You know all those times when you’re like, “Gee, I wish I had some pasty white people leg tights?” No? You don’t want those? Well, too bad, because Maison Martin Margiela has fashioned the perfect pair of skin-crawlingly Caucasian-flavored tights. These bad boys also include a rather menacing black stripe right across the thighs. Do you feel uncomfortable yet? How about when I tell you they originally retailed for more than $700? How about now? [LN-CC]
Look, as the wedding industrial complex has no doubt told us all since we were in the womb, weddings are lady people’s One Very Special Day. So by all means, if you want to blow your wad on a pair of kicks from Ugg’s Bridal Collection, go crazy. But don’t think for one second I am not going to judge the ever living hell out of you. Uggs wants you to walk down the aisle in these crappers — you and your bridesmaids. But if you do, I’m going to assume that you really wanted to be on the show “Bridezilla,” and that you’re probably some kind of half woman-half monster chimera. Just saying. [BrideFinds]
You know, I want to see the 50 states, but I don’t need to see through them. These Jeremy Scott sunglasses don’t seem to differentiate between the two. [$208, Amazon]
This “Structured Playsuit” is confusing for a number of reasons. It’s made out of neoprene fabric, which is what wet suits are made of, but the model is definitely wearing it with high heels, on dry land. It’s being sold at a trendy fashion retailer, but it looks like it would be much more appropriate hanging on the rack of a surf shop. It is theoretically a waterproof garment, but there are giant mesh panels across the shoulders. Where would you wear something like this? Maybe an “Under The Sea” themed cocktail party? Honestly I don’t think I get invited to enough of those to justify the expense. [$81, ASOS]
When your boyfriend first brought home his Coyote Mountain Man Hat, you were mortified. He was, after all, wearing a full, skinned coyote on his head. It was…hideous. And yet, you couldn’t look away. You were held rapt by its slack ears lying dormant above your boyfriend’s sparkling blue eyes. You gazed in wonder at Coyote Hat’s bushy, long tail. Suddenly, you saw your boyfriend in a whole new light. He was a warrior–a warrior who had gone online and paid $299.95 to have a dead animal shipped to your house so that he could wear it atop his head. It was, after all, the perfect accompaniment to his Saturday afternoon Affliction tee and cargo shorts ensemble. And it was then, after reckoning with Coyote Hat and all that it meant to your boyfriend–and finally, to you–that you realized you had to dump him. He was a total loser.
GQ: Lady blogs like Jezebel exploded after the episode with the Liz-hires-a-feminist-comic thing. It sure seemed like you were commenting on the outrage when Olivia Munn — hot lady, not necessarily hot comic — was hired on “The Daily Show.”
Tina Fey: I was actually really pleased that Jezebel got that it was about the whole Olivia thing, because the treatment of Olivia was weird on that site. She just kept getting reamed! And it was this weird mix. They would go after her, and then the next thing would be like, “Defending the Rights of Sex Workers.” And I was just like, “Well, why can’t we just say Olivia’s a sex worker? Leave her alone!”
— Tina Fey in GQ talking about the “30 Rock” episode “Joan Of Snark,” which addressed the way ladyblogs like Jezebel (and, to be fair, The Frisky) have criticized “The Daily Show”‘s Olivia Munn. Some would say Olivia leads with the “hot piece of ass” angle, but not Tina Fey.
After the jump, Tina gamely answered GQ‘s question, “Is Liz Lemon ugly?” Keep reading »
You know what I never, ever want on my vagina? A cityscape. Ditto, a plane on my boobs. [$375, Net-a-Porter] Keep reading »
Talk about a niche dating site. TheUglyBugBall.co.uk launched on Monday as the first online dating site only for ugly people in the U.K. It claims to “deal in reality,” is free to join and filled with 1,500 unattractive people who want to, um, bump uglies. First of all, that’s the best name for a website ever. Second of all, founder Howard James’ quote is the funniest ever: “It’s a sad fact that up to half of the UK is made up of ugly people yet amazingly nobody has ever thought of providing a dating service for them.” The rules are strict: attractive singletons are not allowed!
But isn’t a dating site for “the aesthetically challenged” kind of … wrong? Keep reading »
The Rumpus’ Dear Sugar advice column is a must-read this week: “Beauty and the Beast.” A man writes in to say he’s ugly, too ugly to ever find love.
“I’m an average 26-year-old man, exceptional only in that I’m writing to an Internet advice columnist and that I’m incredibly ugly.”
Sugar responds with a long, fascinating story about a man who was part beast and part beauty. Read it and weep. Keep reading »
The fashion event we’ve all been waiting for is only 10 days away, people. That’s right, the Kardashian sisters’ swimwear line is available May 10th! Get excited! Make some noise! Oh, what’s that? You’re not a stripper? Nevermind then, you probably aren’t going to want to wear any of the overpriced styles the three Kardashians have come up with. Kim’s relatively simple bikinis were actually the most manageable, but her sisters couldn’t keep things under control. Keep reading »