Never have sex with a girl unless she’s sent you a text that proves the sexual relationship is consensual beforehand. And it’s a good idea to even follow up any sexual encounter with a tasteful text message saying how you both enjoyed being with one another — even if you never plan on hooking up again.
This is the advice of Roxanne Jones, founding editor of ESPN The Magazine, in an op-ed on CNN.com about what she teaches her college-aged son as he navigates the sexual waters of university life. She continues:
Crazy, I know, but I’ve actually been encouraging my son and his friends to use sexting — minus the lewd photos — to protect themselves from being wrongly accused of rape. Because just as damning text messages and Facebook posts helped convict the high-schoolers in Steubenville of rape, technology can also be used to prove innocence.
In other words, Jones teaches her son that women cry rape all the time and he should protect himself from false accusations of sexual assault with inadmissable evidence, like a text message.
The only problem with this little plan is, well, everything. Keep reading »
Now that any online dating experience will eventually escalate to mobile messaging (whether What’s App, iMessage, or How About We’s app), it’s not enough to have mastered the English language. We live in an emoji world now. Originally added to iOS for Japanese teenagers, the diverse set of smileys is now used by people of all ages around the world. Emojis can function as avoidance, word substitution, or whimsy. But just as you choose your words carefully, you wouldn’t want to fling the octopus symbol around with abandon. Your latest Tinder match might assume you’ve got a fetish.
In his New York Times column, Nick Bilton recounted his friend’s emoji mishap, in which the woman involved would type flirtatious messages via emoji (the flamenco dancer, a martini) and her male counterpart responded with the thumbs-up icon. While the guy thought he was responding positively, the girl assumed she was being prodded into the friend zone. Some emojis are ambiguous, and they should be used with awareness of the situation. Our brief guide: Keep reading »
Everything that I say and write is important. Very important. Smetimes when I am writing and my thoughts are super, extra-important, I write it IN ALL CAPS for extra emphasis. Sure, I know some people read capital letters as “screaming,” i.e. rude. That’s especially true if you’re tweeting or writing an entire email in caps. But used sparingly, all caps work really well to denote enthusiasm, sarcasm, anger … a whole range of emotions that it is very important to express. Here are some noteworthy examples of times I used all-capital letters recently.
“IT LOOKS LIKE A BABY.”
— Texting a friend about Prince George.
— Emailing the entire Frisky staff last night about this baby ginger seal who was shunned by its mommy. (Winona responded, one-upping me, “OH EM GEEEEEEEEEEE.”)
Now, you might still be a little confused about when it is appropriate and when it is not appropriate to write in all caps to friends, family, and your entire office. Allow me to explain to you after the jump. Keep reading »
Rebecca Martinson, modern study in leaning in and sorority girl extraordinaire, has penned an advice column for BroBible called “A Guide To Getting A Guy To Text You The Morning After,” and surprise! It’s full of really solid advice! Rebecca’s like that friend we all have or definitely need — one who gives stringent, bracing advice that leaves you at first clutching your pearls but then nodding your head in agreement. Perhaps this kind of advice is a form of female pickup artistry; these instructions, once you strip away the aggressive, Regina George-ness of it all, are pretty good. The whole thing is kind of a gem. Let’s unpack this.
Keep reading »
As if dating wasn’t hard enough – you throw in a portable, typed-word machine and suddenly it’s pandemonium. Tones, intentions, invitations all get jumbled in this lawless land of shorthand communication. Suddenly the guy you’re dating’s “C u later” message means he’s dumping you when he really just wanted to let you know he’d see you at 8p.m. for Chinese food.
Oh texting, how you make things much, much more complicated than they have any right to be. I can’t tell you the hours my friends and I have spent reciting, decrypting, bemoaning, and conjuring up an honors thesis on a five-word text message.
Personally, I don’t like to be too harsh a judge on a guy’s texting style if I don’t really him. Everyone has their faults, after all. But there are some serious warning signs in the form of text messages. Below, the types of texters who warrant anything from healthy skepticism to restraining orders: Keep reading »