Tag Archives: toddlers and tiaras

“Toddlers & Tiaras”‘s Alana Gets Remixed

Meet Alana...
Our latest "Toddlers & Tiaras" muse. Watch »
MaKenzie Vs. Alana
Who's the brattier child beauty queen? Read More »
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It’s the simple things in life that I’m grateful for. Like when the universe conspires to produce internet video amazingness. I’m talking about “Honey Boo Boo Child” THE REMIX. Duh. Alana of “Toddlers & Tiaras” was born to be sampled and made into a club track. I can’t believe it took the internet so long to think of it. My congratulations to YouTube user djdarylraymondnyc who created the Holy Grail of remixes. There is no turning back now. Drink your Go-Go Juice, get your ass to da club and holla for that dollah. [You Tube]

The Real March Madness, Round Two: Rush Limbaugh Vs. Alana

March Madness!
Battle of the crazies! Read More »
Rush Smears "Slut"
Rush Limbaugh called Sandra Fluke a "slut" and a "prostitute" on air. Read More »
Meet Alana...
Our latest "Toddlers & Tiaras" muse. Watch »

After Round One of March Madness, it seems that our fair friend Rush Limbaugh trounced his conservo-pal Kirk Cameron. He beat Cameron in the crazy competition by nearly 6 to 1. Rush’s anti-woman, anti-slut diatribes now go up against our favorite honey boo-boo child, Alana, the Go-Go Juice chugging beauty pageant tyke from “Toddlers and Tiaras.” Rush would no doubt be disgusted by Alana’s antics, and Alana would likely be completely immune to Rush’s taunts (whatever you say about her, she does have insanely high self-esteem). But whose existence is more mind-boggling? More utterly confusing and bewildering? Vote!

Who's The Craziest: Rush Limbaugh Or Alana From "Toddlers And Tiaras"?

  • Rush Limbaugh's slut-shaming is the ultimate in crazy talk! (74%, 467 Votes)
  • Alana and her go-go juice steamroll the competition! (26%, 165 Votes)

Total Voters: 632

The Real March Madness: “Toddlers & Tiaras”‘ MaKenzie Vs. Alana

March Madness!
Battle of the crazies! Read More »
Meet Alana...
Our latest "Toddlers & Tiaras" muse. Watch »
Mak Is Back!
"Toddlers & Tiaras" brought Makenzie back. Thank God! Watch »

In one corner, there is Alana, the breakout star of this season of “Toddlers and Tiaras.” Alana’s signature phrase is “honey boo boo child,” but she’ll also let you know that “a dollar makes me holler.” Her mom, Coupon Queen June, keep Alana perpetually doped up on a probably-illegal-in-some-states mix of Mountain Dew and Red Bull she calls Go-Go Juice. And Alana will shake her belly for you if you ask. In the other corner, there is MaKenzie, who’s at the top of the child beauty pageant food chain and is obsessed with her pacifier (which she calls her Ni-Ni). Her mother feeds her Pixie Stix to keep her jazzed. Who is the crazier brat? You decide!

Who Is The Crazier Beauty Queen Brat?

  • Alana reigns supreme! (60%, 370 Votes)
  • MaKenzie, always and forever! (40%, 251 Votes)

Total Voters: 621

JonBenet Ramsey’s Father Is Not A Fan Of “Toddlers & Tiaras”

Meet Alana...
Our latest "Toddlers & Tiaras" muse. Watch »
Pageant Moms Vs. Media
Who's to blame for sexualizing little girls? Read More »

“['Toddlers & Tiaras is] very bizarre … Patsy and JonBenet didn’t approach it that way.  We … they just did it for fun … I think about these things now and it makes me cringe.  We were so naïve.  I now believe with all my heart that it’s not a good idea to put your child on public display.”

John Ramsey on his regrets. I’m not sure if I agree that participating in pageants had any correlative relationship to his daughter’s murder. But I can’t blame him for hating “Toddlers & Tiaras.” I mean, it certainly is bizarre. Talk of child beauty pageants aside, I feel awful for this man. His daughter was murdered. His business and reputation were destroyed. His wife died of ovarian cancer. He spent 12 years as a suspect in his own child’s murder before he was cleared of all wrongdoing. Some people get dealt a shitty ass hand. I hope the rest of his life is really uneventful. [Yahoo]

Teens React To “Toddlers & Tiaras” Honey Boo-Boo Child Alana

Meet Alana...
Our latest "Toddlers & Tiaras" muse. Watch »
Go-Go vs. Ron-Ron Juice
A comparison Read More »
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“Toddlers & Tiaras” breakout star Alana has made a lot of waves in recent weeks, with her Go-Go Juice pusher mom June, and her totally outrageous personality. So when the Fine Brothers showed a tape of Miss Alana and her mama to a group of jaded teenagers, you can imagine that they were absolutely horrified — in a way that only jaded teens can be. Watch and enjoy their shocked reactions. [YouTube]

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