Posts tagged "the bachelor"

An Infographic Guide To “The Bachelor” (Week 10! And Your Next “Bachelorette” Is…)

Well, it turns out, ABC couldn’t decide between “charming, charismatic beauty, Britt” and “Kaitlyn, the gorgeous, fun- loving, warm-hearted, but irreverent firecracker.” (Um, Kaitlyn has more adjectives, doesn’t that count as extra points?) So they decided to do the most patriarchal thing ever: they’re letting the dudes decide. Last night on “After the Final Rose”…

By: Amelia McDonell-Parry / March 10, 2015

An Infographic Guide To “The Bachelor” (Week 9! The Women Tell All)

The season is almost over! So which of Chris’s rejected girlfriends would be your ideal next “Bachelorette”? This flowchart will hep you out…

By: Amelia McDonell-Parry / March 3, 2015

An Infographic Guide To “The Bachelor” (Week 8! The Sex-Less Fantasy Suite)

Good news! Becca finally did tell Chris that she’s a virgin and his response was to sigh heavily, smile and reassure her that he just requires biweekly blowjobs and a finger in the butt on special occasions. …

By: Amelia McDonell-Parry / February 24, 2015

An Infographic Guide To “The Bachelor” (Week 7! A Final Four “Bachelor” Baby!)

Reminder: Every Monday, I livetweet a new, exhaustingly long episode of “The Bachelor” on my personal Twitter (@xoamelia), giving a detailed, hilarious, wine-and-weed-influenced critique of “Prince Farming” (oh go fuck yourself with that nickname, Chris Harrison) and his search for a woman willing to move to a post-apocalyptic hell tundra Iowa. And then every Tuesday,

By: Amelia McDonell-Parry / February 17, 2015

An Infographic Guide To “The Bachelor” (Week 6! Chris Is A Terrible Boyfriend)

Reminder: Every Monday, I livetweet a new, exhaustingly long episode of “The Bachelor” on my personal Twitter (@xoamelia), giving a detailed, hilarious, wine-and-weed-influenced critique of “Prince Farming” (oh go fuck yourself with that nickname, Chris Harrison) and his search for a woman willing to move to a post-apocalyptic hell tundra Iowa. And then every Tuesday,

By: Amelia McDonell-Parry / February 10, 2015

Chris Soules Had “Shocking Run-Ins With The Law”

Rumors are swirling about the true intentions of “Bachelor” Chris Soules. Life & Style claims he lied about having moved to L.A. to be a star, had a secret past engagement, and is potentially a “fraud.” Well, it’s a reality show, what did we expect? Whatever, I’m still a Chris fan. [Celeb Dirty Laundry]
Harper Lee i…

By: Claire Hannum / February 9, 2015

10 Reasons Most “Bachelor” Relationships Don’t Work Out

I’ve been watching “The Bachelor” since middle school. Yeah, it’s been on for that long, and I remember watching the first “Bachelor” couple in history say “I do.” Those two were Trista and Ryan. They are still together eight years later, however, “The Bachelor” was a little bit different then. It was much less dramatic and a lot…

By: YourTango.com / February 9, 2015

An Infographic Guide To “The Bachelor” (Week 5! Crazy Widows, Grooming Habits & A Bonus GIF!)

Reminder: Every Monday, I livetweet a new, exhaustingly long episode of “The Bachelor” on my personal Twitter (@xoamelia), giving a detailed, hilarious, wine-and-weed-influenced critique of “Prince Farming” (oh go fuck yourself with that nickname, Chris Harrison) and his search for a woman willing to move to a post-apocalyptic hell tundra Iowa. And then every Tuesday,

By: Amelia McDonell-Parry / February 3, 2015

An Infographic Guide To “The Bachelor” (Week 4! My Worst Nightmare!)

Reminder: Every Monday, I livetweet a new, exhaustingly long episode of “The Bachelor” on my personal Twitter (@xoamelia), giving a detailed, hilarious, wine-and-weed-influenced critique of “Prince Farming” (oh go fuck yourself with that nickname, Chris Harrison) and his search for a woman willing to move to a post-apocalyptic hell tundra Iowa. And then every Tuesday,

By: Amelia McDonell-Parry / January 27, 2015

“SNL” Flawlessly Spoofs “The Bachelor” With Blake Shelton’s “Farm Hunk”

Never seen an episode of “The Bachelor”? It’s pretty much exactly like this. [NBC]…

By: Amelia McDonell-Parry / January 25, 2015

An Infographic Guide To “The Bachelor” (Week 3! By The Numbers!)

