I forbid you to talk about how next week is the finale of “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo.” No, we are NOT going to discuss it. I am still working on my post-”Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” contingency plan and until then, I am choosing to remain in denial. Let’s talk about last night’s episode, the theme of which, I’ve decided, was FACE. Everyone was giving it. Mostly not on purpose. There was also plenty of farting and snot. Obviously. Some of my favorite moments after the jump. Keep reading »
Tag Archives: tlc
Ami: I am already anticipating going into a deep depression when this season of “Here Comes Honey Boo” ends. I can feel it coming. And I can’t even bare to think of it. But we still have episodes to discuss and they are still mind-blowing, heart warming and disgusting all at once. I am going to skip the heart warming stuff where Alana and Sugar Bear go on a father/daughter outing to the skating rink and Alana sells lemonade to raise money for her next pageant (collective Awwwwwww), and get into the gizzards of the episode. Prepare yourself for smell breaths and more after the jump. Keep reading »
So here’s a nice cliched situation for you on this Monday morning. Anna Shannon, the oldest sister of “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” breakout star, Alana Thompson, has a one month old named Kaitlyn and apparently paternity is an issue. Anna’s ex-boyfriend strongly believes that he’s the daddy but the hillbilly family is not only refusing to let him see the child, but they are also avoiding a DNA test as well.
Caleb Clark has opted to do what any father looking for answers would do, he reached out to The National Enquirer (rather than pay for a DNA test) to spill the beans and no doubt profit from the redneck dilemma. Caleb also says that Anna confessed to him in a letter that she screwed around with someone else and that guy could very well be the father! Read more…
I have come to trust in the power of “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo.” I know that each week, it will leave me renewed and invigorated about life, teach me things I never would have known, take me places I never would have travelled … like Shhh! It’s A Wig or the local department store. First of all, I would like to congratulate the person who came up with the name Shhh! It’s A Wig. After the jump, Shhh! It’s A Wig and much, much more. Keep reading »
I feel like an awful human being saying this, but TLC’s “Abby & Brittany” just isn’t living up to my expectations in terms of answering any of my technical questions. HOW DO THEY POOP? Don’t get me wrong, they are wonderful, inspiring human beings. I enjoyed learning how they drive, watching them ride a Segway, student teach and get ready for their college graduation. The only scientifically interesting things I learned last night was that their stomachs hurt on opposite sides when they eat too much pizza and that they can simultaneously be different temperatures. Weird. The most exciting bit of the show, besides the previews for “Breaking Amish” (which looks enthralling by the way … Rumspringa!), was their hang out session Josiah, their “best friend.” Best friend, eh? Um, I think they are both in lurrvvvvveeee with Josiah. It’s so obvious. But are the feelings reciprocal? Let’s assess the romantic tension after the jump. Keep reading »
Do you need another way to waste time today? I think you do. And should it involve “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo?” I think it should. I still haven’t figured out the formula for how the Boo Boos come up with their nicknames, but TLC has applied the top secret algorithm to their Honey Boo Boo Nickname Generator. Mine is Apple Annie. I put in Tanning Mom’s name (Patricia Krentcil) just for fun as well. Her Boo Boo nickname is Pageant Kumquat. YES IT IS. What’s yours? Please share.
As always, the precious moments on last night’s episode of “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” were bountiful. I was still a little distracted by the discovery that June is the same age as me. It’s going to take me a while to process that. Anyhow, the Boo Boos are showing no signs of slowing down. I sincerely hope you’ve been watching as it’s difficult for me not to talk about every single second of every episode. I want us to share ALL of them together, but, for the sake of brevity, I am forced to pick the most beautimous nuggets. Spoiler: Last night’s undisputed climax was the revealing of June’s FORKLIFT FOOT. Oh YES. After the jump, FORKLIFT FOOT and much, much more. Keep reading »
As we know from last week’s episode of “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” (and the ensuing photographs floating around the interwebs), Chickadee pushed baby Kaitlin out of her biscuit. According to People, five-week-old Kaitlyn, born on July 26, has “four fingers and two thumbs on the right hand.”
In response to the rumors that June was mocking the baby’s birth defect, 33-year-old June says, “Not true. We have embraced [the abnormality]. It makes Kaitlyn more special to us.”
WAIT. Excuse me. June and I are the SAME AGE?! Holy shit. My brain just spontaneously combusted. Keep reading »
TLC is like my spirit animal cable channel, so my hopes were lofty for “Abby & Brittany,” the new show about 22-year-old identical, conjoined twins Abby and Brittany Hensel. I saw TLC’s special about them way back when they were 16 and getting their driver’s license. Then, I saw some British special filmed when they were 19 and Brittany was believed to be engaged. I was hoping “Abby & Brittany” would be all about navigating one twin’s relationship. And maybe even HOW SEX WORKS FOR THEM. They have one vagina. So is it considered a threesome when Brittany has sex with her fiance? I need to know! Keep reading »
Any new or cutting edge sexual info I get usually comes from Dan Savage’s podcast or TLC’s “Strange Sex,” so I try to keep abreast of those. Of course, I share anything stimulating that I learn with you. Sunday night’s episode of “Strange Sex” schooled me on sex furniture and sleep orgasms. And there was a guy who couldn’t get erections. (But that was just sad. I can’t write about him. Too depressing.) I know, you’re already getting excited. Settle down. Lessons forth coming.
First, sex furniture! I thought I knew what sex furniture was. I thought it was a fetish wherein one person pretended to be furniture. Where did I get that idea? Does that exist as well? Anyhow, this wasn’t about that. Keep reading »