Free associations I’m having while contemplating the Versace dress Jessica Biel wore to the “Playing For Keeps” premiere:
- Scissor attack.
- Intergalactic space queen.
- Real Housewives of the planet Zothar.
- Wrestler belt.
You? [Photo: WENN]
I just don’t get it, SJP. Aren’t you supposed to be, like, a fashion thing? I’m cool with the dress, even though it looks kind of like a Thanksgiving tablecloth, but paired with snakeskin pumps in Lisa Frank’s favorite colors and a blue velvet purse, I can’t help but feel like even Carrie Bradshaw would get all judgy on this one. This isn’t a look, it’s just like, items.
I’m usually right on board with Katie Holmes‘s classy, pared-down aesthetic, echoed in her line Holmes & Yang, so I cannot fathom why this crazy-busy dress would ever make it into her repertoire ― and with opaque tights and a bizarrely out of place clutch, no less. From the embellished bib to the awkward belt to the unflattering length and sack silhouette in a godawful print, this look is wrong in so very many ways. That said, her hair and makeup are flawless. What gives, Katie? I can’t believe Suri let you out of the house like this.
Russell Brand attended a yoga class with his mom over the weekend, and he wore, well, exactly what you might expect Russell Brand to wear to a yoga class: slouchy white T-shirt, transparent white harem pants tucked into waffle-knit legwarmers, flip-flops, and an eclectic selection of jewelry. As much as I admire him for bringing his signature rockstar Jesus style to the yoga studio, I feel bad for whoever was positioned behind him during downward dog. Those pants are miiiiighty see-through. [Photo: Fame/Flynet]
I’ve had a new appreciation for Ke$ha ever since I heard the hauntingly (and disconcertingly) beautiful acoustic version of her latest party song, “Die Young,” but a part of me is relieved to see she hasn’t strayed too far from her crazy, clashing fashion roots. Shower in glitter, sleep in your car, and wear all the prints at once, but never change, Ke$ha, never change. [Photo: Splash News]
I inexplicably fall more in love with Kristen Stewart with each passing day (I know, I know, I’m still coming to terms with it myself), but that still doesn’t mean I want to look at her bellybutton. Maybe it’s her surprisingly deft post-scandal rebound or the end of the “Twilight” series, but between her nude (like, actually nude) gown and this bellbottom jumpsuit mess (also courtesy of Zuhair Muhad), Kristen is all like, “LOOK AT MY BODY, BITCHES.” I think the baroque black lace is incredibly beautiful (though, yes, a bit “Twilight” On Ice), but it all goes downhill from, um, there down. This whole look is kind of appalling, but with that said, Kristen is young, beautiful, and all willowy-limbed and stuff, so I am going to let the girl have her transparent bodysuits without criticism. For the most part.
Yeesh. I think my opinion on this garish ensemble is best expressed by the look on Katie Holmes’ and Suri Cruise’s faces in the photo I posted earlier. So. Tacky. [Photos: WENN]
I’m not 100 percent sure what’s going on with Brandy’s jeans. They’re either a puffy crotch style that hasn’t exactly gone mainstream yet, or they’re equipped with a secret marsupial pouch that she’s using to store her wallet and a few granola bars. If it’s the latter, I must applaud her efficiency, but when you pair crazy pants with a crazy leopard print top and crazy-high Louboutin boots, the whole look is just a bit, well, crazy. [Photo: Splash News]
I love the idea bringing some of Stevie Nicks’ witchy, bohemian style into your wardrobe (in fact, Julie did a Stevie Nicks Style Inspiration post a while back that was spot on), but Demi Lovato’s Stevie-inspired outfit is way too literal for everyday wear. On the bright side, if you were looking for ideas for your Stevie Nicks Halloween costume, well, here you go! [Photo: Fame/Flynet]
While out and about in London, the future first lady of Canada bravely rocked an ensemble that included partially shaved My Little Pony hair, punk rock skull t-shirt, quilted leather jacket, jersey maxi skirt, bowler bag, and Tory Burch sandals. I have 100% worn this outfit to Walgreens to pick up cold medicine, so I get it, but for a nice dinner in London? Not so sure about this, Avril. [Photo: Fame/Flynet]