Tanning Mom’s not going to let a silly, little thing like a divorce get in her way of being fabulous. Patty K showed that single is sassy during a recent impromptu photo shoot for the paps. Allegedly she was on the way to the plastic surgeon’s office where she might have gotten her nose done. I was so busy looking at her nipples that I didn’t even notice her nose.
Now that she’s back on the market, I hope we’ll be seeing a lot more of the braless beauty working the catwalk…if only in her mind. Click through to see some of Tanning Mom’s most sultry, single gal poses.
This behind-the-scenes look at Tanning Mom on the set of “Kings of New York 2,” that gay porn she starred in. Based on what we see here, it was an excellent idea for her to go to rehab. I’m glad that she’s a sober, lifestyle blogger now, but it’s fun to reminisce about her wild days, when she got wasted at a drag show and fell on the red carpet or when she played a spray-tanning prostitute/receptionist in a gay porn. Sober or not, it’s a real pleasure to watch her work. I’m sorry, but this is one of the best things I’ve ever seen. It’s safe for work — if you don’t count the multiple f-bombs Tanning Mom drops. [Buzzfeed]
I can just retire from the internet now because Tanning Mom has launched a Tumblr, Tips From Tan Mom. I don’t know if it’s tips as much as a showcase of her new sober lifestyle and a vehicle to promote her music and film career. Hey, she probably has a lot more free time on her hands now that she’s not spending hours in the tanning bed or trying to get a porno flick produced. Why shouldn’t she spend the days (when she’s not on set or in the recording studio) making manicotti, working on woodcraft or taking the kids to the park. Yes, please. More, more, more! Below, a few of my favorite discoveries about my muse from her new blog. Keep reading »
Maybe the rest of you are over Tanning Mom. I’m still way up in Patricia Krentcil’s blonde weave. She is and always will be the life of my party. Her latest single “Life of the Party” featuring Adam Barta does not disappoint. Please enjoy Tanning Mom making out with a drag queen, seductively eating a Pop Tart, singing about going to rehab with Michael Lohan and wearing an ill-fitting thong. Also, there’s a talking dog. Live it. Love it. Tanning Mom. [The Hollywood Gossip]
We get that having a tan can feel good, especially in the summer. But most of us don’t understand Tanning Mom’s desire to obtain that leathery shade of brown. And then there are others for whom Patricia Krentcil is a tanning icon.
Trish Paytas — you might remember her from an episode of “My Strange Addiction” – doesn’t get why everyone is attacking Tanning Mom. “I don’t know why people were making such a fuss — [Tanning Mom's] a beautiful color. Her tan would look great on me,” said the 24-year-old lingerie model who spends about $40,000 a year to get her skin that color. We beg to differ. Keep reading »
Every once in awhile a story so strange, so bizarre or so WTF comes along that it leaves us no choice but break it down into its most essential parts and try to make sense of it all.
We knew Tanning Mom might have a drinking problem when she had a drunken spill and flashed her panties on the red carpet at NYC’s XL Hot Mess Drag Review. We were hoping that once she got tan sober that she would also cut back on the booze. No such luck on either front. Last week, Patty Kretcil hit rock bottom when she was pronounced too drunk to fly at a Minneapolis airport and placed in detox.
Days later, a report confirmed that Tanning Mom checked into rehab at Lukens Institute in Palm Beach, Florida, with Michael Lohan at her side. Uh, wait. What does Michael Lohan have to do with this? Well, aside from his own experience with rehab — both his own and his daughter’s, it turns out that Tanning Mom and Papa Lohan are old friends from Cold Spring Harbor High School in Long Island. I don’t even want to know what their superlatives were. [TMZ]
To quote Amelia when she alerted me that Tanning Mom’s music video for her new single, “It’s Tan Mom,” was available for viewing: “Christmas has come early.” I don’t celebrate Christmas because I’m a Jew. But this video is what I would ask for if I made a Christmas list. I’ve dreamed of it. I’ve envisioned it in my mind. I’ve laid awake at night, too excited to sleep wondering what kind of performance Patty would turn out. Would she dance? Would she wear costumes? Would we get to see her modeling a bikini again? Would co-stars from her gay porn be in it?
As is often the case with the best things in life, this video is better than anything I could have imagined. It has all the elements of great art. Tanning Mom. Check. Wigs. Check. Psychedelic effects. Check. Token gays. Check. Awkward dancing. Check. Feeling up of boobs. Check. Bikinis. Check. Gratuitous use of suntan lotion. Check.
I don’t care what the haters say. I feel really happy inside my soul. [DListed]
It’s only a matter of time now before Tanning Mom makes her dream of becoming a famous actress come true. Her pitch to star in a porn of her own was rejected by Vivid Entertainment. But as fate would have it, another production company has recognized all of Patty K’s untapped potential. Lucas Entertainment, a company that produces a gay porn, has decided to give Tanning Mom her big break. Wait for it. Tanning Mom will have a cameo in the latest installment of series called “Kings of New York.” Oh yes, she will! Keep reading »
Take that, Farrah Abraham getting done up the pooper by James Deen! You have been outdone by Tanning Mom! No, she didn’t make a sex tape. TMZ obtained a snippet of Patricia Krentcil’s soon-to-be-released single, “It’s Tan Mom.” I knew it would blow my mind, but I didn’t know how much it would blow my mind. And it’s only one minute’s worth. Teaser: there is extreme auto-tuning, there are dance beats, there are lyrics like, You all are losers/ I’m sexier than the Teen Mom/ I am cool/ I’m the cool one/ I’m hotter than the Octomom.
Yes. YESSSS. I cannot wait for the music video. Let there be bows! [Buzzfeed]
I guess when the sex tape thing didn’t pull through, Tanning Mom, my muse, had to come up with another way to stay in the spotlight. What about her biopic starring her? I’m dying for that! Anyhow, Patty Krentcil decided to hit the recording studio and cut her first single, “It’s Tan Mom!” The truth is, I don’t care why she’s releasing her new single, just that she is. The track, which begins with Tanning Mom channeling her inner Britney Spears (“It’s Tan Mom, bitch!”) is due out on iTunes May 6. That should pretty much be the best day of my life. Until then, I guess I’ll have to listen to other ill-conceived singles released by people desperate to extend their 15 minutes. I don’t include Reality TV stars in this category because they ALL try their hand at a music career. My two exceptions are Danielle Staub and Courtney Stodden because I have love for those cray bitches. After the jump, some of my favorite never-were-celebrity songs. [AU News] Keep reading »