Posts tagged "tabloid cheat sheet"

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Michelle Obama Jealous Of Oprah? Angelina Being Committed?

It seems like the tabloids are fishing out of the same barrel for stories this week. Besides a few original news stories, they seemed to share identical trending topics. I’m pretty sure that all these tabloids work out of the same office and just pick their spin out of a hat. Some day, I’m going…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / August 11, 2010

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Sandra’s Baby Death Threats? Eddie Cheating On LeAnn?

With a weekend full of weddings, you’d think that the tabloids would’ve been glorified wedding albums, but instead it was another week of cheating scandals and drama. Basically, marriages are failing left and right and it seems silly to bother at all if this is the inevitable outcome. Sure, it could be the stresses of…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / August 4, 2010

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Tiger Marrying Rachel? Angelina’s Heroin Binge Photos?

Tabloids might represent something detestable about modern society, but at the same time, they’re keeping alive one of the world’s oldest arts—storytelling. The weaving of a good tabloid story doesn’t happen easily, it requires snoops, narcs, tattle-tales, “friends” and sometimes a few white lies. Often, the story is drawn out to be as dramatic a…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / July 28, 2010

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Oprah Was A Teenage Prostitute? Gore’s Masseuse Abuse Plot Thickens?

It’s a slow news week when the biggest stories are about bikini bodies and celebrities without makeup, but this week had some pleasant surprises as well. A certain husband-stealing vixen made some endearing remarks about her family to People, for instance. And friends and families voiced support for one loud-mouthed abusive anti-Semite and one ginger…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / July 21, 2010

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Jennifer Has Kids? Mel Hit The Baby?

I’ve come to accept that I am now a gossiper. A few years ago, I’d never bought a tabloid and prided myself on not following reality television. And now whenever someone brings up a celebrity, I know at least 10 totally unimportant things about them—which makes it hard to keep my street cred. But celebritie…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / July 14, 2010

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Joel Cheating On Nicole? A Baby For Jessica Simpson?

It’s that time of year, just past spring fever, when all the baby rumors start. I guess the idea is that once the snow thawed, everyone started shacking up and doing the deed. So, it’s no surprise that this week’s tabloids are all baby dramas and alleged relationships, often simultaneously. I guess that’s why they…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / July 7, 2010

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Ali’s Nude Photo Scandal? The Travoltas’ Miscarriage Scare?

Even on a relatively slow news week, the tabloids always manage to come up with something and I guess I admire their perseverance. There will always be a celebrity somewhere, trying to lose weight, trying to overcome obstacles, and accidentally flashing some cellulite. The more I read the tabloids, the more I’m glad to not…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / June 30, 2010

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Vienna Cheated And Jake’s A Monster? Britney’s Lesbian Crush On Her Therapist?

It’s been a funny week in Tabloid town now that The Frisky has officially joined the gossip game. Just a few hours after I inadvertently outed Vienna Girardi for her flirting with another dude this weekend, she and Jake announced their breakup. (Dear Gregory Michael, I’m sorry I blew your cover, I had no idea…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / June 23, 2010

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Prince William’s Fiance Preggers? Kate Gosselin’s New Man?

I don’t know what has gotten into Tinseltown, but this week’s tabloids are super hit-or-miss. And I think it’s safe to blame Brad Pitt’s beard, or lack thereof. The theme of this week’s cheat sheet is forgiveness—the cheaters are begging at their ex-wives’ doorsteps Also, lots of pre-marital sex is still going on and everyone’…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / June 16, 2010

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: ScarJo And Ryan Are Adopting? Ali Fedotowsky Got Fat?

This week, I had the pleasure of interacting with actual tabloid reporters at an MTV red carpet event. And they were kind of just like me, but more shrewd in the questions they asked. And more persistent in their asking. I watched one guy silently mouthing his questions while another one made sure she wa…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / June 9, 2010

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Secretly Gay Celebs? Paris Hilton And Adrien Brody?

It’s a beautiful summer day in Hollywood and the celebs are just waking up, yawning in their beds, blissfully unaware that the tabloids have smeared their lives all over their covers. Today there are baby bumps, drugs, breakups, and lots of gay things going town in Tabloidville. Luckily, we’re here to scan and condense it…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / June 2, 2010

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Bret Is Ignoring Doctors? The Travoltas Are Expecting Twins!

I don’t know if you guys realize this, but it’s almost summer. And if you remember what happened last summer, I’ll remind you delicately—stars fell left and right. I think that this time around, we need to take better care of them. “Intervention” has a lot of work to do and to maintain balance, we…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / May 26, 2010

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Kristen And Robert Engaged? Oprah Evil?

Another Wednesday, another sex scandal. You’d think that celebrity men would quit sleeping with call-girls since selling their stories to the tabloids is obviously more lucrative than spending an hour with them. But it’s not sad sack time in Tabloid Town—there are also plenty of new babies to ogle and a few marriages that have…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / May 19, 2010

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Scarlett Johansson And Ryan Reynolds Divorce? “Glee” Cheating Scandal?

It’s hump day again and since it’s springtime, we should all take a cue from the bunnies and take advantage of the verb. Looks like the celebs are busy enough for the rest of the population, at least if you believe everything you read is true. And why wouldn’t you? Wasn’t it God who invented…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / May 12, 2010

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Hollywood Housekeepers Tell All? Heidi Admits She Made A Mistake?

I don’t know how it’s May already. But I guess that just like in nature, the tabloid’s April showers have brought May flowers. And by flowers, I mean more babies, slightly more upbeat stories, and my favorite story of the day, “Hollywood Housekeepers Tell All.” I guess there’s something about the sunshine and crisp spring…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / May 5, 2010

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Sandra Bullock Talks Baby/Divorce! Vivienne And Knox Have Down Syndrome?

It’s a totally beautiful day today and amidst all the drama in the world, the tabloids are miraculously upbeat. Everyone lost a bunch of weight and celebs are being really nice to each other this week. Most importantly, Sandra Bullock has a new baby! I know I should have given you guys a spoiler alert,…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / April 28, 2010

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Justin And Cameron Reuniting? Angelina Preggers?

It seems that with spring in the air, everyone is boarding the baby train, which I guess makes most people all weepy with joy. But over here at the Curmudgeon Club, we don’t advocate such horizontal hijinks and merry manhandling. Everyone needs to knock it off. I don’t want to read about how happy everyone…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / April 14, 2010

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Jen And Gerard Are Baby-Making? Kate Gosselin Is After Jake Pavelka?

While I’ve been digesting Easter Peeps and other things that aren’t meant to be broken down by the human body, the stars have been suuuper busy falling in love, getting in bikini shape, breaking up, and throwing tantrums. They make me feel so lazy. But learning about their trials and tribulations is almost like leaving…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / April 7, 2010

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Snooki’s Twins? Jesse James’ Dog Fighting?

Happy springtime, birdies! Love is in the air and flowers are … starting to think about flowering sometime relatively soon? But here in Hollywood, the stars are already tending to the birds and the bees. They’re hunting for the metaphorical egg and checking out each other’s baskets. It’s a total moral free-for-all most of the…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / March 31, 2010

Tabloid Cheat Sheet: Sandra Bullock Was Preggers? Angelina Jolie’s After Vanessa Paradis?

There seems to be a massive fail in celebrity couplings lately, with actresses leaving their husbands and husbands collecting grody mistresses. But what will this mean for tabloid town? It’s gonna be a musical chairs of alleged lovers and wife-swapping, that’s what. It also means that the trashiest of journalistic endeavors have become approximately 42…

Amelia McDonell-Parry / March 24, 2010