Tag Archives: thoughts from guys on our im

Thoughts From Guys On Our IM: Would You Ever Violate Her Privacy?

The other night, when I was having dinner with a guy friend who told me my engagement history might scare off some guys, we also discussed the issue of privacy in a relationship and how big of a deal it can be when that privacy is violated. He maintains that checking your partner’s email, cell phone call log, and text messages is totally wrong, whereas I think it’s wrong, but not pathological or evil. Frankly, I know many women who do the occasional cell phone check or email glance (and a few women who do oh-so-much more), but what about guys? Do they ever pilfer through their girlfriends’ inboxes and Facebook accounts? I went to four taken guys on IM to find out. Keep reading »

Thoughts From Guys On Our IM: Do You Always Pay The Check On A Date?

Yesterday I wrote about a recent trend: More and more dates end in split checks. Several of my married female friends — and their husbands — were dismayed and shocked to hear about this, and so were some of you. Some believe that whoever does the asking should do the paying, while others think the guy should always pick up the check, at least for the first few dates. Recently, I went out with three guys in a row who didn’t pick up the check on the first date, and three is a trend, not a case of bad luck. So, I went to the guys on my IM to find out what the hell is going on. Turns out, I should be dating them. Keep reading »

Thoughts From Guys On Our IM: Do You Google Stalk Your Dates?

Marie Claire‘s Diana Vilibert has something crazy to admit: “Give me his name and 30 minutes, and I’ll give you his life story as told through Google, from the name of his childhood pet to a comprehensive collage of ex-girlfriends. I’m all for exhaustively Googling dates and digging up what’s out there.” And she’s not alone. Nearly every one of my female friends has Googled a potential date. Some have taken it to the extreme (background info on past GF’s maybe?), while most stick to the basics. What’s his favorite music? How funny is he? Most of what we want to find out about someone can be dug up on Facebook, but for the pesky dudes who makes their profiles private, Google offers a backup plan. Of course, you may end up finding out more than you bargained for. To be honest, I worry about potential dates Googling me. What I reveal on this site alone could scare off men. But do guys Google-stalk women before dates? Find out after the jump. Keep reading »

Thoughts From Guys On Our IM: How Often Do You Get Tested?

It’s STD Awareness Month! We’ve been talking a lot about the icky stuff you can get while bumping uglies, while Dr. V has urged you to have as much fun as you want, so long as you wear a condom. In the past, we’ve talked to the guys on our IM about how often they actually use condoms, but we’ve never grilled them about how often they get tested for STDs. And what I really wanted to know was how often they were actually honest when a potential sex partner asked them that question. Let’s find out… Keep reading »

Thoughts From Guys On Our IM: The First Time He Went Down

I remember my first blow job as if it was yesterday. A stairwell, in a bar, with a guy named Dave Wolf, who, just in case you might forget his last name, had a wolf tattooed on his shoulder. I was a late bloomer, sorta, so my first beej came when I was 19. But certainly guys must have as potent memories of the first time they went down on a girl — where did it happen? What did they think? And from where did they divine that initial technique? It was the perfect Tuesday lunchtime question for the guys on my IM… Keep reading »

Thoughts From Guys On Our IM: Why Didn’t You Text/Call Me Back?

Do you watch the show “Tough Love”? I don’t, but both Annika and Simcha have caught episodes and claim that it rivals my beloved “Millionaire Matchmaker.” That remains to be seen, but Steven Ward, the frat boyish matchmaker on the show, did have a rule that kind of rocked my world. “Text on a need to know basis,” he says, suggesting that when women text men with the most mundane messages (“Just wanted to say hi!”), guys will often ignore them, leading women to wonder, “Why hasn’t he texted me back?!” As someone who has always viewed texting a guy as a little safer than calling him outright, this surprised me. But do most guys really hate texting? And why don’t they call us back either, by the way? I went to the dudes on my IM to find out… Keep reading »

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