Over the years, I’ve made a commitment to helping you get laid. And if you followed the advice in those articles, you’re probably having some trouble reading this one because the writhing mass of naked bodies you’re currently tangled up in won’t hold still. So you’ve got the hot, meaningless sex part down, but studies show that young people are still more interested in relationships than hookups, and, despite the sky-high divorce rate, the vast majority of people still want to get married one day.
You’re Looking For A Soul Mate: While your grandmother probably prayed that her future husband would be a caring father or know how to raise a barn or just be a supernatural hump machine (pausing to let that image sink in), these days it seems everyone is hoping to find their “soul mate.” And while it may sound romantic, in reality trying to find your soul mate can lead to The Last Airbender levels of disappointment. Read more on Cracked…
You’re sitting in your cubicle at work and you get an email from your boss asking you if you [insert task pertinent to your line of work here]. Your heart plummets into your stomach. Your worst fears are confirmed. You fucked up. You start to sweat. shake, hyperventilate. You briefly consider leaving everything you know behind and joining one of those alternative communities where you can live off the grid and hunt for your own food just so you don’t have to write back to your boss and admit, NO, you have not yet finished the [insert task pertinent to your line of work here]. There’s a part of your rational mind that recognizes, YES, your reaction is insane because this is a one-sentence email we’re talking about here. Maybe your boss’ tone wasn’t meant to be accusatory/condescending/condemning/shaming/the pre-cursor to getting fired. You know that your mother would tell you that you’re overreacting and need to pull yourself together. Still, in that moment you’re pretty sure that this email is the make-it-or-break-it moment of your entire life. And it’s only 10:30 a.m. on a Monday. It’s going to be a loooong week. Sound familiar? Keep reading »
Hooray for the shy and insecure! As it turns out, eye contact isn’t always as powerful as we thought. A new paper in the journal Psychological Science says that eye contact can actually make you less persuasive to others. Keep reading »
How do I put this in a way that won’t lead my coworkers and family to stage an intervention? I am a functioning wino, by which I mean I drink a lot of wine, but I’m always on time for work, rarely get wasted or have drunken outbursts, and smell just fine, thank you. How much wine do I drink? LOL I’m not telling you because I don’t necessarily know that I could quantify it. And I’m not alone! A new study out of Iowa of all places (not the Napa Valley or my apartment?) found that most wine drinkers have no idea how much they’re drinking — or how drunk they are — because they’re just, like, not paying attention I guess? The Des Moines Register reports:
The study, published in Substance Use and Misuse, found that participants poured 12 percent more wine into a wide glass than a narrow glass. They also poured 12 percent more wine into a glass they were holding, versus one placed on a table. Color contrast affected pours, too. Participants over-poured white wine into a clear glass by 10 percent. There was less over-pouring when the wine was red.
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My first instinct when holding an absurdly cute, especially chubby baby is obviously to try to take a bite out of its leg. Am I weird? Maybe. I don’t have the willpower to resist a roll of chubby, baby thigh. It must be nibbled on. I feel similarly about cupcakes.
According to new research, this does not make me a psychotic, cannibal baby-eater. A study published in the latest issue of Frontiers in Psychology found that the smell of a fresh baby activates all kinds of crazy pleasure centers in women’s’ brains. When two groups of women — those who had given birth in the last six weeks and those who had never given birth — sniffed the pajamas of two-day-old infants, they all went wild, but the new mothers brains lit up like pinball machines hitting the high score. Why? Because baby smell triggers the same part of our brains that make us think we’ve found a cupcake when we’re starving. Keep reading »