Tag Archives: suri cruise

Quickies: Suri Cruise Has Better Shoes Than You Do & Kanye West’s Decapitated “Monster” Model Speaks

Jessica WakemanJune 10, 2011 //
  • In addition to these cutie-patootie galoshes, Star magazine claims Suri Cruise, age four, has a pair of mini Louboutin heels and several pairs of Marc Jacobs shoes. Let that sink in for a sec. [DListed]
  • Sean Penn allegedly told Scarlett Johansson she better go back to college, take a political science course, and better educate herself if she’s going to speak out about politics. That’s so douchey! I’ve never heard ScarJo say anything dumb about politics. She reportedly got dumped by him, but I’d be willing to bet it was the other way around. [Celebitchy]
  • Kanye West may have defiled the maidenhood of an Olsen twin. Rumor has it he was seen canoodling Mary-Kate Olsen, who is the “bad” one. This would be the weirdest couple ever. [Stuff NZ]
  • “The Undefeated,” a pro-Sarah Palin documentary, is getting a nationwide release. But first it has some salty language in it that needs to be cleaned up first. What would a hockey mom say? [NYMag.com]

Keep reading »

Department Of Nonsensical: Suri Cruise In Heels At The Beach

Julie GersteinMay 31, 2011 //

So, everybody knows that walking in heels in sand is virtually impossible. So why in the heck would both Katie Holmes and her little girl Suri Cruise wear heels to play around in the sand? The pair were spotted all dolled up at a Memorial Day beach party in Malibu. Ladies, ladies, ladies! Sensible flip-flops please! You’re making my calves hurt just looking at ya! Keep reading »

Frisky Rant: Katie Holmes, Penis Is Not A Dirty Word!

Amelia McDonell-ParryMarch 31, 2011 //
Who Has The Bigger Penis?
shirtless man photo
Whip 'em out, boys. We'll be the judge of that! Read More »
7 Famous Penises In History
David sculpture photo
This dongs will go down in the history books. Or should, anyway. Read More »

When I was five years old, I used to play with a little girl named Megan who lived across the street from my grandmother. One day, we were at Megan’s house playing with Barbie and Ken and I had a confusing realization. Grabbing the Ken doll, I asked Megan’s mom, “Why doesn’t Ken have a penis?” pointing out his vaguely bulging crotch. Megan’s mom immediately sent me home and told me to never come back. Apparently, “penis” was a dirty word in Megan’s house. (Ironically, there were other dirty things in Megan’s house, as she gave me lice.)

Katie Holmes kind of reminds me of Megan’s mom. Remember that photo of Suri Cruise holding a bag of penis gummies? (It’s, duh, above.) Well, Katie addressed the “controversy” on “Ellen” yesterday, although she couldn’t bring herself to actually say the word. Penis, I mean. Read on! Keep reading »

Suri’s Sexy Snack

Amelia McDonell-ParryMarch 17, 2011 //

Suri Cruise‘s snack time is sexier than most kids’. Katie Holmes gives her some gummy penis to munch on. She must have run out of the more appropriate gummy bears or gummy worms. No use in shielding her from the world forever. [TMZ] Keep reading »

Suri Cruise Is Nobody’s Fashion Darling

Julie GersteinJanuary 7, 2011 //

“The other day we came out of a store, and she said, ‘I want to go there,’ pointing at another store quite a distance away. In that store was the dress that she wanted. I said, ‘Wow, Suri. You’re something. You picked that out from a football field away.’”

–Katie Holmes on her ridiculously fashion-forward daughter Suri. [Elle] Keep reading »

Suri Cruise Clings To Her Parents For Warmth In Freezing NYC

Amelia McDonell-ParryDecember 21, 2010 //

Seriously, what do Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes’ have against covering this child’s bare limbs? It’s straight-up freezing in New York City right now and I don’t leave my apartment without a sweater, a heavy coat, a scarf, and ear muffs. Meanwhile, Suri looks like she’s dressed for a balmy summer day in Miami. Get this child some pants and a jacket before she catches hypothermia! Keep reading »

Tim Gunn Calls Suri Cruise A “Dress-Up Doll”

Annika HarrisSeptember 17, 2010 //

“Suri is her mother and father’s dress-up doll. I think in many ways she’s a fashion victim and it’s very inappropriate … I feel bad for her.”

– Tim Gunn is definitely on a war path against divas and seems to have the adage of “any publicity is good publicity” as his strategy. He has no problem saying exactly what’s on his mind as he promotes his new book. [Starpulse.com] Keep reading »

Quotable: Suri Cruise “Designs” Her Own Clothes

Annika HarrisAugust 16, 2010 //

“I grew up the youngest of five, so there were a lot of hand-me-downs that I would sort of change up. And Suri and I do that now with her clothes. Or rather, she does it. She says, ‘I want this sleeve cut,’ and it’s like, ‘Okay, we’ll cut it’ … I started making clothes for Suri when she was born, designing dresses, and then having seamstresses sew them, because I don’t sew very well. As a child, I was always drawing clothes, and I’ve always loved fabrics, and when Suri was born, I wanted to have certain things be from me and created just by me for her … Tom and I went to the Met ball a couple of years ago and I had this beautiful red gown and these royal-blue shoes that I wasn’t planning on wearing, but Suri made me put them on and so I was like, ‘Okay, I trust you.’”

– Katie Holmes on Suri‘s “designing” prowess or spoiled brattiness, depending on how you choose to look at the situation. [Hollywood Life] Keep reading »

Suri Cruise Gets Leg Tattoos?

StyleList HomeJune 27, 2010 //

Looks like little Suri Cruise has gone from being a future style icon to being the next Bombshell McGee. The fashionable 4-year-old was spotted in NYC yesterday with her legs covered in tattoos! Read more … Keep reading »

Suri Slips Into Something A Little More Comfortable

Erin FlahertyApril 8, 2010 //

Suri Cruise may be known for sporting some pretty grown-up, high-heeled kicks, but even famous kids need to give their arches a break. The best remedy for sore feet? A nice warm Epsom salt soak and a pair of cushy bunny slippers. [NYC, 4/8/10] Keep reading »

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