Reminder: Every Monday, I livetweet a new, exhaustingly long episode of “The Bachelor” on my personal Twitter (@xoamelia), giving a detailed, hilarious, wine-and-weed-influenced critique of “Prince Farming” (oh go fuck yourself with that nickname, Chris Harrison) and his search for a woman willing to move to a post-apocalyptic hell tundra Iowa. And then

By: Amelia McDonell-Parry / January 20, 2015

An Infographic Guide To “The Bachelor” (Week 2! WTF Is Wrong With Ashley S?)

Reminder: Every Monday, I livetweet a new, exhaustingly long episode of “The Bachelor” on my personal Twitter (@xoamelia), giving a detailed, hilarious, wine-and-weed-influenced critique of “Prince Farming” (oh go fuck yourself with that nickname, Chris Harrison) and his search for a woman willing to move to a post-apocalyptic hell tundra Iowa. And then every Tuesday,

By: Amelia McDonell-Parry / January 13, 2015

An Infographic Guide To “The Bachelor” (Week 1! Meet The Ladiesssssss!)


Click to see enlarged image!
Every Monday, I’ll be livetweeting a new, exhaustingly long episode of “The Bachelor” on both my personal (@xoamelia) and The Frisky’s Twitter accounts, giving a detailed, hilarious, wine-and-weed-influenced critique of “Prince Farming” (oh go fuck yourself with that nickname, Chris Harrison) and his search for a woman willing…

By: Amelia McDonell-Parry / January 6, 2015

New “Bachelor” Promo Is Both Weird And Kinda Creepy

This new “Bachelor” promo — featuring Hot Boring Farmer Chris — is seriously weird and creepy. Cornstalks! Whispering! In women’s voices! WHY? Was this directed by M. Night Shyamalan?
Oh thank god, Chad Kroeger says that rumors that he and Avril Lavigne have split are not true. Chavril LIVES. [People]
Hair company…

By: Amelia McDonell-Parry / November 7, 2014

Nikki Ferrell And Juan Pablo Galavis Are Over

Nikki Ferrell has dumped former “Bachelor” Juan Pablo Galavis! Rejoice! Yesterday, Ferrell unfollowed Galavis on social media and posted this cryptic quote on Instagram: “Isn’t it pathetic how we waste so much time on certain people and in the end they prove that they weren’t even worth a second of it. Nope not one…

By: Claire Hannum / October 27, 2014

“Bachelor” Juan Pablo Galavis Is Terrible, But Let’s Stop Taking It Out On Nikki Ferrell

“There’s definitely a culture barrier that people don’t understand. In Latin culture, there are many words you can say to a woman to tell her that you care about her: falling in love, loving her, needing her. Those words might not have a translation in English. Te Quiero [I like you], Te Quiero Mucho [I…

By: Claire Hannum / October 15, 2014

Juan Pablo Galavis Still Hasn’t Told “Bachelor” Winner Nikki Ferrell That He Loves Her

“Bachelor” winner Nikki Ferrell and Worst “Bachelor” Ever Juan Pablo Galavis are starring on VH1’s “Couples Therapy,” and in the first episode, Nikki says Juan Pablo still hasn’t told her he loves her yet. According to Juan Pablo, he hasn’t said it yet because love is “when you feel that you cannot live without…

By: Claire Hannum / September 11, 2014

Chris Soules Is Your New “Bachelor” Beefcake

Least surprising announcement in history: hot farmer Chris Soules will be the next star of “The Bachelor.” The adorable Iowan couldn’t tempt Andi Dorfman to the cornfields on last season’s “Bachelorette,” even though she would have inherited the world’s raddest mother-in-law. [US Weekly]
Samira Wiley from “Orange Is The New Black,” AKA Poussey,…

By: Jessica Wakeman / August 27, 2014

“The Bachelorette” Superlatives: Two Reasons I Had To Turn Off Last Night’s Episode

Every season, I dutifully sit through each needlessly long episode (two hours! why?!) of “The Bachelor” or “Bachelorette,” delighting in the ridiculousness of the various dates and awkwardness of the forced romantic interactions. But I hit a wall pretty early into last night’s episode and had to turn it off. Why? Well, I’ll let these…

By: Amelia McDonell-Parry / May 27, 2014
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