Tag Archives: us weekly

Us Weekly Helps You Drop Weight Like A Star!

Hey look! It’s my least favorite issue of Us Weekly — “2009 Diets That Work!”! That is, CELEB diets that work — all of the diets, workout plans, and “weight loss tricks” are ones that have worked for big money stars like Jennifer Aniston (such a fatty before, RIGHT?), Britney Spears, and Beyonce. And by the way, only women are featured in the “28 page bonus” section (ZOMG, I am tots getting my $3.99 worth). Sure, the vast majority of Us‘s readers are female, and presenting the perfectly perfect bodies of celebs is supposed to be aspirational, but c’mon. Gimme a few male chubsters who lost some weight and how they did it — like Horatio Sanz and Seth Rogan. I want to know how those guys — who were truly overweight — lost the lard. Keep reading »

Star Couplings: Pete & Ashlee Wentz Confirm The Worst Kept Secret In Hollywood

  • Pete and Ashlee Wentz (you asked for it chickie!) have confirmed that they’re expecting their first child together. They decided to wait to confirm the news until Ashlee made it through her first trimester, which means this baby (time to register for baby’s first flatiron!) should pop out around November. [FriendsOrEnemies.com]
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    Gossip Girl Ads Really Do Imply The F-Word

    Last night when we were walking home, we came across a wall of posters advertising the return of Gossip Girl. Guess that Keep reading »

    Star Couplings: John Mayer Assumes His Future Wife Reads Us Weekly

  • John Mayer, you are such a tool. The singer told Best Life magazine, “When I think about my [future] wife, I worry. I worry about what she thinks when she reads about me in Us Weekly. It’s all vapor, nothing, ether. But I worry about it. I worry about what she thinks.” Okay, dude. Maybe you should worry a little more about that embarrassing face you make when you play the guitar. [Us Weekly]
  • Of course Lisa Marie Presley is having twins. Does anyone just have one baby anymore? [DListed]
  • Okay, so we always knew there were gay rumors about Jake Gyllenhaal, but did you know that gossip mongers are now buzzing that Reese Witherspoon is really a lesbian? [2Snaps.tv]
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