Tag Archives: the hills

The Hills Is A Sexless City

Catherine StrawnDecember 18, 2007 //

Some people say that The Hills is a younger, reality version of Sex and the City. We don’t really see how this can be true: There was actual sex (sometimes kinky) on SATC, but the most Brody Jenner has gotten from Lauren is a little make out action when they were in Vegas celebrating his birthday. Towards the end of this season we thought Lauren seemed a little cold and detached. For example, when Brody came over, she had tons and tons of candles all over her apartment, but despite the romantic lighting, he had to convince her to cuddle with him! We would cuddle with Brody any day (and kiss him with tongue, another rare occurrence on the show). [E!]
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The Hills Finale: That Was It?!

Amelia McDonell-ParryDecember 11, 2007 //

Catherine and I IM’d in a frenzy this morning about the snoozefest that was The Hills season finale (or wasssss it???) last night, so we’ll get to a recap in a second, but earlier in the day, TMZ reported that Heidi and Spencer (known in the blogosphere as “Speidi”) have called off their totally ridiculous engagement. They’re still together, but we’re hoping these two losers go the way of another broken engagement — Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez. Sure enough, Heidi walked the “red carpet” solo and left before the live taping at LA club Area could begin (Lauren put the kibosh on Heidi actually attending the festivities). After the jump, Catherine and I exchange a totally disappointed IM about our favorite show on Earth. But on a positive note, we’re both obviously on Team Brody. Keep reading »

The Hills: Bros Before Hos Is So Over

Amelia McDonell-ParryDecember 4, 2007 //

There were two main storylines on The Hills this week, one of which was boring (Lauren and Whitney go to New York to talk to Teen Vogue‘s editor about some stupid fashion show we don’t care about!) and one of which was strangely compelling (Brody and Spencer, can they make it work?). The latter spurned some deep thinking as to whether the old adage, “Bros before hos” has lost its meaning. So we IMed The Sensitive Guy, The Hipster Guy, and The Married Guy and this is what they had to say: Keep reading »

The Hills Starts To Resemble A Movie Of The Week

Amelia McDonell-ParryDecember 4, 2007 //

Unfortunately there has never actually been any knockin’ boots on The Hills, a pity since we would seriously pay money to see hot piece of ass Brody Jenner naked but for a smile on his face. That said, there are many lessons to learn about dating from this pack of Mensa members, particularly from super-serious-as-a-heart-attack (no really, can they both please have heart attacks?) couple Heidi and Spencer. Heidi is a back-stabbing girl-hater who ditched her friends for Spencer, a somewhat evil, media whoring celebutard who probably whittled down Heidi’s ego just enough so she’d get breast implants and a nose job. That said, it is interesting to note that while Heidi has, like, no friends left, neither does Spencer. This is a messed up rationale, but somehow both of their friendless-ness seemed to be an indication of their blind devotion to one another. It would be sweet if they weren’t so toxic. Our take on this week’s episode, after the jump… Keep reading »

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