along with the dollars in my bank account. I was, in what you might call, a very large pickle. Keep reading »