After Round One of March Madness, it seems that our fair friend Rush Limbaugh trounced his conservo-pal Kirk Cameron. He beat Cameron in the crazy competition by nearly 6 to 1. Rush’s anti-woman, anti-slut diatribes now go up against our favorite honey boo-boo child, Alana, the Go-Go Juice chugging beauty pageant tyke from “Toddlers and Tiaras.” Rush would no doubt be disgusted by Alana’s antics, and Alana would likely be completely immune to Rush’s taunts (whatever you say about her, she does have insanely high self-esteem). But whose existence is more mind-boggling? More utterly confusing and bewildering? Vote!
Who's The Craziest: Rush Limbaugh Or Alana From "Toddlers And Tiaras"?
- Rush Limbaugh's slut-shaming is the ultimate in crazy talk! (74%, 467 Votes)
- Alana and her go-go juice steamroll the competition! (26%, 165 Votes)
Total Voters: 632
In one corner, there is Alana, the breakout star of this season of “Toddlers and Tiaras.” Alana’s signature phrase is “honey boo boo child,” but she’ll also let you know that “a dollar makes me holler.” Her mom, Coupon Queen June, keep Alana perpetually doped up on a probably-illegal-in-some-states mix of Mountain Dew and Red Bull she calls Go-Go Juice. And Alana will shake her belly for you if you ask. In the other corner, there is MaKenzie, who’s at the top of the child beauty pageant food chain and is obsessed with her pacifier (which she calls her Ni-Ni). Her mother feeds her Pixie Stix to keep her jazzed. Who is the crazier brat? You decide!
Who Is The Crazier Beauty Queen Brat?
- Alana reigns supreme! (60%, 370 Votes)
- MaKenzie, always and forever! (40%, 251 Votes)
Total Voters: 621
Surprise! You thought “Toddlers & Tiaras” darling Eden Wood had retired, but in fact, she was busy filming her new reality TV show for Logo. “Eden’s World” will follow Eden, her (stage) mother, her publicist and her manager on their quest to make the former beauty queen a super star. As the random dude in the preview says, “Not everyone is Judy Garland, you know?” Oh yes, I am well aware. Eden Wood is certainly no Judy Garland in training. MaKenzie was robbed. An entire series about that little tasmanian devil? I would have watched. Alana, her mother and their endless supply of “go-go juice”? You could have counted me in! Eden Wood. Blech. [NY Mag]
“['Toddlers & Tiaras is] very bizarre … Patsy and JonBenet didn’t approach it that way. We … they just did it for fun … I think about these things now and it makes me cringe. We were so naïve. I now believe with all my heart that it’s not a good idea to put your child on public display.”
– John Ramsey on his regrets. I’m not sure if I agree that participating in pageants had any correlative relationship to his daughter’s murder. But I can’t blame him for hating “Toddlers & Tiaras.” I mean, it certainly is bizarre. Talk of child beauty pageants aside, I feel awful for this man. His daughter was murdered. His business and reputation were destroyed. His wife died of ovarian cancer. He spent 12 years as a suspect in his own child’s murder before he was cleared of all wrongdoing. Some people get dealt a shitty ass hand. I hope the rest of his life is really uneventful. [Yahoo]
“Toddlers & Tiaras” breakout star Alana has made a lot of waves in recent weeks, with her Go-Go Juice pusher mom June, and her totally outrageous personality. So when the Fine Brothers showed a tape of Miss Alana and her mama to a group of jaded teenagers, you can imagine that they were absolutely horrified — in a way that only jaded teens can be. Watch and enjoy their shocked reactions. [YouTube]