I love me some babies. But some parents are really the worst.
On Friday evening, Ruth Burgos of Denver changed her one-year-old son’s diaper on the seating area of a Starbucks because there was no changing area in the bathroom. An employee tossed a rag at Burgos, according to her husband Alex, and told her in a “demeaning” tone that she should sanitize the seat. “He said make sure to wipe the seat when you’re done,” Alex Burgos recounted. “They started talking amongst themselves and laughing about it.”
So her husband, naturally, decided to pour his venti coffee all over the floor. “And I said make sure you clean that,” he said. Employees and Alex Burgos then “exchanged strong words and hand gestures.” Starbucks responded, rightfully so, by calling police on them. Keep reading »
Starbucks’ baristas getting customers’ names wrong is the stuff of legends — and “Saturday Night Live” skits.
As a “Julie” I’m pretty much guaranteed to get a cup with “Judy” scrawled across it, but fuck it, I’ll live. Amelia’s gotten Amoeba. Ami’s gotten Emmy. The name Virginia, though, is apparently a bit trickier. Earlier this week, a woman named Virginia visited a Starbucks in Hong Kong and got a cup with “Vagina” scrawled across it. The woman’s sister was angered by the is-this-my-sister’s-name-or-my-genitals Starbucks experience, and posted a note on the store’s Facebook page. Keep reading »
Since it took, like, a humorously long time to get internet set up at my new place (silly Comcast!), I’ve spent the last week and a half working from coffee shops. And here’s the thing: no matter where I went, from a tiny hipster coffee shop to a bustling midtown Starbucks, I saw the same people. Not the exact same people, obviously, but the same basic cast of characters. Who are they? Read on to find out… Keep reading »
Just a friendly reminder to all of you lovers out there that not every kind of gift is appropriate for the Valentine’s Day holiday. This Facebook suggestion was sent to me by an engaged friend of mine. Really, Facebook? The best you can do is suggest that a woman “surprise” her fiancé with a Starbucks gift card this Valentine’s Day? Nothing against Starbucks — or coffee even — I’m a caffeine addict. But if I had a special someone and he surprised me with a Starbucks gift card, that would be, well, odd. Add this to the list of V-Day presents that will not get you laid. Oh, and “the gift of cancer screening.” It’s a real thing. I got a PR email about it. Not OK.
Dear Anonymous Starbucks Baristas,
I never thought that making Starbucks beverages was that complicated. Starbucks is basically fast food. And I say this as someone who drinks at least one Starbucks beverage every single day of my life.
But apparently there is a lot that baristas think the unwashed masses don’t understand about frothing milk, so: okay. This Valentine’s Day, I don’t have a heterosexual male to buy a Hallmark card and wear uncomfortable lingerie for. So my love letter is to you, Starbucks baristas. Specifically, the baristas who don’t screw up my order. Keep reading »
If you’ve ever worked in a coffee shop, you know it can be a stressful, crazy, demanding job. You spend all day dealing with cranky customers, getting chocolate syrup in your hair, pouring mugs of boiling milk, trying to keep your cool when the espresso machine breaks during a rush, and going home smelling like coffee beans–all for minimum wage. I reached out to baristas who work for international coffee chains and artsy little coffeehouses (and everywhere in between), and asked them one question: “What do you wish you could tell everyone who walks into your coffee shop?” Here is what they said, in their own words… Keep reading »
On this week’s criminally unfunny “Saturday Night Live,” featuring underused host Jennifer Lawrence, there was one actually hilarious moment; the show did a faux commercial for Starbucks’ new enhanced Verismo system, which gives you the authentic Starbucks customer experience. Nobody spelling your name right? Check. Getting your drink wrong? Yup. Excessively long wait times? Uh huh. And a cornucopia of gross coffee refuse strewn about everywhere? You betcha.
Dear Beautiful Existence [yes, that's really her name],
First of all, bitchin’ name, sister.
Second of all, I am not entirely sure you are not a Starbucks plant. But nevertheless, your goal to spend the whole of 2013 only eating and drinking food and beverages from Starbucks leads me to believe we should be best friends. Keep reading »
Forget about the 12 days of Christmas — for chocoholics, Decembers is all about the 25 days of CHOCOLATE. For those of you who weren’t lucky enough to grow up with the Advent calendar tradition, it’s a calendar with 25 tiny boxes, which each contains a piece of chocolate inside. This festive Advent calendar from Starbucks gives you a piece of chocolate every day throughout the month of January until Christmas, plus five tiny presents inside. Don’t tell Santa that your sweet tooth has been very naughty this year. [$29.95, Starbucks Store]