It’s a new year. You know what that means — it’s time for another season of everyone’s favorite sadly embarrassing dating show, “The Bachelor”! I took a wee bit of a hiatus from “Bach”-snarking last season, because I literally could not muster up one single solitary fuck about “Bachelorette” Emily. So boring, and from what I understand, so was her season. I must admit, I was sort of tempted to keep up my “Bachelor” break this season when I learned the new leading man would be one of Emily’s rejects, Sean Lowe. With his bleaches blonde hair and orange-y tan, he’s practically her twin. But then I remembered that “The Bachelor” is never about the man in question, but the crazy women fighting for his heart. Also, I never have plans on Monday, so what else was I going to do with my time? So, let’s get to know Bachelor Bronze (my nickname for him, henceforth, because he is SO tan and he came in third in Emily’s season) and his bevy of desperately single broads… Keep reading »
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“The Bachelor” Recap: Sean Lowe, AKA Bachelor Bronze, Meets His Matches Including A Girl With One Arm, Three Women Of Color & A Familiar Face From A Previous Season
If you’re like us — well, except Amelia — you watched this latest season of “The Bachelor” cringing and hoping that bachelor Ben Flajnik wouldn’t pick resident sociopath/model Courtney Robertson. Ben’s flagrant disregard of the crazytown facts regarding “winning”-obsessed Courtney was mindblowing, but nonetheless, the couple seemed pretty happy after the show. But alas, their love eventually soured and now Ben is singing a different tune.
A Tennessee judge has dismissed a lawsuit filed by two black men who were suing ABC over alleged racial discrimination on “The Bachelor,” essentially deciding that casting is protected by the First Amendment. ABC has denied their practices are discriminatory, despite the fact its crop of “Bachelor” bros are the whitest crop of white dudes this side of a Tea Party rally. Keep reading »
- Well, that lasted 11 months longer than anyone expected it to last: Ben Flajnik and master man-manipulator Courtney Robertson have split. At least these two didn’t rush down the aisle to get married like other “Bachelor” contestants. [Us Weekly]
- Scarlett Johansson is supposedly none too pleased that ex-husband Ryan Reynolds married his “Green Latern” co-star Blake Lively because their marriage was falling part as he was making the film and she thinks Blake swooped in to scoop Ryan up. Scarlett’s very “bitter” and thinks Blake is “phony” and a “fame monster.” Oh, but it gets even cattier: “Scarlett also considers Blake to be a cheap version of herself. They’ve actually auditioned for the same roles a few times and Blake has always lost out.” Gossip blogs sure do love the ol’ catfight narrative, don’t they? [Showbiz Spy]
- How to get back the engagement ring, written by our very own Amelia. [Modern Man] Keep reading »
After being booted off “The Bachelorette” on Monday night’s episode, Chris Bukowski is confirmed as the final “Bachelor Pad 3″ contestant. Get ready for a heaping helping of drama, hookups, and roses when “Bachelor Pad” returns for its third season on July 23.
This season’s contestants include the standard “Bachelor” and “Bachelorette” rejects — some more entertaining than others — but there is a new twist this go-around, as there will also be five “superfans” (including twin sisters who count as one — yeah, I don’t get it either) competing for $250,000, with a possible side of romance. But let’s be honest, what we are really excited for is the crazy, which isBachelor Pad’s claim to fame. Even Chris proved in his final moments on Emily’s season that he had enough edge for the spin-off with his closing statement: “I’m 10 times the man of all those fucking dudes that are still there right now.” And what better way to see what we can expect from this group of rose rejects than to review their best and worst moments on TV? So check out this season’s standout contestants and their most dramatic moments from the “Bachelor” franchise now! Read more…
We’ve been waiting for someone to come up with a solid spoof of “The Bachelor,” and Michael Ian Black and Ken Marino have finally done it. Their show, “Burning Love,” features Marino as the typical clueless, self-centered bachelor, weeding through a classic assortment of hysterical lunatics and weirdos to find “true love.” Kristen Bell, Malin Ackerman and Ken Jeong — as delectable choice Ballerina — all play potential love matches, as does Jen Aniston in a surprise (big surprise!) cameo.
A Florida woman is reporting that she spotted Jesus on an episode of the “The Bachelor.” It wasn’t even the new season though, it was Brad Womack’s season, so I’m suspicious. What channel was airing that this week? And how convenient that this news be released during the week of the premiere of Emily Maynard’s run as “The Bachelorette.” I wonder if Brad is behind all this. Conspiracy!
Anyhow, Guerda Maurice of Port St. Lucie claims that she was watching an episode of “The Bachelor” and spotted a tent in the background that she wanted to put in her backyard, so she took a picture of the screen with her cell phone. That’s when things got divine. “My phone was vibrating and so warm, and very warm and hot like a burning smell,” said Maurice. “I flipped the phone and I see Jesus’ picture and I said, ‘Oh my God, where did this picture come from?’” And here is said picture of Bachelor Tent Jesus. Thoughts? My only thought is that if Jesus did choose to appear on Earth, I suspect he wouldn’t want to be associated with “The Bachelor” franchise. Unless he was attempting to present the world with a rose.
Any true believer will tell you that Jesus’ image can appear almost anywhere if you look hard enough. Keep on clicking to see some more of the craziest places Christ has popped up. [Mediaite]
Say it isn’t so! Chris Harrison, “The Bachelor”‘s host and resident wise man, has split from his wife of 18 years, Gwen. As a diehard Bach fan, I’ve always felt affectionately about ol’ Harrison, and have been impressed with his stamina for this whole charade, especially since he clearly knew what it took to make a relationship work. Was I wrong? Remember when Rozlyn Papa, who was booted from Pilot Jake Pavelka’s season because she had some sort of romantic dalliance with a producer, accused Chris of flirting with that producer’s ex-wife? I thought it was total BS at the time … but what if being famous — for seriously delivering the line, “This is the final rose” — has gone to his head? All that being said, I am officially in favor of making Chris Harrison the next “Bachelor.” Why not? He’d be more fun to watch that Ben Flajnik. And he could still host! That’d be funny. [Have U Heard]
Two black men are taking ”The Bachelor” and ”The Bachelorette” to court with a lawsuitthat claims the reality shows are blocking contestants of color from starring roles.
Nathaniel Claybrooks and Christopher Johnson filed a federal lawsuit in Nashville Wednesday against the popular TV shows claiming they are engaged in a pattern of racial discrimination that intentionally excludes people of color. The Nashville men said at a casting call in August that they were given scant consideration compared to white men seeking a leading role for “The Bachelor.” Read more…
After Round One of our Real March Madness competition, Courtney Robertson’s man-ipulating ways stole Phaedra Parks’ relatively harmless thunder. Meanwhile, Arizona’s desire to allow doctors to lie to pregnant women about fetal birth defects trumped Virginia, with their fetal personhood and transvaginal ultrasound bills. At the end of the day, which is the crazier threat?
Who/What Is The Craziest: Lady-Hating Arizona Or Bachelor Vixen Courtney Robertson?
- Arizona's cruel craziness! (88%, 395 Votes)
- Courtney Robertson's conniving craziness! (12%, 55 Votes)
Total Voters: 450