I worked from home yesterday, which means I had Bravo on in the background all day. Which means I got to catch up with the lovely and bizarrely accented Rosie Pope and her band of charmingly crazy preggo ladies. But this season’s debut episode featured perhaps one of the worst dudes on record: Fritz. Fritz, I’m coming for you. Fritz, who along with his wife Christina, is an “esoteric performance artist entrepreneur,” was adamant that his wife go out into the woods and give birth against a tree somewhere. Which is really easy for him to say since it’s not his body or anything. As you might imagine, his wife was less than convinced that this was a good idea, but acquiesced to his decision not to have a hospital birth. Instead, sort of against her will, she was having a home birth, without pain killers, because as Fritz explained, if she “makes it through the pain of childbirth without screaming or going to the hospital she’ll feel that she accomplished so much more.” Keep reading »
It’s really hard being pretty. That’s the sentiment held by the Rebecca Blacks of 2012, Double Take, who have made a simply horrific track called “Hot Problems.” Because “hot girls we have problems too, we’re just like you except we’re hot.” Clearly, two of their problems are 1) they can’t sing and 2) they will have no friends once their pals catch this video. [YouTube]
Hey, you know what? Kickstarter is super cool and great for stuff like supporting grassroots projects, films and businesses. You know what it’s not for? THROWING YOURSELF A GODDAMN BIRTHDAY PARTY. But yet! That’s exactly what some crapster named Jessi Arrington is manipulating Kickstarter for. She wants to throw “the world’s largest rainbow parade” (these are the goals our helicopter parents dreamed we would shoot for, guys), which basically involves party goers dressing up in monochromatic clothing of different colors and uh, you know, lining up like a freaking rainbow. Keep reading »
I’d like to officially say that I’m not responsible for any apoplectic fits you might fall into after watching this video of James Franco — clad in Kenny Powers-esque braids — lip-syncing to Selena Gomez’s “I Love You Like A Love Song.” It seems Mr. Franco, of whom I have a documented intense hatre, is making a new film with Gomez and crappy ’90s agent provocateur Harmony Korine called “Spring Breakers.” So yeah, I’m sure this is going to turn out great. [Huffington Post]
If I see you and your significant other swanning around with this heart-shaped “smitten” snuggle hand warmer, I’m going to roll my eyes at you. You two are monsters, really, if you buy this. It’s gross! Gross! Nobody wants to see your egregious display of love and affection in mitten form. PDA is one thing, but smitten wearers, you disgust me. [$18, Etsy]
Surely you had noticed it had become eerily quiet of late — the sound of your own thoughts had peacefully taken up residence in your head again. Your breath had calmly slowed, your pulse returned to a pleasantly dull rate. You weren’t sure what it was — what caused the strange, but welcome sense of calm and well-being that now permeated your very soul, but you were pleased at the feeling and were happy that the many mood enhancers and doses of Vallerian Root and melatonin were again at a minimum.
And then some very disconcerting news flashed before your eyes.
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