Ugh, my Fantasy Dream Boyfriend Joseph Gordon-Levitt is looking like a total tool these days. That’s because, I guess, he’s filming a new movie called “Don Jon’s Addiction.” In it, he plays a dude addicted to porn who falls in love with Scarlett Johannson so it makes sense that he’s overly tanned and bulked up, Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino-style. As such, we’re probably going to skip it and watch “Brick” again.
I am a little worried about the possibility of an impending apocalypse. Not only is Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi sober, pregnant, and excited to be a mom—but Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino has a girlfriend. Yes, a girlfriend. You know, one of those people who you let keep a toothbrush at your place rather than calling a cab to take home approximately five minutes after you’re done smushing? Her name is Caitlin J. Wood. Here’s hoping that she has had a full STD screening, and enjoys cleaning out hot tubs. Keep reading »
It’s that time again: “Jersey Shore” infects your TV again tonight. (Itch, itch, itch.) God, I can’t wait. “Mob Wives” return to television is not making me stupid enough. The boys stopped by Jimmy Kimmel’s couch this week to talk tanning and Jimmy couldn’t resist a question about whether there have ever been any dude-on-dude “hijinks in the shower.” There haven’t yet … at least none that anyone will admit to. I guess Deena’s hookup with one of The Situation’s twins in Italy was the first, and last, slightly gay thing to happen on that show. [Perez Hilton]