Ron-Ron Juice is the creation of “Jersey Shore” meatball Ronnie. Go-Go Juice is the invention of “Coupon Queen” June, mother of “Toddlers and Tiaras” breakout star “Honey Boo-Boo Child” Alana. Both get their users hyped up and ready for the club/pageant stage. Both cause uncontrollable freak outs and grabby hands. But while Go-Go juice relies solely on a heady combo of high fructose corn syrup and caffeine, Ron-Ron juice has an added advantage: maraschino cherries. What, you thought we were going to say vodka, didn’t you?
I’m sorry, I’m sorry for doing this to you. Because once you see something like this, you can’t unsee it. A grown ass woman wearing a child’s pageant costume is a terrible, terrible thing and I’m really, really sorry. But at the same time, I felt duty-bound to let you know that “Coupon Queen” June and daughter Alana will be appearing on “Anderson” in matching outfits. That is all. Click for one more pick after the jump. [Buzzfeed]
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“Toddlers & Tiaras” pageant mom Susanna Barrett is mad. She’s just sick and tired of the way the media sexualizes little girls, and she’s not going to take it anymore! In fact, she’s launched a $30 million lawsuit against the Huffington Post, TMZ, and The Daily Mail for “brazenly” trying to sexualize her daughter, Isabella Barrett.
Yeah, take that, wicked, over-sexed media people! This sexualizing of innocent 5-year-old girls has got to stop! Just because little Isabella was caught on video singing along to the song “I’m Sexy and I Know It,” with a microphone, with mommy sitting right next to her … wait, something is very wrong with this picture, and I don’t think it has anything to do with TMZ, HuffPo, or the Daily Mail. Read more…
I simply must commend the wise minds behind “Dr. Drew’s Lifechangers” for concluding that Alana, our latest muse from “Toddlers & Tiaras,” was worthy of appearing on a show with such a name. In the episode airing Feb. 2, Alana shares her love of pageants with Dr. Drew, who also gives her Go Go Juice a try. Honey boo-boo child, I cannot wait for this!
Shannon June, mother of our newest “Toddlers & Tiaras” muse Alana, is speaking out about feeding her daughter “go-go juice” in last week’s episode. Was I the only one who snickered at the term? Last I heard, “go-go juice” was slang for, well, female juices shall we say. We know that’s not what she was drinking. “The go-go juice is just Mountain Dew and just a hint of Red Bull,” Alana’s mother explained. Sounds healthy! All judgey-ness aside, there are lots of terms on “Toddlers & Tiaras” that mean very different things in the real world. Click through to find out what the hell those pageant folks are talking about. [Inside Edition]
“Toddlers & Tiaras” is the poster TV show for how not to parent. You know it’s true, honey boo boo child! So go figure that the little girl with the least insane pageant mom and the best head on her shoulders is the goddaughter of a drag queen. Meet Shangela, aka DJ Pierce, an actor, stand-up comedian and drag performer from L.A. who just so happens to be the godfather of a lucky 9-year-old girl named Hailey. I came into the office this morning blabbing about the fabulousness of Shangela and Ami goes, “Oh, Shangela? She was on RuPaul’s Drag Race!” WHAT. NO. Now I’m obsessed — and I’m sure if you can stomach last night’s episode of “Toddlers & Tiaras,” you will be, too.
After the jump, 10 essential things to know about our new reality TV BFF Shangela, drag queen-slash-pageant-coach: Keep reading »