I’m sure there are some people who have a preferred brand of toilet paper, or at least think they do, but how many of us have actually been given an opportunity to compare and contrast various TPs in one
shitting sitting? That’s why I think this Dutch supermarket is on to something — the grocery store’s restroom is stocked with a wall of different brands of TP, all labeled, so you can pop a squat, do your business (personally, I think doing #2 would be the best test), and wipe away until they’ve settled on a fave. I’m not sure why this Dutch supermarket is so invested in helping customers find the best TP for their peeing and pooping needs, but I sure wish American grocery stores gave a shit. [Consumerist]
Charmin toilet paper ads usually include cute bears experiencing mishaps with toilet paper and eventually figuring out that Charmin is the best! This ad is a little bit different in that it is a butt. Literally, it is just a butt. A butt really close up so that the fold between pages looks like the ass crack. I guess the idea here is that if you use Charmin, your butt will be so clean that somebody could get that close? Honestly, I prefer the antics of the bears. [Buzzfeed]
Where did all the toilet paper go?
Cheap Chic Weddings announced Mimoza Haska as the winner of their ninth annual Toilet Paper Wedding Dress Contest on Thursday.
Congratulations to the southern hairdresser and stylist extraordinaire. The way you spun those 16 rolls of Charmin into a strapless, asymmetrical matrimonial gown is unlike anything we’ve ever seen. No, really.
Haska and the other two finalists were judged in New York City’s RK Bridal by Project Runway alum Kate Pankoke. Keep reading »
As you might expect, Beyonce’s recent revealed tour rider requests are hilarious. Titanium straws? Practical! Hand-carved ice balls! Amazing. But my favorite Sasha Fierce necessity has to be red toilet paper. Why? Again, whyyyyy? And where might someone buy red TP? Oh, not to worry, I did a little research, and it turns out a company called Renova makes not only crimson red toilet paper, but TP in a variety of bright colors. So now, if you’d like, you can wipe your ass like Beyonce. And it will only cost you $5.99 a roll! I can only imagine how fierce my vag and butt will feel afterwards. [Renova Shop]
Sibling roommates, Howard Meltzer, 67, and Bernice Meltzer, 72, ended up in jail this week because of an epic battle over their last roll of Charmin toilet paper.
According to Howard, Bernice stole the only remaining toilet paper roll in their home and locked herself in the bedroom with it, leaving him without anything to wipe with. For five hours, Howard waited at her door, screaming for her to give him back the toilet paper so he could use the bathroom.
“The roll was full when I went there in the morning … She unloaded a whole roll and left just a little, and when I looked up to the reserve, it wasn’t there. I said I want the toilet paper back by 1 [a.m.] or I’m calling the police,” Howard told the NY Post. Keep reading »
This is no Halloween prank: Massachusetts teens have officially broken the world toilet-paper-folding record. Students from the St. Mark’s School in Southborough completed 13 folds and 8,192 layers, beating a previous high school student’s record of 12 folds in 2002. The class was guided by their mathematics teacher James Tanton, who has waited seven years for a class to finally break the record.
The question is, how did they do it? According to BostInno.com, the students taped 64 layers of toilet paper the into a a sixth fold. They then mimicked those layers and folded the stack. The end result was 8,192 layers thick, 1.5 meters wide and 76 centimeters high. Read more…
As we discussed a couple of weeks ago, toilet paper is amongst the top 10 argument triggers for couples. It sounds petty, but a roll of toilet paper facing the wrong direction is a personal call to arms for me. I did a little research and as it turns out, I am not just a neurotic psycho. There is a preferred way to put toilet paper on the roll … MY WAY! Sixty to 70 percent of American consumers surveyed prefer their roll “over.” People who like their roll “under” were found to have a scientific correlation with ownership of a recreational vehicle or a cat. Very random, but it makes perfect sense. I would never be caught dead owning one of the aforementioned. And I would certainly never be caught orienting my toilet paper “under.” How about you? Are you an “over” or an “under”? [Wikipedia] Keep reading »
Remember the woman who eats toilet paper from our new favorite show “My Strange Addiction”? Well, guess what? I have totally found her new best friend! Above, meet Amanda, who appeared on a recent episode of TLC’s “Extreme Couponing.” She has an entire room
in her house filled with rolls of toiler paper. But instead of shaming Amanda for what is essentially hoarding
the stuff we wipe our asses with, this show seems to be, well, celebrating her obsessive frugality. So cool, uh, indeed. [The Hairpin
] Keep reading »
All of you have no doubt dreamed of being the 2010 Charmin King or Queen of the Throne. An epic contest will be held in New York City today to determine the winner, who will walk away with a check for $50,000. To win, contestants will face off in a Toilet Tissue Trivia Contest, followed by a physical competition which will test their toilet paper stacking, tossing, and mummy-making capabilities. Even better—we just got word that the winner will be crowned by Jane Lynch, Miss Sue Sylvester of “Glee” herself. We hope she is getting paid a lot for this, though I have a feeling she might just be taking home a lifetime supply of toilet paper. [EW] Keep reading »
If you’re getting married and have a bit of skill when it comes to DIY style projects, then head to your closest drugstore and stock up on toilet paper. Because for the sixth year running, it’s time to get crafty with TP as part of the Toilet Paper Wedding Dress Contest! Forget running, nail-scratching, and hair-pulling with other bridezillas in order to win a lower priced dress–this is the answer to your wedding day white gown dreams. Simply create a dress only using toilet paper, tape, glue, and a needle and thread, and enter the contest for a chance to win $1,000 to spend on the dress of your dreams. Get to designing and submit your photos to TPdresscontest@gmail.com! And please, please be sure to share your genius designs with us. A few more examples, after the jump! [Refinery 29] Keep reading »